View Full Version : My brothers at Uni now
My brother has been at Uni since September and I love it! Its great at home now because I have more space, and its just nice to be able to talk to him when I want instead of him annoying me or whatever, plus hes really nice to me when he comes to visit.
However, (yeah theres always a however) whenever he comes home to visit Mum and Dads attention is always on him and its really annoying. I dont want the attention he gets, I just want them to listen to what I say and not ignore me. Whenever he comes home on the last night we always go for a meal and this always ends badly. Mum and Dad always ignore me and I end up sitting in silence for the whole thing, they even shouted at me because I was talking to Mum and my brother interrupted and so I made a remark saying that he was being rude and I got shouted at because apparently 'he just made a comment' when actually he just started a new conversation over me!
Hes like the Golden Child and its really annoying. I just want to be noticed. And whenever I tell someone about this they always say I am jealous and Im not - I dont want the attention he gets, I just dont want to have to sit in my room all the time whenever hes home and sit in silence when we eat a meal. Is that too much to ask?
Just remember that you have the rest of the attention whilst hes not there, so when he does come to visit, just let him get some attention whilst hes there ^^
Misawa
21-02-2009, 11:11 PM
Awkward. Talk to your parents right before he comes next time. They're not being malicious or anything - he's their son and they don't get to see him so much now, so naturally they're going to want to converse with him. Don't you get involved with the conversations? If you contributed then you could all have a discussion involving each other?
Melsia
21-02-2009, 11:12 PM
I have a similar problem. Except I miss my brother loads when he's away so I tend to give him lots of attention when hes home too.
He's only home sometimes so I suppose it's natural for your parents to want to give him attention, maybe just put up with it then take your parents attention when hes away?
Awkward. Talk to your parents right before he comes next time. They're not being malicious or anything - he's their son and they don't get to see him so much now, so naturally they're going to want to converse with him. Don't you get involved with the conversations? If you contributed then you could all have a discussion involving each other?
thanks :)
the thing is i dont get involved because when i do, they ignore. so its safe to stay silent, lol :)
Hecktix
21-02-2009, 11:41 PM
Try and be more involved with your brother when he's home, if you're with him you're parents can't ignore you if you're part of the picture.
it's natural. parents worry about their kids when they go to uni and like to know that they're coming on okay.
Try and be more involved with your brother when he's home, if you're with him you're parents can't ignore you if you're part of the picture.
this is the most useful piece of advice and i had really noted it :)
thanks
My brother has been at Uni since September and I love it! Its great at home now because I have more space, and its just nice to be able to talk to him when I want instead of him annoying me or whatever, plus hes really nice to me when he comes to visit.
However, (yeah theres always a however) whenever he comes home to visit Mum and Dads attention is always on him and its really annoying. I dont want the attention he gets, I just want them to listen to what I say and not ignore me. Whenever he comes home on the last night we always go for a meal and this always ends badly. Mum and Dad always ignore me and I end up sitting in silence for the whole thing, they even shouted at me because I was talking to Mum and my brother interrupted and so I made a remark saying that he was being rude and I got shouted at because apparently 'he just made a comment' when actually he just started a new conversation over me!
Hes like the Golden Child and its really annoying. I just want to be noticed. And whenever I tell someone about this they always say I am jealous and Im not - I dont want the attention he gets, I just dont want to have to sit in my room all the time whenever hes home and sit in silence when we eat a meal. Is that too much to ask?
Well you and your family havnt seen him in ages clearly they want to ask about how uni is whats he been up too has he got a girl friend stuff like that/
Pyroka
23-02-2009, 10:03 AM
Deffo a problem, I think go with Oli's advice though as it is the best. You are being a tiny bit selfish though, seeing as he would want to see his parents to and they'd want to see him. It'll be exactly the same when you move away...
Angel-Charlene
23-02-2009, 10:19 AM
Your parents have no idea theyre pushing you out and they will never realise untill you tell them both how you feel. It'll be doing no harm when your brother is back to uni and your at home with the two, sit beside them and say "can I just tell you's something".
Got to realise theyre excited seeing your brother coming home, they miss him, youll understand when your a parent, that letting a child go off is really hard. They can't obv stop him, this is life but it's still hard. Theyve got to do the same with you too.
They already know that your safe and looked after, they just making sure everythings ok with your brother.
To you theyre ignoring you, to them they have no idea. Tell them. I would. I have told my mum many times about my brother speaking to her like if she was a piece of dirt. She tried telling him, boys hey! Specially between 15-18 they think they know it all :)
Hope your ok, don't get yourself down. There's more to life and compared to some people, were the lucky ones.
Anvrew
24-02-2009, 07:40 PM
Jeeze, Hes there for a week.
Let him have some attention. -.-
Imho you sound like a brat :)
Technologic
24-02-2009, 07:56 PM
My sis is moving back in from sheffield as she hated her course so shes starting again at manchester in september.
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