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buttons
14-07-2011, 07:12 PM
wow this is long so i'll bold the part i rly care about

ok basically there are 3 of us who always go out together
i'll call them R and C. R and C are cousins, we only really invite C out because otherwise we have nowhere else to stay lol cause we live far far away from our town, great friends i know but we don't always end up there.. anyways, even just 2 of us together is bad enough but when the 3 of us are it's horrible. i'm no angel when drunk but they are the worst.

the first few times we went out with C, remember she's the only place we can really stay, we ended up at other places because she would **** off with some guy (lol scotland) and leave us at a club or whatever.. so i always say to R that we're not going out unless we deffo have somewhere to stay. C has a bf now (not that that stops her lol), let's call him A, so the 4 of us often go out and C gets jealous of A and R as they're together most the night smoking etc and there's always drama meaning R will run away and A and C will fall out while i'm left in the middle. C is normally really quiet and smart when sober but when she's drunk it's like looking after a baby, she overreacts and cries and blames everyone for everything, before she was with A she would tell us we couldn't stay at hers cause we did something wrong or cause she wanted to **** someone..... then when she's sober you don't even get an apology cause it's so funny obv

so that usually leaves me and R together. now me and R are super close and have been for a long time. but she's bad for ******* off aswell and she acts the victim too. again, this is only on alcohol and to be honest i forget what she's like sober. she gets drunk maybe twice a week but definitely at least once. & when we are sober and just away to the pub all we talk about is the nights we've been out etc but i do love her a lot. We'll be together most of the night but when we start to walk home we'll meet in with people and she'll go missing for 20 minutes (lol you can guess...... :/) and leave me with random people or by myself but as soon as SHE wants to move, if i don't then it's all my fault. like yday she disappeared and i was sat talking to someone and she came out of mcds with people n i said wait 2 mins and she was like "no fine stay with ur friends i'll just go" then will piss off infront of me and tell people around us that i was the one that left her. & u know we kinda have to stay together bc we both live miles away. we either go to a party or to the casino which opens until 8am but very rarely do we end up at C's, not until 5 or 6 am. another thing is she is violent. she's strangled her friend before and blamed it on tequila and she has a habit of slapping me and random guys, not hard but still... & this is only after one drink sometimes. it's only to me, not any other friend because i never retaliate i guess but yesterday i slapped her back for the first time bc i wasn't putting up with it & she was so shocked but was like "oh i'm proud of you, sticking up for yourself" hugging me etc.. why pretend to care when you find it so easy to slap me lollllll she acts like it's no big deal, like i say that's prob because i put up with it. we were with 2 guys when it happened + she told them it was fine because we're friends even though clearly she does not like it happening to her. if they weren't there to hold us back she would have probably slapped me harder and i would leave it at that. we have never properly fallen out over this but if we do argue, the next morning she will laugh about it or just say 'oops' & say she loves me really or whatever else. it's the same as C... like they just laugh. no apology, nothing.

YET WE DO THIS EVERY. SINGLE. WEEKEND. there is not a drama free weekend with us and it's always always their fault yet they find it hilarious. n i do talk to them about it, R always says we have somewhere to stay before we leave but half way there she'll be like "oh we have nowhere to stay its fine we'll find a way" which we do but that's not the point... like they are my friends but it's beyond a joke now. & it's not like i should stop talking to them because maybe they have an alcoholic problem or something, definitely runs in the family but it's more of a personality change than anything. R especially as she can't go a weekend without but doesn't even think about the **** she causes or the fact that i'll have nowhere to stay (i do actually have someone i could go to but they hate each other n im not leaving her even if she'd do it to me) when she goes in a strop. she just wants to get drunk but needs someone to come with her as her safety net. i have spoke to R about it n she doesn't WANT to change her drinking and i feel uptight when i tell to stop slapping me or leaving me while she goes ~talk~ to guys in pissy alleyways. i know that sounds terrible but i don't really have the guts to say anything. despite this she's the closest friend i have and the slapping is only like 5 or 6 times through the night but she's mostly a really affectionate, friendly person sober and drunk but it's as soon as all the clubs close & we TRY to make our way home that the problems occur n ruins the whole night.

anyway i rly just needed to vent but i dont think she'll be doing that again after that haha... sucks cause if i retaliate she will prob go in a strop n leave me agaaaain n C will stick up for her. it's so childish. i find it hard to say no when she asks me to come out. i doubt anything will change cause i cant do much about it other than tell her to stop but if i do she'll be like IM ONLY JOKING!! ha.ha.ha

wixard
14-07-2011, 07:30 PM
can't believe i read all that but oh my god
if any of my friends lay a finger on me i would freak
that's just not right, i don't know anybody who does that it's definitely not normal....

if i were you i'd find another group of people or a girl or someone you know but have never been out with and ask could you go out with them
a change of atmosphere and people would prob do you good and you'll get to see that what's going on between you and your current friends just isn't right....
and you're stuck between them since they're cousins, it's like being in a trio, two of them are always gonna be closer than one and it's not a nice feeling

Inseriousity.
14-07-2011, 07:31 PM
If I was a tv producer, I'd definitely be making Scotland Shore in your town :D

Anyway, as you say they're okay when they're sober so how about when you go out, you arrange somewhere to stay for yourself and then let them two get on with the drama so that you don't have to put up with it. You'll be ditching them but sounds like they both do it to you so when they're sober if they mention it you can just go I LOVE YOU REALLY. If that doesn't work, you really would just have to put your foot down and say "no, don't wanna go out tonight, speak to you tomorrow."

buttons
14-07-2011, 09:13 PM
can't believe i read all that but oh my god
if any of my friends lay a finger on me i would freak
that's just not right, i don't know anybody who does that it's definitely not normal....

if i were you i'd find another group of people or a girl or someone you know but have never been out with and ask could you go out with them
a change of atmosphere and people would prob do you good and you'll get to see that what's going on between you and your current friends just isn't right....
and you're stuck between them since they're cousins, it's like being in a trio, two of them are always gonna be closer than one and it's not a nice feeling
lol it's just after it being done so frequently and as though it's not a big deal it makes it feel the norm. i don't think i'd ever slap my friends even in self defence and i don't remember what happened yesterday, well today (got my drink spiked, lovely) but she must have slapped me really hard to make me do it back to her. it's usually a slap with the back of her hand so it wouldn't really bring attention to other people, no-one ever notices her do it but as soon as i did it to her it was suddenly a massive deal. she was slapping the guy next to her A LOT and she does it to get a reaction out of them or asks them to do it back to her. not sure why, either attention or she likes that ****. thinking bout it C has slapped one of our mates too..

yeah i keep getting asked to go out with someone from here and i keep blowing her off to hang out with R in aberdeen but when i go out with this mate there is never drama and if there is i can go home cause we always stay at our local pubs. im out with her, few other people and C and her bf are coming along and staying at her parent's on saturday. R won't be there & i can tell there won't be any trouble as we're at home. i've been out with people from college a few times in aberdeen (this is where C lives n where everythings open after 3am but unfortunately 50 miles from my town) and never ever had drama, there is one who disappears but she says where she's going and she's not a ***** about it. so maybe it's just R, i know both her and C cry/argue when they're together without me & when out with other friends (like i said R strangled her mate) and R has ended up going to random people's. i don't want to totally blow them off obviously but maybe i could spend less with those who treat me like **** & more with people who i can actually enjoy going out with. problem is i love aberdeen n staying out wayyy after club times too much

If I was a tv producer, I'd definitely be making Scotland Shore in your town :D

Anyway, as you say they're okay when they're sober so how about when you go out, you arrange somewhere to stay for yourself and then let them two get on with the drama so that you don't have to put up with it. You'll be ditching them but sounds like they both do it to you so when they're sober if they mention it you can just go I LOVE YOU REALLY. If that doesn't work, you really would just have to put your foot down and say "no, don't wanna go out tonight, speak to you tomorrow."
they are ok sober but R gets excited & aggressive after one drink lmao. yeah like i said i have a friend i could go to but nowadays C goes home for 12 and before she started dating her bf she would disappear around 1 whereas me and R go out until 5/6/7 so it would be unfair for me to turn up to someone's at that time :P (C doesn't mind if we go to hers at any time). + that's another reason we always go out to town instead of staying here because everything's open longer than 3am lol. oh my god if you saw my facebook, i DREAD seeing that she posted on my wall. "coming out?" -20 comments later- "please i'll get us to stay somewhere, no tequila" bc she says it's tequila which makes her aggressive. she's aware of the way she acts but does nothing to stop it. i wasn't going to go out the past 2 times but she's said we have somewhere to stay and ~contacts~ just incase then all of a sudden the girl whos place we're staying (usually her mate 'S') at isn't coming out so yerrr then we end up going out with C instead and staying there after drama ;l

lol

Andeeh
14-07-2011, 10:38 PM
Sounds pretty ******, I have a mate that is so aggressive when drunk, he's punched lamp-posts started on one of our mates as he told him to sort his life out, he's such a safe mate but when drunk you don't know whether he is going to turn on you but luckily we rarely go out drinking except this weekend is GuilFest so we will be haha.
If I were you I would still keep in contact with these people but maybe try and do something that doesn't involve drinking all the time as it seems that this is where the trouble lies. Also see your mate that lives near ya and don't feel the need to go out with R all the time :)

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