Funny GTA IV Quotes You've Encountered?

[Niko Bellic]

I was doing that boat mission with Bernie, when you see them big grey boats, I just about slipped in and scrapped the side of a boat, he goes "I like them tight but not that tight" because he's gay, get it? :P

[GhostFace-]

i cant remember any. :(

[Pazza]

Just online, where in party mode the tramps randomly go "Cheesy Vagina" ;l

[Oleh]

Funniest one was on vibe "Hes a puddy slap" my mate says it all the time

[Neil]

"You've been test driving for a long time so you must be interested in something other than the car"
"Yes I'm here to kidnap you"

[Jord]

Niko: Brucie aint your balls F***** Up yet?
Brucie: I Told you NB I dont have funny balls there golden!

[Reptar]

^^
*****

[Josh-H]

Dimitri : "Stop shooting people you maniac!!"

But the above quote was pretty great too.

[Reptar]

^^
I dont really get it.

[mangle]

The way he says it is legendary!

And erm

"Want to eat my weiner?"

[Roboevil]

"Baby as long as I have a face, you'll have somewhere to sit."

[e5]

Nothing new tbh, just swearing lol

[Hiro]

I've encountered a few English quotes.

"Watch me bloody car, mate!"

and I can't remember the other.

(it's only funny if you imagine it in a squeaky Brit accent).

[Wootzeh]

"I'll scratch your eyes out"
"You can scratch my balls if you want" (same mission as Neil's)

[TonyBest]

"Free Cluck Norris toy with every clucky meal"
Thats from Clucking Bell (on a wall)

Terminator 2 reference: "I need your clothes, your boots and your motorbike"

[lew!]

yeah on the boat with bernie:
"i like it tight but not that tight!" LOL

[Fez]

"Your like a moving idiot!"
"I'm an idiot, I move"

and

"Jesus killed people too, he whacked that John the Baptist cat!"
"What are you talking about?"

[GhostFace-]

" why risk your body if their going to grow and hate you an dsteal your money... Buy babies instead"

[Mattster]

lmao listen to the ones on the radio.

[.Raze.]

countless wails of "I'M GOING TO RIP YOUR F***ING HEART OUT!" during multiplayer. :D

[Oleh]

"My Head!!"
is funny because its like miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii heeerrrrrrd

[GhostFace-]

" I Was stuck with an erection for 72 hours "

PMSLLLL

[mangle]

"Slow down neanderthall!"
Lazlow, possibly the greatest Dj on the game.

[hoosiers]

"go suck a bag of *REMOVED*"

Edited by Hitman (Forum Super Moderator): Please don't avoid the filter.

[Supersam]

"You are a virgo, that is why you have a troubled childhood"
"I thought it was because I had a trouble childhood?"
"Of course you did! Because your parents were aliens and you are an alien hunter... and you have a recurring dream an alien fetus comes out your belly.... but you dont know this yet!"

Hahahaha

[shizzle]

"You've been test driving for a long time so you must be interested in something other than the car"
"Yes I'm here to kidnap you"
Lol at the bottom one.

[Misawa]

"Delicious hot dogs... fresh yesterday," and, "They aren't grey when they're cooked,".

[CJW93]

"Ill Rip Your F****** Face Off!"

[j4k3]

''Somebody must want to eat my meat''
''Eww, you pervert!''
''Eh, I'm a'doing my job''

Hot dog vendors. LOL

[Coheed&Cambria]

"Burgers! Fresh yesterday!"

[Youthz]

'Hey Niko, Quit dragging your balls, Il cut them off in a minute you sex starved idiot!'

[Mattch]

" I'LL **** YOUR ******* MOTHERS *******" (on the musem mission that gets u the impossbile trinity achevment)