Complicated

[Meg.]

This is complicated and frustrating.
Where a relationship clashes with friendship.

I have this guy, we'll call him D, and he's been my best friend for the last 2 and a half years. He met this girl last year who is 3 years younger than him, we'll call her V, and they got on well and now they've been together for 10 months or so. He cheated on her once and since then she's been paranoid. I never get to see him anymore because she doesn't like us spending time together. I miss spending time with him, he was willing to go behind her back to see me but it only makes things worse. He occasionally drives round to my place and we sit in his car talking and stuff but it only lasts for 10-15 mins before he gets a txt asking where he is.

We've had arguements about it, I just want everything back to normal. We had a thing for each other for a week about a year ago and she is paranoid about it.

*sigh* I miss my friendship with him. I've tried to talk to her, but she just wont see sense.

Help?

[5,5]

Lol. may sound cruel but break them up.
Whats he doing with a girl 3 years younger than him anyway.

[MissAlice]

Are you absolutely sure it's only his friendship that you want? Or are you hoping that there is a chance of you two getting together as something more than friends? I may be reading between the lines here, but you pointed out V was 3 years younger than D, as if it was quite important. Are you the same age or closer in age to D?

If I was seeing someone that had cheated on me, (not that I would because I wouldn't give any guy a second chance) I too would be a little jealous of any female friendships with an ex girlfriend. I think that's a natural instinct when trust has been broken.

If you genuinely just miss his friendship, then it's time to find yourself a date hehe, and then arrange to go out with D and V. I can't see how V could object to that ;)

[Meg.]

V hates me lmao, she used to be my best friend. No, I am positive I only want his friendship, anything more is like incest. We never even got together when we had a thing for like a week. It was basically nothing.

Hmm.

[MissAlice]

You probably won't like what I have to say, but put yourself in V's place.

Sadly V sees you as a threat, she is insecure. It will be very hard for her to be convinced that you only want D's friendship. I feel sorry for D to a certain extent, who must be feeling torn between the two of you. Having said that he only has himself to blame.

Not wishing to sound harsh, but you must have other friends. I would give them both some space, and if he truly values your friendship as much as you value his, and the fact that he calls round to see you sounds like he does, he will make the effort to remain good friends with you, don't make it any harder for him by arguing with him, because that's not what true friends do. A good friendship is about being there for one another, understanding and supporting each other, and enjoying each other's company of course :)

[Meg.]

Hmm, I think that's good advice, thanks.

She is insecure about everything and it gets annoying lol. I've given them space, the situation has not changed. I understand why she feels threatened, it's just hard.. Hmm. I was meant to go to some convention thing with him next weekend but then V found out and decided she wanted to go. So there goes our plans.