PDA

View Full Version : [STORY]-[Un-named]



-x-Kerrianne-x-
06-07-2005, 08:19 PM
[CHAPTER ONE]
I was watching as I drained away my black coffee which I was too depressed to drink this morning. I looked in the mirror and found that im not looking back at myself in my reflection. I touch my face and everything seems different than before, my legs feel weak and I can barely stand. I go up into my bedroom to change my blood-stained bed sheets and clothes, I found that I actually had someone else in the house with me that night but in the wrong way. As I opened the cupboard door to change my clothes, I let out a sudden scream of terror as I find that there, lying dead infront of me was a man.

[CHAPTER TWO]
The first thing I wanted to know was, who was he? Where did he come from? And why are my clothes covered in blood? I had no Idea of what went on that night and I dont think I ever will. I go to inform the police but the phone line was dead, my electricity had gone out and my doors were locked from the outside. My heart was beating three times as much as it should be. I could see the picture of the man revolving in my head.

[CHAPTER THREE]
I leapt out of my seat as I heard sudden footsteps above the lounge, directly above the lounge is my bedroom. The only person in my bedroom was the man, the dead man. Surely he couldn't of been walking around upstairs this was probably my imagination playing tricks on me- I hope it is..........

[CHAPTER FOUR]
I screamed to high heaven! as I heard gun shots from upstairs. I was holding my breath as the sounds were getting louder and louder. My legs sounded REALLY loud inside because I could hear them clattering together. A cold chill went down the back of my spine. I Hid underneath the kitchen table, I felt something tickle my neck, I thought they had me so I screamed loudly.

[CHAPTER FIVE]
Fortunately they didn't get me, It was the mop which had fell from its place on the wall next to the table. Unfortunately I had to think of a new hiding place because I had given away my cover from where I was hiding. I hid behind the sofa, two cold boney fingers had tapped my left shoulder. I was too afraid to even turn around to look who it was. I could feel warm air on the back of my neck.....

Rachi
06-07-2005, 08:24 PM
Flippin eck!
Thats rele good :D
+Rep and
10/10
FLLLLLLLLLLIPPPPPIN HELL
That is really good
I was shakin xD

-x-Kerrianne-x-
06-07-2005, 08:27 PM
Lol!! Thanks!! ROFL!

Rachi
06-07-2005, 08:28 PM
What r rolfing about LOL
That was really good!
Get writin another bit ;]
Tip: Write bit by bit because people dont like reading 100 paragraphs strait

-x-Kerrianne-x-
06-07-2005, 08:29 PM
Np! <3
Let me get my thinking cap back on!

Rachi
06-07-2005, 08:35 PM
-Gives thinking cap-

Get workin madame!!

-x-Kerrianne-x-
06-07-2005, 08:38 PM
I have done a little more, I will do some more shortly. I need to get the juices flowing xD

Rachi
07-07-2005, 03:11 PM
Cmon u can do it ;]

-x-Kerrianne-x-
07-07-2005, 03:15 PM
Lol. Afk now :D
Will do more l8tr :)

-=rooty987=-
07-07-2005, 03:57 PM
I'm watching
Present tense

I was too depressed to drink this morning
Past tense

Both in the same line, you have changed the tense throughout this story. I couldn't actually understand what was happening - i guess - he killed a man - but cannot remember - keeps having flash backs - and the guy wakes up from the dead or something.

10/10 for effort
8-9/10 for story.
Love Dan
xxx

Want to hide these adverts? Register an account for free!