Advise Needed (+repping)

[Hopeless]

Basically i like one of my close mates, and it drives me mad... and he is always with girls so i thought, ok he isn't gay... but lately he's been different with me, he's been all flirty with me but its been in a jokey way, so i don't know if to take it as a joke or what. No one knows im gay so he may be embarrased about his own sexuality? i duno :(

anything i can look out for to see if he likes me or anything at all... thnx

[StripedTiger]

I'd wait a little while.. see if his behaviour becomes any more obvious?
You could try dropping subtle hints that his sexuality will never effect your friendship? Make him a bit more confident in saying if he is gay or not? See what happens then.

[DanielJohnx]]

I'd wait a little while.. see if his behaviour becomes any more obvious?
You could try dropping subtle hints that his sexuality will never effect your friendship? Make him a bit more confident in saying if he is gay or not? See what happens then.


Basically i like one of my close mates, and it drives me mad... and he is always with girls so i thought, ok he isn't gay... but lately he's been different with me, he's been all flirty with me but its been in a jokey way, so i don't know if to take it as a joke or what. No one knows im gay so he may be embarrased about his own sexuality? i duno :(

anything i can look out for to see if he likes me or anything at all... thnx


Ok i agreee

but i am fancied by a boy but i joke around in a flirty way back. So i would wait.


If you can.

Warning: Most straight guys are scared of gays.

[Ardemax]

Ok i agreee

but i am fancied by a boy but i joke around in a flirty way back. So i would wait.


If you can.

Warning: Most straight guys are scared of gays.

Most straight guys are scared of gays?
There's 2 ways I picture that sentence. Try rephrasing please.
Hmm, well, it might not be any of use, but I like a lot of people. And well, you just become more friendly with them, and soon enough, you'll hear things that other people mustn't hear if you know what I mean ;)
Just wait and relax for a bit. Nothing will hurt if you don't lay low for a while.
But, if you know for sure he's gay, talk to him slowly, and maybe you can agree on something.

[Mitch4?]

Personally, i would tell him.
If he's such a great friend, he should be able to accept that.
IF you tell him that your mate you're gay, then you've got a much better chance of getting with him.
If you definatly don't want to tell him that, it's best to drop hints and see if he'll be confident enough to come on to you, sleep at each others houses and "play fight" just don't get hard.

[7]

i agree with above, is he is a good friend he should accept that

and attack is the best form of defence, which means hes acting like that because he's probly gay himself..

[Naythi.]

sleep at each others houses and "play fight" just don't get hard.

Sounds like you do it alot ;)
Only joking.

There is nothing wrong with fancying another mate, its normal to like people anyway. I would tell him, its not fair on you or him for you to just hope he likes you if you get me.

Hope everything goes well between you :)

[Ailo Gaup]

Lol, Mitch knows alot.
go with his advice

[today]

Lol, Mitch knows alot.
go with his advice
Thats hardly any advice.

I know alot of my friends play around with each other, nothing sexual. I'm sure you've seen pictures on myspace with these lads grabbing each other as fun and other actions but they are still straight.

I dont wish to burst your bubble or anything.

[Inseriousity.]

Yes you're right Hollywood but I think (in my personal opinion. Not really fact or anything) that those boys are in the early stages of it all and confused about it so they just do it and say they're messing round but are really trying to make themselves positive.

[Ailo Gaup]

:)
but, just flirt around in jokes.

[today]

Yes you're right Hollywood but I think (in my personal opinion. Not really fact or anything) that those boys are in the early stages of it all and confused about it so they just do it and say they're messing round but are really trying to make themselves positive.
Depending how old they are ;]

:)
but, just flirt around in jokes.
No. Were not all like you. :rolleyes:

[leah]

If he is a really good friend then you could tell him you were gay, but only if you completely trust him. Maybe if he knows your gay, he will be more comfertable maybe if he's in the closet? :D

[Alexicles.]

Well, if he blatantly starts coming onto you then he may be Bi-Sexual, but as you say he may just be joking around. :S


Hope this helps!

[kerplunkwozere]

YES THAT WILL HELP LOTS WELL DONE

Edited by Minty (Forum Moderator): Please do not post pointlessly.

[leah]

If he is a really good friend then you could tell him you were gay, but only if you completely trust him. Maybe if he knows your gay, he will be more comfertable maybe if he's in the closet? :D

Pfft you didn't +rep. you Lie. :(

[Hopeless]

Pfft you didn't +rep. you Lie. :(

I quoted good advice and i havent look at this thread for a while so calm down, nd its only rep.. :l


Also additional information:

Was at a house party last night and i kissed him on the neck... he did nothing about it he just asked who kissed me, i was with another girl nd i just went me lol... but he didnt go all akward.. just still being mates.. so its really weird :s

Thanks for all advice aswell :)

[shizzle]

He probably is hiding the gayness wait and see. What kind of stuff is he saying?

[Vegas]

there is a few options u could use,

just go along with it, and see what feels rite.

or come clean, tell him how u feel, if he is a real mate, he will understand and not ditch u, or chuck it back in your face!
You have to be careful how u tell him, and like... how u put it,
not like

*Hey! mate, i love you i think u have been flirting* that may not go down well :p

try summin simple, on your own? like..
" i know i have probs got the wrong idea, but i felt like u flirt with me, and i like u alot ;o"
or summin :P

[Ardemax]

Try to get really good friend relationship first, then start asking him small ammounts of questions in between regular communication.
Should help you find out ;)

[leah]

LOL its cos I have like no rep.

with that additional information,

I'd say he did like you and is hiding it..
but, just incase, you should go along with flirting and stuff, it could lead onto something which will make him not need to say he's gay ;)

[Baby]

Mabye hes just being really friendly. Loads of guys in my school act flirty with other boys as a joke so just see what happens[:

[Ugawa]

Drop slight hints, I wouldn't do anything yet. Most the boys in my school flirt with each other in a jokey way. You wouldn't want to ruin a good friendship.

XX

[:Edzy]

Touch his bum, see how he reacts.

in my opinion its pretty easy to tell how they act with girls and boys etc

he will either not like it and u will tell
he might like it and pretend not to
he might seem like he likes it and does
he might seem like he likes it as a joke

its easy to see

hope all goes well!

[danny-dylan]

Tell him, just not round other people for both your sakes. The thing is, if you continue to carry on as you are, your going to make it much more difficult for yourself and possibly upset yourself about it. If your sure you like him this much tell him privately that way there is no need for him to joke about it as no one will be watching and he wont need to "act" or "showoff". The whole problem of "how do I tell" is going to be with you your entire life and every single guy you like your gonna have to do the same routine over and over again to find out if there is any future for you.

Carrying on as flirty friends is going to make it unfair and hard for you. Tell him, if he reacts like a complete **** (stops being friends) then was he really a decent friend in the first place? If he jumps on you, then congrats and hope you have a great relationship. Just don't start beating yourself up about the entire thing otherwise you are going to start seeing everything he does as a flirt or pass.

[lew!]

make a msn, or something.. and be like
"Hey, i got ur addi from facebook or bebo or something, Ur fit :P.. U gay or bi? ;)"
if he says yeh then. yeah. lol

or at a house party, get him a BIT drunk ( so he still knows whats happening)
and then make a move on him (snog :P or more) and then if he freaks out then be like soz im drunkkkkkkkk lol

[BobX]

idk if you have any lessons with him just like pretend to drop your pencil and then "accidently" brush his leg a couple times or a bit higher etc... this guy tried that on me and i was like... no.

but if he reacts and does it back or u see his soldier stand to attention then you know he wants it.

[Mitch4?]

idk if you have any lessons with him just like pretend to drop your pencil and then "accidently" brush his leg a couple times or a bit higher etc... this guy tried that on me and i was like... no.

but if he reacts and does it back or u see his soldier stand to attention then you know he wants it.

Or maybe he just thought that he was stroking his own leg, and the itch wouldn't go away because it wasnt his leg.

[Slowpoke]

make a msn, or something.. and be like
"Hey, i got ur addi from facebook or bebo or something, Ur fit :P.. U gay or bi? ;)"
if he says yeh then. yeah. lol

or at a house party, get him a BIT drunk ( so he still knows whats happening)
and then make a move on him (snog :P or more) and then if he freaks out then be like soz im drunkkkkkkkk lol

That first idea is really good - I might try that on a few friends as a joke!

[Nain]

just tell them that your gay, be proud of it, just dont go rubbing it in peoples faces as then they'll hate you. If he stops liking you, hes not a true friend

[leah]

Touch his bum, see how he reacts.

made me laugh :D

[today]

Have you done anything?