Would you ever be able to cope with a disabled child?

[myles]

This includes many disabilities such as Down Syndrome, Autism and even physical disabilities. Would you be able to cope with having to be there all the time making sure they are alright and if they need any assistance? Would you be able to cope with having the child with you 24/7 for the rest of your life?

Personally, I wouldn't be able to. But the thing is, is it easy to part from a child easily even if it has a disability? The only options there would be to take would be to put the child up for adoption or abort it. I know this may seem evil to some but I would abort it. I wouldn't want my child living in greif or pain for the rest of it's life.

[sex]

no way even though im gay and this probably sounds horrible would i wouldn't adopt a disabled child. it seems like to much work, people say they are angels but i think most people would not be able to cope!!!

if i was a girl i would abort it, sorry if this offends anyone but its true lol
it effects you for the rest of your life if they disabled!

[Yawn]

i guess i could deal with an autistic child but they might be a bit annoying

the others i'd just have to leave by some bins cos i couldnt deal with it dribbling all the time it would make me feel unclean

[Cerys]

I think if it's your own child, you'd learn to cope with them as you'd love them with all your heart.

I think it'd be a very very tough decision about aborting the child if I knew they were going to be going through misery etc. Because how do you know that? They could have down syndrome but live a very good life, but if you abort it, you're not giving the child a chance to live and explore.

It's a tough question tbh :)

[Yawn]

i guess ur right cerys u could trial run ur disabled baby and give it up for adoption if it is annoying

[myles]

I do agree with subo. They could be extremely annoying so thats one reason to get rid of them.

[Stephen]

no I'd chuck it in the bin and get another one

[Samantha]

I would think that many make themselves cope with time, I would love and look after my child regardless of whether they were disabled or not. However, it also depends what disability they have, if they cannot do anything themselves, with the addition of being able to hear or see, so they could literally be able to do nothing thus live in a bubble/shell then that's when it changes. If they're not really having a life and will not until they die is that fair on them?

[212]

i wud chuk it in bin nd leg it

[wixard]

i dunno people saying you learn to cope are talking bs
i've an aunt who has a downsyndrome kid he'll never be able to talk, or go to the bathroom on his own
he's going to need a carer for the rest of his life and that will be her

when she was drunk once she told me that she hates her life and that she resents him every single day

anyway i don't think i would be able to do it

[Shar]

I can't say I can as I've not experienced it. If I did have a disabled child I would love it as I would love a "normal" one because after all it would be my own.

[buttons]

i wouldn't abort because u hear those stories that people are told their kids will be disabled but then they come out completely fine. if i had to take care of a kid 24/7 until i died, cleaning its nappies or giving it oxygen every so hours, i couldn't do it. autism and w.e i could handle but not extreme physical disabilities and probably not Down syndrome as comes with physical and mental impairments. it's kinda hard to tell though because what if your child is born perfectly healthy then at the age of 4 or 12 or even 20 they're in an accident which renders them physically disabled and requiring around the clock care, what then?

[Jazz]

I don't think I could personally, I think that you would need to have a good tolerance level. I couldn't handle seeing someone in that situation in pain either, they have different problems and it must really hurt them somewhat.

[Daltron]

Well since I like guys I probably would only adopt and I wouldn't adopt a disabled child simply because it would be too stressful for me, but if for some reason I had a child with someone naturally and it was disabled I would attempt to adapt to the situation the best I can.

[Zelda]

I would definitely abort the child tbh assuming I found out early enough. obviously if it was too late I'd just stick them up for adoption though as I just know I wouldn't be able to cope and aborting them is probably fairest really if it's a really horrible disability, though if it wasn't such a bad one that would make their life awful I dunno really though I still don't personally see them as alive during the time you can abort them

[geo]

i wouldn't adopt a kid with those problems, no. :P i'm not sure if i'd be able to cope with down syndrome either, so i'd probably abort it. :( i can barely take care of myself so. autism i could probably handle, or atleast i'd try.

[mrwoooooooo]

y'all should ask your parents how they managed

[noddy]

of course it would be hypocrtical of me not to cos i am rly disabled irl

[lucaskf390]

In my opinion abort is never a solution. You're thinking about your comfort... It's hard to take care of a disable child... God give it [baby] a life and you abort for your comfort is NOT right... Get able and teach this kid with love. That's what matter.

--

[buttons]

In my opinion abort is never a solution. You're thinking about your comfort... It's hard to take care of a disable child... God give it [baby] a life and you abort for your comfort is NOT right... Get able and teach this kid with love. That's what matter.

--
god doesn't impregnate u tho

[MKR&*42]

I wouldn't ever ask for it to be aborted , but I would like euthenasia to be legalised (holy Crap we might actually reach the 21st century then) so that child could decide at 16 or whatever whether he or she definitely wanted to continue a life of disability or not. I think every child deserves a chance, although it would be more challenging to manage it as a parent, I wouldn't ever consider abortion an option as I disagree with it on almost every grounds.

[Phil]

I understand that most people wouldn't want to they believe they couldn't cope with a child with severe disabilities and I respect that thought but some of the comments in this thread disgust me, saying you'll leave the child by a bin to rot is disgusting and those who think it should be disgusted with themselves.

Of course if you have a child with a severe disability life will become more challenging but in some aspects, it can be so rewarding and you'll love that child no matter what because it's your child, at least you should! It has done nothing wrong to you, he/she deserves to live the best life possible.

So yes, I think I would learn to adapt to caring for a child with special needs if it came to it.

[Inseriousity.]

i dunno people saying you learn to cope are talking bs
i've an aunt who has a downsyndrome kid he'll never be able to talk, or go to the bathroom on his own
he's going to need a carer for the rest of his life and that will be her

Got an uncle with downs syndrome with exactly the same problems. I also have another one (they were both adopted) who is now living in semi-independent (there are carers there but they're given the freedom to do as they wish within reason). I would love my children just the way they are. Taking disability out of the situation, just coping with a normal child is a lot of hard work and effort. You've got responsibility for another innocent human being who is dependent on you to look after them. Add disability and it just gets more tricky but I do not think it's impossible and as with all parenting, you do have to adapt and it's all trial and error finding out what works and what doesn't. I have a big family so a good support network behind me if I ever need a free babysitter or advice and our experience of dealing with disabled people in the family already means we have that advantage.

[Aiden]

i could cope because im quite mean and wouldnt care lol

i personally wouldnt want one
u only live once and i dont think ppl shud put unneeded stress on themselves :)

i would wnt a kid who angry issues tho lol

[Gibs960]

I wouldn't choose a disabled child, just because they are restrictive and I would rather have a non-disabled child. But if my wife or girlfriend gave birth to a disabled child or we knew it was disabled before it was born, I would be against aborting or putting the baby up for adoption. I would probably suffer from severe depression afterwards, I feel bad saying bye to my nephew when I'll see him the next day, I probably would cope worse if I gave it away.

[dbgtz]

I couldn't cope with any disabilities which would make me take care of them for longer than a parent should. So I could cope with minor physical disabilities such as paralysis from the waist down, but I couldn't deal with things such as downs syndrome. I actually fear having kids for this reason and being unable to cope with it, leading for me to run away which would be an absolutely horrible thing to do.


In my opinion abort is never a solution. You're thinking about your comfort... It's hard to take care of a disable child... God give it [baby] a life and you abort for your comfort is NOT right... Get able and teach this kid with love. That's what matter.

--

It's not solely about the comfort of a parent, the child could be so disabled that their life is one of horrible quality. Which surely makes you question that if there is a god, why does he allow them to have such a poor quality of life? Oh they're created in his vision... did his contacts fall out? Oh but god loves them... that's nice I'm sure that'll get them through their **** state of life, love from a being you can't even see or feel.

[beth]

no. never. i looked after my autistic sister full time for a year and it made me want to curl up and die. it ****** me up so much.

it would be selfish of me to bring a disabled child into the world because i would resent it and though i wouldn't abuse it, i would most definitely not be as fulfilling a parent that i should be.

[lucaskf390]

@dbgtz
So, Only because the kid is limited. Doesn't have the right to live? Should abort all disabled kids?

"I couldn't cope with any disabilities which would make me take care of them for longer than a parent should."
When you have an parent-son experience, time won't matter... Life will flow. I feel egoism in your speech.

"It's not solely about the comfort of a parent, the child could be so disabled that their life is one of horrible quality."
Parents must help their children to have a good life.

I believe God create and people choose their choices. Poor quality life depends on what conditions it's created and educated.

--

[buttons]

So, Only because the kid is limited. Doesn't have the right to live? Should abort all disabled kids?

"I couldn't cope with any disabilities which would make me take care of them for longer than a parent should."
When you have an parent-son experience, time won't matter... Life will flow. I feel egoism in your speech.

"It's not solely about the comfort of a parent, the child could be so disabled that their life is one of horrible quality."
Parents must help their children to have a good life.

I believe God create and people choose their choices. Poor quality life depends on what conditions it's created and educated.

--
y doesn't god allow good people to have babies

[lucaskf390]

y doesn't god allow good people to have babies
What does 'good' means to you?

For me for a married and happy couple have a baby it's glory. Not a problem.

[dbgtz]

@dbgtz
So, Only because the kid is limited. Doesn't have the right to live? Should abort all disabled kids?


It's not my right to tell other people if they should abort their foetus.



"I couldn't cope with any disabilities which would make me take care of them for longer than a parent should."
When you have an parent-son experience, time won't matter... Life will flow.


You could literally say that about anything.



I feel egoism in your speech.


Perhaps, but nobody becomes a parent to be a carer for the rest of their life. They expect their kids to grow up and get their own lives and whilst they may still worry and interfere in their life decisions, are ultimately free from responsibility and have passed down the torch. They don't expect to find themselves at 70 years old, clearing up the crap of a 40 year old grown man who decided to smother poo all over the wall. My point here is that it's simply not fair on the parent to be expected to do this until their death. Really, I'd go as far as saying nobody has any obligation to take care of them.



"It's not solely about the comfort of a parent, the child could be so disabled that their life is one of horrible quality."
Parents must help their children to have a good life.


Why?



I believe God create and people choose their choices. Poor quality life depends on what conditions it's created and educated.

--

I'm confused at what you're saying here.

[cornbix]

I'd abort it or put it up for adoption.. I would never have any form of disabled child. I wish you could find out if children are dyslexic before they're born so they can be aborted too.

[KatieDuckie.]

It would be hard at first but it just takes time I guess. No way I'd let a child die just cause they are disabled. so harsh.

[Catchy]

Personally I honestly don't know and I don't think anybody knows for sure until it happens to them. It's not an easy decision as at the end of the day it's still your child. I was in the pub a few days ago and there was a kid there who wasn't with it (not sure what was wrong with him) but his parents just had to pretend his random outbursts weren't happening and carried on with their conversation. It looked so difficult and personally I don't THINK I'd be able to cope but like I said, it's so different when people are actually in that situation. Emotions take over and I guess once you're a parent, everything is different and you'd do absolutely anything for that child out of unconditional love. Each to their own though and nobody should be judged for choosing not to raise a disabled child, it's hard.

[Sharon]

I'd abort it or put it up for adoption.. I would never have any form of disabled child. I wish you could find out if children are dyslexic before they're born so they can be aborted too.

Plenty of people are dyslexic and have gone on to be perfectly fine?

[Yawn]

Plenty of people are dyslexic and have gone on to be perfectly fine?
it would just be disappointing tbh!...

[buttons]

Shaz they r just trolling without dyslexic people we wouldn't have telephone, Einstein and most importantly CHER

[Yawn]

cher lloyd isnt dyslexic and neither is lady gaga :Innocent:

[Jazz]

cher lloyd isnt dyslexic

I think they are talking about Cher, not Cher Lloyd.

[buttons]

no im talking about the good cher n hahahaha i just got that

[Plegar]

Disabled children are a burden. Compulsory abortion should be implemented when the foetus is detected as having Down’s, spina bifida or similar syndrome which, if it is born, could render the child a burden on the state as well as on the family. It is much kinder to the foetus to terminate it before it develops and most likely has vast trouble living day to day in the world. A foetus that is discovered to have a mental or physical disability ought to be aborted for the sake of itself, family and nationalised health care.

All life is precious, but a foetus isn't alive.

[Ekelektra]

When my mum was pregnant with my youngest brother, she had him screened for everything and had decided that she would abort him if they found anything serious. But my dad was very against that so they decided that if he was disabled, they would leave it and see just how serious it was when he was alive, and then if he was extremely sick they were going to ask the doctors to not give him any medical help.

Thankfully my brother was born perfectly healthy but if he wasn't I think it would have been cruel to just leave him to fight for himself. If it was me I would probably abort if my baby was found to have a serious disability, although it would depend on my partner's opinion.

[-:Undertaker:-]

Disabled children are a burden. Compulsory abortion should be implemented when the foetus is detected as having Down’s, spina bifida or similar syndrome which, if it is born, could render the child a burden on the state as well as on the family. It is much kinder to the foetus to terminate it before it develops and most likely has vast trouble living day to day in the world. A foetus that is discovered to have a mental or physical disability ought to be aborted for the sake of itself, family and nationalised health care.

All life is precious, but a foetus isn't alive.

Sounds like something out of the Third Reich.

As for myself - i'm not sure I could cope. Parents who have disabled kids and who manage probably have one of the hardest and most draining jobs on the planet, it's impossible for us to even imagine how they manage to cope.

[haylashayla]

no sorry x

[karter]

Oh god no I don't think I will be able to do it, my mum's friend who had a son diagnosed with Thalassemia and she took care of him all the time till the day he died at the age of 11. Just can't imagine how painful it would've been..11 years of pain and agony. I won't be able to cope with it honestly, and this is why I strongly respect those parents who try so hard to keep their disabled children so happy.

[dirrty]

i would push for an abortion if tests suggested that my future child could be disabled. obviously being the male, my word is not final, but i wouldn't want a disabled child. and if my gyaldem was like "i'm keeping the kid regardless", it would put a serious strain on our relationship imo. sounds selfish, but i couldn't handle it (props to all those that do). i wouldn't want to be 'burdened' (such a harsh word, but it's true) with the multiple responsibilities, and i just want the 'easy' way out.

[ToyTruck]

I don't know this is a hard choice because I do not really agree on abortion if the child is disabled as I find it kind of cruel but I think I could cope but at the end of the day it would have to matter how serious the child's illness is and I am too the male so I don't get the final decision.