Engagement is not just a Facebook status!

[peteyt]

Why is that today's youth seem to think Engagement is just a Facebook status, just a normal status without any real meaning.

I mean I've seen loads of people being engaged at times I'd call too early but today I noticed something. Someone I talk to on and off had split up with their boyfriend who I believe she might have been engaged to - They split late December early January and a week and a half ago she started dating someone else. About a week ago she then became engaged.

Obviously if people want to do it then fair enough but it does both annoy me and also make me laugh. To me engagement is a commitment. Dating is just really dating, and while you might at the time feel like you want to/could spend the rest of your life with the person, or at least hope you do, it's early days, your just learning about this person, finding out stuff including if you are compatible. To me engagement is something that should only be considered after at least a year, but I'd go as far as 2 years upwards. To me it's the stage when you've learnt everything about each other, you've lasted a while, and realise that this is the person you want to settle down with. I just feel to most it's lost its meaning, it's just another status on Facebook.

Sorry was in a ranting mood ha

Thread moved here by Bolt660 (Forum Moderator): From 'Discuss Anything' As its more suited here.

[Bails]

tl;dr most.

loads of my friends ask for 'facebook marriages' - mainly girls - and it doesn't have any meaning, you're right, idk why people do it but it seems like engagement, in this day and age, means best friend.

[Icemaniceice]

It makes me really mad when people say that they are married or engaged to people when they really aren't. It's really stupid that people do that. I wish people could be punished for playing around with that, but unfortunately there is no of telling if they are lying or not.

[Rozi]

lol

calm your jets guys
facebook is not real life
it doesn't effect you

[buttons]

i saw someone propose to his girlfriend of about 3 months in Facebook but also saying "you should have told me you cheated though" lol anyway I don't really care, look at elderly people now who got engaged young and have stayed married for decades, don't think it matters if you sleep with someone on the first date or get engaged early, if you're perfect for each other do whatever you want
i don't get annoyed or mad cause what others do with their life shouldn't and doesnt affect me

[mrwoooooooo]

its their life, so it has nothing to do with you

[Icemaniceice]

lol

calm your jets guys
facebook is not real life
it doesn't effect you

But it's suppose to be real life, employers treat it as such.

[GommeInc]

It's odd but nothing to care about really. Whatever floats their boats :P

[Rozi]

But it's suppose to be real life, employers treat it as such.

it's not 'supposed' to be anything
it's a personal page for an individual to use as they wish
it's their choice to represent themselves as they wish

[GommeInc]

it's not 'supposed' to be anything
it's a personal page for an individual to use as they wish
it's their choice to represent themselves as they wish
Precisely. If an employer spies on a person's Facebook account and assumes they will act exactly the same as their e-personality then the employer has a really serious HR problem on their hands.

If they do the job well, treat their customers and superiors with respect then that's all that matters. Spying shows a lack of trust, and a lack of trust is just as bad as privately bad mouthing the company / employer.

[Samantha]

I'm not really fussed, what made me wonder is why people care so much about 'Facebook official' I got told that me and my current boyfriend should wait a couple of months but I see no point? If I'm in a relationship with someone I'm not exactly going to leave it as single, I've had 'Facebook marriages' but that was to say we were dating that no one knew and it only occurred for about a couple of days. Doesn't affect me what people do, two of my friends recently got engaged apparently and I found out through Facebook, they're properly engaged though. If it comes to it and I was engaged I'd probably put it on Facebook, same as I would do if I was married, I see no reason to lie but some may just want to do that; it's up to them at the end of the day though.

[Kardan]

If people want to have fake relationship statuses, let them be :P

As for people who do get engaged very quickly, I'm not keen on the idea, but it's their life. I feel like I could easily get engaged any time now really, I'm in the right place in my life for that really. I think that a relationship for 3 years, 7 months isn't too soon. But the only reason that probably puts me of getting engaged is the fact that people would judge me for being too young.

[Inseriousity.]

All it is really is an inside joke so finding it weird or odd is simply because you're not aware of the joke. Don't see it as anymore than that. As for assuming it's a new thing of the younger generation, older people do it all the time when they socialise. I've seen it all the time, things like "we're like an old married couple haha" etc.

As for the time of engagement, I think there is no golden time where everything becomes clear. My parents had a long engagement, there seems to be this idea that once you're engaged, you need to rush into the marriage but engagement can be as long as you both want it to be so it doesn't matter too much if it's rushed engagement or takes forever!

[dirrty]

lol why do u think ur opinion even matters. you ain't involved so let ppl do whatever THEY desire. it nah effect u

[lawrawrrr]

I know someone who recently just got engaged on facebook, she's 19 and been dating her boyfriend for 2 and a half months. I do think that facebook 'engagements' are being misused considering the seriousness of it. If you take away the whole facebook situation (which influences relationships full stop), then I do think engagements are becoming less important; I'm obsessed with Jane Austen and the whole idea of courtship and engagements is lovely to me. There's no difference these days between marriage, engagement or dating, it's so superfluous these days. It's just a status, not necessarily a Facebook status, but a LIFE status.

I don't believe in marriage (for myself) but it's something I do respect for other people, it just annoys me when people throw the word around; like on Jeremy Kyle when they're perfectly happy to leave their fiancees for the tiniest things, surely they can't be serious about the other person and marriage if they'll easily be able to leave them.

To be fair though, it's up to the individual, and whatever they choose they can. What I posted before is obviously my personal views but they can do whatever they want; most of the time I won't judge those people because it is their life, but it's not something I'd want for myself.

[karter]

there is a guy in my school who started dating a girl WHO IS 13 YEARS OLD. I am not even kidding, she is actually 13. So one day I open up facebook and I see that they are apparently engaged..

[Teabags]

i want to be engaged.
after reading this I feel alone.

[Zak]

Alot of young people are getting engaged now and it has no meaning. Some people do it just for bragging rights on Facebook which really does piss me off :P

I wish they'd remove relationship status from Facebook tbh.

[Glen Coco]

so you're saying that she was engaged after 3 days?

at the end of the day, most people have 'married' someone on facebook once. probably when they were younger but nonetheless. the only irritating thing is when couples who clearly don't get on are constantly changing their relationship status to 'engaged' - 'single' - it's complicated, every few hours / days but even then, you simply put them on the setting where you don't see their changes. there's no reason that you need to get annoyed, if someone wants to get engaged after a short time then it's up to them. whether it'll last or not is something that only they need to worry about.
at the end of the day, they probably aren't engaged, they just want to see people's reactions by changing it, and by getting annoyed you're giving a reaction.

[Special]

you need to take it with a pinch of salt, if they're under the age of 18 chances are they are trying to be funny

[e5]

Fb marriages / engagements are mostly just a couple who are seeing each other's way of saying theyre seeing each other.

[Ekelektra]

I didn't really mind before but now I always wonder about how truthful it is, because one girl on my Facebook changed her relationship status to engaged and I didn't really take notice, until she posted pictures of her engagement ring.

In my opinion getting engaged isn't something you should take lightly, and this girl gets engaged after knowing her fiance for 5 months. I'm not saying she's stupid for doing so but for me 16 is too young to be thinking about getting married to someone you've known for less than half a year. So now whenever someone gets Facebook engaged I always wonder if it's serious and then think how if it is, how young they are to be engaged. But then again it is their life and if they feel that they love that person enough to get engaged then that's their choice. Many people get engaged young and stay together for decades, it's just not something I'm in to, and for me 5 months is just not long enough to know if you want to be with that person forever.

[peteyt]

Just to add while it doesn't annoy me as such it does make me feel bad about todays people. Also as I talk to this person on and off I won't be surprised if she'll come crying to me when it ends then rush head first into another engagement

[Rachel]

Well I know someone who has been engaged since 6 years now and they are not married. It doesn't mean once they get engaged they will marry right away. Although you need to commit a bit more since it's starting to be serious.

I am engaged with my boyfriend since last year and still am today as it is no rush really. I rather live day by day and not regret it later on. Facebook status like this can be seeking attention or could be real.

[Charz777]

If people want to have fake relationship statuses, let them be :P

As for people who do get engaged very quickly, I'm not keen on the idea, but it's their life. I feel like I could easily get engaged any time now really, I'm in the right place in my life for that really. I think that a relationship for 3 years, 7 months isn't too soon. But the only reason that probably puts me of getting engaged is the fact that people would judge me for being too young.

^^ And people wouldn't take us seriously, we'd be seen as one of those childish couples who gets engaged while they're still at school (university) and it won't last. And, yes, it's stupid to be bothered about what everyone else thinks because it's quite clear that we're a lot more mature and serious about our relationship than some of the engaged couple we see on Facebook, but we want to be taken seriously even if it does mean waiting.