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Mrs.McCall
02-10-2006, 06:06 PM
You've not been gone long
But I question if I can go on
I wonder where you are now
If you're smiling down at me
I seem to be over it so soon
But I am locked up in my greif
I can't get over the anger or the disbelief
You left me suddenly
You ripped yourself from my life
Lay sweet, brother, rest in peace
You're an angel in the night
Let the light guide you home
In my heart you'll never die
I am proud to call you brother
Life is so tough now you're not around

That's tasty
02-10-2006, 08:48 PM
AWWW!!

Ezzie.
02-10-2006, 10:03 PM
That;'s a beautiful poem... also adding to the effect that i lost my brother too and i'm also listening to stairway to heaven- ledzeppelin, Makes your poem even more powerfull, great job +rep

Mrs.McCall
07-10-2006, 08:45 PM
thanks :D

Sentrax
22-10-2006, 09:59 AM
I agree, very powerful, effective, influential...
My only slight criticism is that you could have ended with an optimistic line, to give the reader a sense of hope. But that's just my personal opinion.
9/10
+rep

Shadow16
22-10-2006, 12:31 PM
Nice poem :) 9/10 + rep

Mrs.McCall
22-10-2006, 02:34 PM
I agree, very powerful, effective, influential...
My only slight criticism is that you could have ended with an optimistic line, to give the reader a sense of hope. But that's just my personal opinion.
9/10
+rep

Hey, thanks for all your comments. I didn't want to end with optimisitc line because, at the time of writing, I didn't feel optimistic. To me poetry is all about reflecting how you feel, not what the reader would like to hear.

Thanks for your comments, much appreciated!

Sentrax
24-10-2006, 07:13 PM
Hey, thanks for all your comments. I didn't want to end with optimisitc line because, at the time of writing, I didn't feel optimistic. To me poetry is all about reflecting how you feel, not what the reader would like to hear.

Thanks for your comments, much appreciated!

Great point, I agree..
I think I'll +rep you again for saying that, well deserved.

UPDATE: Can't yet, you'll get it eventually. :P

MusicPalace
09-11-2006, 03:02 AM
there never was such a poem that brought a tear to my eye. It is wonderful, but sad. :eusa_clap

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