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Bun
16-02-2009, 11:40 AM
I haven't really done one of these before, but I need to get it off my chest. Basically my Mam and Dad are annoying me to an extent I feel like running away or something.

I used to be really good at school but it basically failed me at my GCSEs. The school degraded majorly from Year 7 to 11. So I though I'm going to college - fresh start right? Wrong. No matter how hard I try my Mam and Dad never seem to say well done, but always criticize me. I could always do more work, or put more effort in. They're putting my education above my happiness and I hate it. They're saying I have to cut down seeing my girlfriend (i don't see her much nowadays anyway) and work shifts, which I'll come to later.

My girlfriend means the world to me, she makes me the happiest I've ever been. She cares about me, not what I achieve, but she just wants me to be happy. She actually pushes me better towards college than my Mam and Dad do, but they fail to realize that. They think that just because I'm a teenager, I'm always wrong and they're always right. I even prefer being around her house, it feels more of a home to me, I feel more comfortable.

And regarding work, well I just can't wait. Throughout the whole of Year 11 they were nagging me to try and get a job for after my GCSEs, so I managed to get one in July. Now they're telling me to stop working so many hours. Well I'm sorry but I need the money, because they don't supply me with any. They never give me food towards money, clothes or anything. I'm actually going on Holiday abroad for the first time this summer, with my girlfriend. And yes I am buying everything myself, even my passport.

Furthermore, ever had a really smart brother or sister? Sucks doesn't it. They constantly say that they don't compare me to my brother, but they do. My Mam actually says she doesn't want me getting any less than A's for my exams... she's in for a BIG shock. I do try my best at all times, I just find it extremely hard. They claim to just want the best for me, if that was the case then surely they would listen to me. Since I mentioned that I'm thinking about joining the RAF my Mam is happy cos it'll get rid of me. So she wants rid of me now, yet wants me to get all A's in college? Bit of a contradiction there...

That's all I can be bothered to type right now :(

buttons
16-02-2009, 12:49 PM
i've never really had the whole parent and school thing, my mum just tells me to try my hardest but she's too caught up with her boyfriend she doesn't really give a **** at least you have someone looking out for you and your girlfriend that cares for you, so you've basically got two things i haven't ;)

i don't get why they would tell you to get a job then tell you to stop? at least you're learning how to cope with stuff yourself like you're going to have to, paying for everything and not relying on anyone else.

She's being extremely selfish if she has high expectations, my eldest brother managed to get really good grades and didn't go to college and became an alcoholic instead (:rolleyes:) then my other brother who didn't get the best of grades yet went to college and worked hard there, my mum is more proud of him for sure as my other is god knows where :) dunno there's nothing you can really do except tell your mum/dad that you're finding it difficult, get a tutor??

if you only need set grades for RAF why don't you just work for them grades and if you fail any you can just show her what grades you got that will let you in and then she'll have to be happy right?

Bun
16-02-2009, 01:02 PM
i've never really had the whole parent and school thing, my mum just tells me to try my hardest but she's too caught up with her boyfriend she doesn't really give a **** at least you have someone looking out for you and your girlfriend that cares for you, so you've basically got two things i haven't ;)

i don't get why they would tell you to get a job then tell you to stop? at least you're learning how to cope with stuff yourself like you're going to have to, paying for everything and not relying on anyone else.

She's being extremely selfish if she has high expectations, my eldest brother managed to get really good grades and didn't go to college and became an alcoholic instead (:rolleyes:) then my other brother who didn't get the best of grades yet went to college and worked hard there, my mum is more proud of him for sure as my other is god knows where :) dunno there's nothing you can really do except tell your mum/dad that you're finding it difficult, get a tutor??

if you only need set grades for RAF why don't you just work for them grades and if you fail any you can just show her what grades you got that will let you in and then she'll have to be happy right?
thanks :) i wi ll get grades for the raf cos i think you only need 2 a levels for the best jobs anyway but it's just really frustrating lol.

buttons
16-02-2009, 01:06 PM
work hard for it then :P

Charlie
17-02-2009, 05:13 PM
I kind of know how you feel. My parents are telling me they are proud of me one minute and then the next they are crapping all over that and picking at everything I do and I'm getting sick of it.

My advice would be to ignore them because they aren't helping you in any way other to bring you down and contradict themselves by telling you to do one thing and then when you do it, telling you not to. If you are happy with how you are at college/work then why should you let them bring you down about it because if your happy with it then that's all that matters and if you have a girlfriend who is supporting you then you should listen to her because the support will help you a lot more then comments from your parents will.

And as for them comparing you to your brother, you are two completely different people so of course you aren't going to like the same things, be at the same level in school/college so it isn't fair for them to compare you to him.

Barmi
17-02-2009, 07:19 PM
You know as well as I do that no two people are the same, so you really do not need to pay attention to any comparisons that are made. To tell you the truth I didn't put 100% into my GCSEs or A-levels, and it is cringeworthy to hear that I supposedly was so keen and did lots of work. No, I just got lucky in that I didn't need to do a lot.

It's not fair that I comment on here, so I won't. Even after hearing both sides, it's not my place to do so. There is something I would like to mention about A-levels, but I'll tell you when I come home Dan.

See you in a few weeks! Oh, and try to stick Maths out the best you can; not for anyone else but yourself.

Mathew
17-02-2009, 07:28 PM
That was a lot post for you, wasn't it buttons? :P

My parents have always praised me for what I do right and supported me for what I do wrong.
A solution to this would be to see your school teachers after school. If they are anything like my teachers, they will be happy to go over some things you don't understand after school.

Over dinner on a night, tell them that you're having extra classes because you want to make them proud. It sounds cheesy, but once you say it you'll feel better.

Good luck.

J0SH
17-02-2009, 07:29 PM
Personally I think they should give you more food for money.

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