help me i'm desperate

[T@R]

right i don't know who to turn to so i'll ask you lot cos i can't tell people in real life or i'll get judged...
to keep it simple, i'm seeing this girl ( A ) and have been for about 2/3 weeks now, so it's like early doors of the 'relationship' and then on friday i got chucked out my house
this other girl (B) was having a party anyway and she said i could stay
so yeah i got really drunk and ended up sleeping with B and we've both agreed to keep it a secret
so yeah should i tell A?
is it worth risking a potential relationship?
like honestly i know a lot of you will just be like you shouldn't have done it so now bare the consequences, which is true, but nobody will ever find out and by telling her surely i'm doing her more harm telling her
and it's not an official relationship yet either
so anyone?

[RyRy]

if you call her your girlfriend or she calls you her boyfriend, then you're in the wrong and you should consider coming clean. if it's just a casual seeing eachother and seeing how it goes then no need to tell her.

[T@R]

yeah i don't call her my girlfriend but i dunno whether in like a week that'd be the same cos we've slept together and she said she only sleeps with people she likes
and i do like her too but i think telling her would just cause unnecessary problems...

[Rozi]

like ryan said, if you haven't made it official and you never had a conversation about seeing other people then no need to tell her really unless she expressly asks you or she tells you she did something with someone else

[Lee]

If it was an accident and you regret, I dont see why you should risk the early relationship. However, if there is any chance of her finding else through anybody else you should brake it to her yourself. Of course, your call when it comes down to it!

[Catzsy]

Less said the better I feel. Mistakes do happen but I would just try and forget about it and not worry. :)

[T@R]

like ryan said, if you haven't made it official and you never had a conversation about seeing other people then no need to tell her really unless she expressly asks you or she tells you she did something with someone else
nah we have spoken about that and we did agree that we weren't gonna get with other people...
and i saw her today and in a joking way she said 'how many girls did you **** on friday?'

[Rozi]

oh well crap you're in a bit of a sticky situation
basically if she finds out somewhere along the line you can pretty much kiss your good relationship goodbye
if you tell her now there may be a chance that she doesn't mind but also it might be the total end

depends on her really; if she's paranoid, if she's had relationships where she has been cheated on before, if she is a trusting person, how bad she thinks cheating is etc

maybe the fact she asked you how many you slept with on friday is a bit of a sign that she is a bit worried, despite it being a joke.


There isn't really a simple answer, if girl B is trustworthy and you're sure no one else knows then I wouldn't tell her.

[Phil]

If this is a 'potential relationship' don't you think it'd be better telling her now before ye get into a serious long-lasting relationship?

[Casanova]

I don't have a clue why all of you are saying "tell her"?

Don't, just leave it. you're young and it happens.

[Cerys]

Tbh I wouldn't tell because the relationship could go somewhere, but you have to face the fact she may find out oneday, as B could tell her, or someone may get drunk at a party and it just slips out.

[Meanies]

if you dont tell her and it comes out sometime in the future it's going to have much more of an effect on your relationship than if you tell her now. would you be able to go on knowing that you've done something wrong and betrayed her since you both said you wouldn't sleep with anyone else? and the comment she made about how many girls did you sleep with, it may have seemed jokingly but i dunno, i'd say she might know something about the situation

[Ostinato]

right i don't know who to turn to so i'll ask you lot cos i can't tell people in real life or i'll get judged...
to keep it simple, i'm seeing this girl ( A ) and have been for about 2/3 weeks now, so it's like early doors of the 'relationship' and then on friday i got chucked out my house
this other girl (B) was having a party anyway and she said i could stay
so yeah i got really drunk and ended up sleeping with B and we've both agreed to keep it a secret
so yeah should i tell A?
is it worth risking a potential relationship?
like honestly i know a lot of you will just be like you shouldn't have done it so now bare the consequences, which is true, but nobody will ever find out and by telling her surely i'm doing her more harm telling her
and it's not an official relationship yet either
so anyone?

This is a tricky one.

Ultimately you need to weigh up the pro's and con's of whether you think it would be worse if you told her straight and was honest about it with her, or if she does end up finding out from someone else other than you... Although this girl says she will keep it a secret what if she tells a close mate? Who then tells their close mate and it goes on until girl A eventually finds out?

I know I would rather hear it from the horses mouth to be honest...

However on the other hand it is the early doors of the relationship and may come to nothing and could have been forgotten about. Ultimately no-one can tell you what to do, but will you be able to continue happily in the relationship with the guilt of knowing what you did?

[Vinnie:Safety]

i had this same situation, and i decided not to tell "A"
She found out anyways.

Honestly, tell "A" what happened if she loves you, and all is ok afterwards, then you two are meant to be together for more time, if not then she's not the "one"

[T@R]

if she loves me already i'd be a bit weirded out
but thank you all for your replies
i've decided to not tell her and hope it doesn't come out
although a few people have already asked me today in school, but i'll continue to deny it
the only good thing is she only knows like 2 people from my college and they're both like more friends with me than her so wouldn't tell her

[Meanies]

if she loves me already i'd be a bit weirded out
but thank you all for your replies
i've decided to not tell her and hope it doesn't come out
although a few people have already asked me today in school, but i'll continue to deny it
the only good thing is she only knows like 2 people from my college and they're both like more friends with me than her so wouldn't tell her

if people are questioning you about it already, then it must be out in the open, so she's going to find out one way or the other

[T@R]

yeah but the amount of stupid rumours that come out of my school i can easily just deny it
and she barely knows anyone from my school so i can't see how she'd find out
i'm just gonna hope she doesn't, and if she does then i'll expect to get slapped

[Vinnie:Safety]

yeah but the amount of stupid rumours that come out of my school i can easily just deny it
and she barely knows anyone from my school so i can't see how she'd find out
i'm just gonna hope she doesn't, and if she does then i'll expect to get slapped

good luck kid.
but you should do the right thing, be a man :P