New poem

[!star--girl!]

Ok, here's another one :)



Nobody wants
To dance with the beautiful girl
Nobody thinks
That she is really beautiful
She runs her tongue across her
painted lips
Touches her hair, and
Smiles from her safe place

Nobody sees
The thoughts of the beautiful girl
Nobody knows
The place where she is hiding
She doesn’t seem to notice as they
All stand back
Her dress slips off her shoulder
She’s dancing on the
Dance floor all alone

Nobody likes
The scars on the beautiful girl
Nobody wants
To see the pain that clearly
She lets them show like patchwork
Foreign patterns on her body
They make a startling contrast
With her sharp stilletto heels

Nobody dares
Get close to the beautiful girl

[kasi]

That stuff is becoming a real cliché now..

I don't really like it sorry.
5/10

[!star--girl!]

Ok... sure..

[Krypsis]

I think its quite nice, and star girl your really trying hard with these poems so im giving 10/10 just for effort :)

[Ferccia]

Great poem :)
It seems very deep =]
10/10 Nicely written! :D

[Owen]

7/10 :I
Dont get it

[!star--girl!]

Thanks, and yes, i am trying very hard, it's hard to write english poems when your dutch, i'm writing a story now :)