Too young to have all these items?

[MKR&*42]

Hii.

It's my half-sister's birthday today and I've known that for ages she's wanted... oh an endless list of electrical items - laptop, tablet, brand new phone, new tv etc. And I've been really sceptical about her ever gaining any of those items (mainly because she's 11...) because I just don't see the point. She only uses my mum's laptop for about 1/2 hours a day to play online games and sometimes end up in chat rooms (I've caught her before and shouted at her because of the whole privacy issue), she doesn't need a phone because she speaks to everyone either at school or in our street... a new tv, they never use their current one except for DVDs and a tablet I don't even know why.

Today, my mum gave her a tablet as a present and my mum's friend has bought her a new phone (it's only like a BlackBerry though so it will be crap according to most people on this forum :P) and I just don't think it's right. Lord knows how much my mum and her friend spent on the presents on something that my half-sister doesn't even need? I just think it's a bit silly to get a phone at that age...no?

Probably should mention she's a VERY materialistic girl (so is my other half-sister who's 10). That's down to the fact my ex-Stepdad and mum spoiled her rotten in the past and it turned her into such a brat. She's so uptight when she can't get her way and my mum always gets her gifts/lets her have her way just to cheer her up and she's clearly cottoned onto this, so she manages to get her own way with almost everything now.

It's bad enough now that she wants a Facebook account, I had to be stern with my mum in the car about why she shouldn't be getting Facebook at 11, and ofc my half-sister got all stroppy again over it.
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Oh I rambled sorry. Don't you think a) it's a bit silly she wants/gets a phone and a tablet (or w.e) at 11... (Actually her first phone is from age 10) and b) completely irritating that she's so materialistic and my mum does **** all about it. It's one of the reasons I dislike her, she just fails to grasp how much money these things cost and how little she needs them... I know she's only 11 but still.

[dbgtz]

Lol that is ridiculous, I still remember the amazement around year 5 where someone would get a crappy, second hand Nokia and everyone would just be totally gobsmacked by it. It is silly she wants all of these items, but it's worse that she gets them with such ease.

[buttons]

i think it's absolutely ridiculous, i have a friend whose kids have a camera, laptop, ipod, mobile etc each and they're 5 and 7 year old girls :S what do they need it for? my sister-in-law asked us for advice, her son wanted an xbox for his 8th birthday and me and my brother both said no whereas everyone else was saying they saw nothing wrong with it. i think these things should be shared as a family and not given out to one/every person but i guess there isn't much presents you can actually give kids nowadays...

[Stephen]

i thought you were gonna list a load of sex toys or something

[MKR&*42]

Lol that is ridiculous, I still remember the amazement around year 5 where someone would get a crappy, second hand Nokia and everyone would just be totally gobsmacked by it. It is silly she wants all of these items, but it's worse that she gets them with such ease.

If my mum and (ex) stepdad had stopped it whilst she was still young and not just handed her everything, then I imagine she wouldn't have turned out this way. She's been acting like a stubborn teen since she was 10... and it's just horrific that my mum gives in so quickly to it. They hate it when I have to look after them because they know I don't let them get their way with everything.

Haha, people used to obsessed with those phones :P


i think it's absolutely ridiculous, i have a friend whose kids have a camera, laptop, ipod, mobile etc each and they're 5 and 7 year old girls :S what do they need it for? my sister-in-law asked us for advice, her son wanted an xbox for his 8th birthday and me and my brother both said no whereas everyone else was saying they saw nothing wrong with it. i think these things should be shared as a family and not given out to one/every person but i guess there isn't much presents you can actually give kids nowadays...

Did she get him the xbox in the end? I hope not... 8 year old kids don't need an xbox really considering (from my experience of speaking to others) apparently most games for xbox/ps3 are aimed at teens+ anyway. Only thing shared in our family is the wii, it just causes so many arguments if my sisters are asked to share. Both want full control.


i thought you were gonna list a load of sex toys or something

Haha, been waiting all day for your reply to this :P

[chantellehugs]

Think it's silly really, if you give your child everything that they want you're teaching them absolutely nothing about valuing their belongings. When I was young I had to wait if I wanted something expensive (waited a year for my iPod when I was 15/16) but it made me appreciate and value the things way more than if I had of asked and gotten them right away.

[@K]

I disagree with her getting a tablet most definitely, but at 8 years of age (currently 21), I saved up some money from my birthday or whatever and went and bought a mobile, Trium Mars, now THAT was a mobile, but then again, I did things that kids these days don't do, you know, go out and play on the streets and in parks...

[MissAlice]

Sounds to me like your step sisters expect a lot.

Giving children everything they want doesn’t allow them to fully gain an understanding of values or appreciation, nor does it prepare or teach them on how to have goals and achieve them. Wanting and needing are two different things. There are many things I want, although most I don’t really need. Apart from money ;)

Your mum gives in too easily, probably to be the perfect step mum, (she sounds lovely) whereas what she should be doing is speaking with their father, to find ways to reward special achievements, and regular pocket money for chores around the home. That way they can save for what they really really want.

Btw I would like a new car, but I don't really need it :)

[Metric1]

saw it wanted it threw a fit got it!!!!~

[Sharon]

I agree that she shouldn't demand that much but I got my iPod Touch when I was 12 (I think?) so I won't be a hypocrite because that's all I got that year, since if I chose many different presents it might of come to just under the price of an iPod anyway so in reality it's the same amount of money spent. My brother got the same present 6 months later for his Birthday, he was 9 I think? He was pretty jealous of seeing me with one... Yeah you can totally judge my mum and her *+*irresponsible+*+ actions for doing that but once again, that's all he got. I think it's getting to the years where all people want is electrical items instead of lego and Barbie dolls. The year before that, he only asked for money and bought himself a new DS, I don't see a problem with that.

[Andeeh]

that seems mad, im 18 and only got first laptop for christmas last year, never had a decent phone either £15 one atm, I have a mate who was always getting spoilt as a kid and it makes them ungrateful as well as really bad mannered.

[e5]

Kids having phones at that age is stupid. I can't remember when I had a phone, but my mum used to send me out with the ****test phone going, just so she could ring me when it was tea time or getting late, I don't think I ever got credit as she relied on her ringing me and I'd answer. Having a blackberry with all that capability is pointless. I used to contact all my friends at school and on the street or organise for them to come round for tea at my house or theirs at school. None of this Facebook stuff. Having a tablet also seems pointless!

Thats just how it is now though...

[Shar]

This is the digital age, it is to be expected. Most of us grew up even before the arrival of flatscreen computers/tv's. As technology develops kids will want more but it's all they know.

[GoldenMerc]

i remember when i had a phone at 11... didn't have anyone to text yet a really expensive phone...

[Jurv]

i can't see what's wrong with having a phone, it's not like she can do anything wrong with it. well, apart from break it but that would be her own fault if that happened. the same goes for an xbox. you can buy quite a few games which children can play at the moment, especially with the new kinect. :P

[Inseriousity.]

It's rather sad that kids are being introduced to technology so young and parents need to set some boundaries to allow them to enjoy some childhood. I had a PS1 at an early age and we played the classics like spyro and crash bandicoot and croc and I don't remember any boundaries yet somehow we knew we couldn't spend all our days indoors. We went outside, we had adventures in the woods and did all the usual kids stuff so it's sad when I see 6-7 year olds glued to their phones and ipads. Then again, I also think this "KIDS ARE STUCK INDOORS, GLUED TO THEIR CONSOLES" is a huge generalisation as I often see kids doing exactly what I said I did when I was that age so I think it's possibly old people worrying too much as well.

It seems you've got a spoilt brat on your hands. I remember being selfish and a brat at that age so she'll either grow out of it (like me, yes honest I did!) or get even worse.

[Shar]

It's rather sad that kids are being introduced to technology so young and parents need to set some boundaries to allow them to enjoy some childhood. I had a PS1 at an early age and we played the classics like spyro and crash bandicoot and croc and I don't remember any boundaries yet somehow we knew we couldn't spend all our days indoors. We went outside, we had adventures in the woods and did all the usual kids stuff so it's sad when I see 6-7 year olds glued to their phones and ipads. Then again, I also think this "KIDS ARE STUCK INDOORS, GLUED TO THEIR CONSOLES" is a huge generalisation as I often see kids doing exactly what I said I did when I was that age so I think it's possibly old people worrying too much as well.

It seems you've got a spoilt brat on your hands. I remember being selfish and a brat at that age so she'll either grow out of it (like me, yes honest I did!) or get even worse.
I find that conclusion a tad bit unfair. I understand why you say it but I don't know many kids that don't want what she wants from a young age. I bet the generation before ours feels the same about us haha

[AsFastAsYou]

My mums also like this, my sister who's not long turned 7 got an iPhone. For my birthdays I get an lg cookie (lol that was last phone she brought me) I think it is ridiculous that young girls are getting such good things at a young age, no wonder they are all smoking and stuff by the age of 13.

[Inseriousity.]

It wasn't intended as a 'back in my day' point. More that young children are often incredibly self-motivated and selfish, thinking about what they want, how they are going to get it and how to twist the adults in their lives round their little fingers to do so. Perhaps not the cute, innocent stereotype of young children we normally get and perhaps it may just be because of my own experience as the above (crying to get my own way was my forte) rather than a valid interpretation of childhood psychology. It's not to say that I think they're wrong. On the contrary, I agree that it is perfectly natural and also natural that they will grow up and be socialised into, at the very least, being modest about wanting all the time (even if they are lying to be considered socially acceptable and fit in).

[Recursion]

The main issue here is that a lot of parents aren't up to determining what certain bits of technology do or how they work, whereas the current and future generations do. I think as we (the more tech savvy generations) get older, we'll see more of this type of thing, but with more boundaries and controls established.

I don't see why an 11 year old needs a tablet or a mobile phone, a netbook or something? maybe.

[MKR&*42]

I've got the energy to reply now :P


It's rather sad that kids are being introduced to technology so young and parents need to set some boundaries to allow them to enjoy some childhood. I had a PS1 at an early age and we played the classics like spyro and crash bandicoot and croc and I don't remember any boundaries yet somehow we knew we couldn't spend all our days indoors. We went outside, we had adventures in the woods and did all the usual kids stuff so it's sad when I see 6-7 year olds glued to their phones and ipads. Then again, I also think this "KIDS ARE STUCK INDOORS, GLUED TO THEIR CONSOLES" is a huge generalisation as I often see kids doing exactly what I said I did when I was that age so I think it's possibly old people worrying too much as well.

It seems you've got a spoilt brat on your hands. I remember being selfish and a brat at that age so she'll either grow out of it (like me, yes honest I did!) or get even worse.

Oh my God, Spyro and Crash Bandicoot takes me back!!! (Although I don't remember much about the games because I didn't play them that often). I think I played Croc when I was like 13 though lol 8-) (Loads of PS1 Games at my grandparents house for some reason, I don't remember ever asking for them nor my sisters so goodness knows how they accumulated them).

Haha, were you really like that? You don't seem like it at all Mike (even though I only know you via the internet :P). I *hope* she grows out of it, but she already acts... in a sense 'mature' and she's definitely behaving like the stereotyped teenager I suppose. I fear that she'll be one of the girls in secondary school that is stuck up, stubborn and quite demanding. It's a shame schools have so little control over children these days because the problem is simply escalating, arrogance prevailed so much amongst students in my year and it was horrid to see that a teacher could do very little about it - sending a child out the class stops the disruption but will never remove the arrogance.

I genuinely hope she doesn't become one of the ******* who looks down upon everyone and is constantly moody =/ I don't want to be around that lol.


i can't see what's wrong with having a phone, it's not like she can do anything wrong with it. well, apart from break it but that would be her own fault if that happened. the same goes for an xbox. you can buy quite a few games which children can play at the moment, especially with the new kinect. :P

For some reason she hasn't begged for an Xbox/Ps3/any other games console and I can't figure out why. She seems to simply been encased in a world where phones/tablets/laptops are her greatest importance. Ultimately, there is no GREAT harm in her having a phone (with the only possibility being her breaking it like you said) but it was really a waste of money IMO. She's barely going to text anyone who doesn't live on her street, and by the time she's at the age in which she'll be texting a lot more people from school, she'll be demanding a new phone. So I just think it was a waste of money on something that wasn't a necessity? :(


Sounds to me like your step sisters expect a lot.

Giving children everything they want doesn’t allow them to fully gain an understanding of values or appreciation, nor does it prepare or teach them on how to have goals and achieve them. Wanting and needing are two different things. There are many things I want, although most I don’t really need. Apart from money ;)

Your mum gives in too easily, probably to be the perfect step mum, (she sounds lovely) whereas what she should be doing is speaking with their father, to find ways to reward special achievements, and regular pocket money for chores around the home. That way they can save for what they really really want.

Btw I would like a new car, but I don't really need it :)

They're my half-sisters and we all have the same mother haha. It's the step-dad that differs :P (I have a different father to both of them and unfortunately don't know mine). They don't speak to their step father anymore because *I believe* my mum went into a legal battle to try and lose his right to seeing them (he was originally entitled to weekends but something must have happened that I wasn't informed of) and it worked out for her. Trying to speak to him about raising kids properly, is like trying to speak to a brick wall anyway :P

They do earn money for doing stuff around the house now and then, and my mum often gives them money on occasions but it just doesn't seem to be "enough". I know they're only 10 and 11, but they should ideally be taught about the benefits of saving up money (because I'm 90% sure she can own a bank account with Natwest at 12) instead of wasting it on non-important, materialistic goods.


This is the digital age, it is to be expected. Most of us grew up even before the arrival of flatscreen computers/tv's. As technology develops kids will want more but it's all they know.

I suppose it is to be expected, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't try and stop it from overruling children's lives? :P I genuinely wish I hadn't been so crazily addicted to my laptop throughout 13/14/15 (yes I'm the hypocrite now :o) years of age because it destroyed my social life really. I don't want them clinging onto materialistic goods over friends or potentially education :(.

[Catchetat]

they should earn/deposit the $ before getting any of these items. I only have a laptop and an old nokia phone! you feel a lot happier when u actually spend ur own $ rather than the parents.

[wiktoria]

i had a laptop when i was 11 but it was like a family laptop or smin dno.
my cousins are so spoilt it's ridiculous. she's like 8 and has an xbox, a wii, and a laptop laptop and she doesn't even use any of it i don't even know why she's got it. my other cousin got an ipad for his birthday and he's 11 i think he actually uses it and plays games on it but it annoys me how they have all that **** and never play on it.
i think it's ok to get an xbox or something if you're actually gonna use it but it bugs me when you don't and just want it because it looks cool

[mrwoooooooo]

would you have been complaining if it was you receiving the gifts ? no. jealousy ;)

[MKR&*42]

would you have been complaining if it was you receiving the gifts ? no. jealousy ;)

Was waiting for someone to say 'jealousy'. I wouldn't have been complaining greatly, but I wouldn't have demanded the gifts? I already feel bad anyway when people give me stuff because I don't like people spending money 'on me' (which is why I don't ask for gifts at Xmas or my Birthday :L).

[Charz777]

I got my first phone at 11. Nokia 3410 ftw :P

My cousins are the same, but to be honest they are spoiled. One got a DS at 6, the other just turned 10 and has an iPhone. I've never even had an iPhone :P The 10 year old also has her own laptop and DS, and their dad had a PS3 which is technically the 6 years old's. It's pathetic. At 6 I still played with dolls and at 10 I played on my street on my bike or something with the neighbouring children.

Meh :/