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View Full Version : A Kids Dream - Episode 1 - First Story!



Lyrical.Troop
08-05-2008, 06:08 PM
[[The scene is set with a boy and his father sitting around a kitchen table eating breakfast ]]

Boy: Dad will you take me to football after school? Its a cup final match!

Dad: Football? FOOTBALL? What a load rubbish! You joined the team, you get there!

Boy: But dad.. Its a cup final!

Dad: I couldnt give a toss if it was the World Cup, Im not taking you, thats that!

[[ The dad slams his spoon into his empty bowl and heads for the sink, The boy slouches in his chair with a tear in his eye]]

Boy: [Mutters under his breathe] If mum was here.. She would take me.

Dad: [shouting violently] Dont start with that, IF MUM WAS HERE CRAP, Dont you think I want your mum here? Dont you think we all do, you selfish ****!

[[ The boy runs up the stairs, abandoning his breakfast, and slamming the door behind him, eyes wet with fresh tears ]]

[[ The Timeline skips 7 years, the boy is now 18 ]]
[[ The scene is taken to a professional stadium, where Manchester United are hosting Liverpool ]]

Dad: [Watching TV, In a scruffy pub, staring at the player with Turner on the back of his shirt] Thats my son.. I always knew one day he would make me proud!

Stranger: [In Dis-belief] What.. Your son? Little Mickey Turner?

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Misawa
08-05-2008, 06:16 PM
I would not get caught up in scripts that are undeveloped and unformatted. Write stories instead or this will never get anywhere creative.

Joshuae
08-05-2008, 06:30 PM
Agree'd ^^ Do a story

FunerealSerap
08-05-2008, 08:00 PM
I think you put an awful lot of emotion into such a small space, and that's really good. It's a good starter for great things to come.

But I do agree with the two above posters. Script writing is very challenging and often gets you no-where unless you're in the business. You'd probably find a lot more satifaction in writing stories, poems, free verse and so one.

Good job on this though. +Rep :)

Misawa
08-05-2008, 10:10 PM
You cannot go anywhere without knowing how to format a screenplay.

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