Friend had a miscarriage.

[Nemo]

Now usually im good at logically thinking about a situation and knowing wth to do or say, but with this i just have no idea.

Basically, yesterday i was supposed to go to a friend's house. She's like my closest friend and ive known her since i was little, shes 17. Anyway i texted her what time should i come, no answer, called her, no answer. So i just left it and went on with my day. Anyway this morning i get a text from her saying that shes had a miscarriage, now i didnt even know she was pregnant (she said she had something to tell me so was probs that), and well...yeah. I just had absolutely no idea what to say. I ended up saying the usual im so sorry, u can talk to me if u need to kinda thing.

Anyway she asked me to go to hers today and i really just have no idea what to say or do. I have no idea how to handle it and yeah. I really sorry for her, it was her fault and i suspect she may have had to end up getting an abortion anyway, but still. I dont really know what to say or feel about it

Ugh i dont think any of yall can even help with this just felt like i needed to get it off ma chest. yay for hxf being back.

[Stephen]

Just don't go round there thinking you have to cry your eyes out and stuff cos that's silly

[Nemo]

Yeah i know ill like try and cheer her up, i dont really cry too often :p

[Jake]

Listening to everything is probably the best way to go, She may talk your ear off but she will feel a bit better when she gets everything off her chest to someone she trusts, Jus dont ask silly questions :p

[Andy-]

My advice may not be the best, but I will suggest to go around there but act as if everything was normal as she may nto want to talk about what just happened to her yet and if she does open up to you, you can acknowledge that and comfort her in the way that feels suitable.

or

You could go around to her house and comfort her and tell her that your sorry.

[Nemo]

didnt end up going, her head seems to be all over the place and she just fell asleep as soon as she got back from college. Ill give her some time and yeh

[Andy-]

That seems like a good idea giving her some time.

[Catzsy]

Well her hormones will in a terrible state for a bit after a miscarriage. All you can do is be there for her for as long as it takes. It is pretty impossible to know he she feels.

[Narnat,]

I've sort of gone through the same thing as you but it was my cousin. I think what you need to remember is that she wont be in the best state and maybe not bring up the subject unless she starts on the topic because sometimes talking about it so early isn't the best for some people but best for others. If she does start to talk to you about it listen to what she has to say and you might find she will get emotional and upset so just be there for her which I'm guessing you already are because you are so close to her. Good luck xxx

Oh and I would maybe suggest not to say Sorry about yada yada ya or are you okay because when your in a **** mood when people say that it can make you a bit more upset maybe just give her a hug or something?

[Nemo]

I think she was just rushing to see me for whatever reason but then when it comes to it she just feels sick or whatever and doesnt. I just let her know today that theres no rush and im not going anyway and to text me when she wants to hang out. Tried to keep it light n that.

[Narnat,]

Good Stuffs, I hope everything works out in the end +Rep you totally deserve it

[kuzkasate]

i know a couple of people that made this mistake.

it may sound stupid, but people tend to say this without realising it, in an attempt to comfort the person, just dont say something like 'maybe its for the best that it happened, afterall you were probably going to abort' - it may seem like a good thing to say at the time, but when you say it, it sounds quite bad

[Nemo]

i know a couple of people that made this mistake.

it may sound stupid, but people tend to say this without realising it, in an attempt to comfort the person, just dont say something like 'maybe its for the best that it happened, afterall you were probably going to abort' - it may seem like a good thing to say at the time, but when you say it, it sounds quite bad
Oh god no, im not that dumb aha.

But yeah went to hers yesterday, she seemed fine and was getting ready to go out with her mates. She made a couple jokes about it which was a bit uhmm awkward but just let it pass and her mood still seems all over the place (except with me ehehe :P) and so yeah she seems on the mend. Didnt get to have a proper talk with her coz a couple of her friends were there but hey ho no rush

[kuzkasate]

are you sure your not the father or something?

[Nemo]

are you sure your not the father or something?
Lal nope, im pretty sure i know about how sex works and i dont think we've had it :P