if you were a sperm donor baby...

[wixard]

as in your mum went and got sperm from a sperm bank off an anonymous donor and used it to conceive you, would you want to know the man who provided that sperm?

watched generation cryo and discussed this with a few friends, i'll give you a few situations to apply to yourself and give me an individual answer.

scenario 1: you grew up with both a mum and a dad, your dad was infertile and that's why you were conceived with donor sperm.

scenario 2: you grew up with two mums, and never had a father figure.

scenario 3: your mum wanted a child but didn't have a bf/husband, and decided to raise you alone. you never had a father figure in your life.

would you like to know the identity/see a photo of the donor?
would you like to meet the donor?
would you want him involved in your life?


edit 2 make format easier 2 read xoxo

[Evanora]

yes

[Kardan]

I'd say no to all of them, it's essentially a total random stranger and my life would be perfectly fine without knowing :)

[wixard]

yes

-repped

my answer

i'd want to see a picture in all 3 scenarios but that's it, wouldn't go any further in any of them but i guess you can't be sure until you're actually in that situation, which none of us ever will be

[buttons]

maybe i would like to see a picture because imagine not knowing who u look like?!?!
my friend never seen her dad and she doesn't look much like her mum, i would probs have an identity crisis
but doubt id want to meet them

[Amberr]

its difficult really as its a complete stranger who would have provided the sperm, i think if i never grew up without a father figure I would probably want to know who he was, don't think i would want to know though with a father figure around. But then I think I would want to know who I look like so maybe a photo i would like.

[Futz]

would you like to know the identity/see a photo of the donor?

I'd like to know who it was just out of curiosity

would you like to meet the donor?

It'd be pretty cool to meet them briefly if they were cool with it but I'm not sure if they're told if their sperm is used so I wouldn't wanna drop I'm your son on them. Also, it'd be cool to see if the bank had logs of his sperm being used for any other babies, just to see if I have any half brother or sisters.

would you want him involved in your life?

I wouldn't expect anything from them but if they wanted to be friends, it's just another connection in your life I guess so that'd be cool


I think my answers would be the same to all scenarios, be cool to meet my biological father but I would in no way expect anything from them and if they didn't want to find out they had children I wouldn't push for it

[wixard]

would you like to know the identity/see a photo of the donor?

I'd like to know who it was just out of curiosity

would you like to meet the donor?

It'd be pretty cool to meet them briefly if they were cool with it but I'm not sure if they're told if their sperm is used so I wouldn't wanna drop I'm your son on them. Also, it'd be cool to see if the bank had logs of his sperm being used for any other babies, just to see if I have any half brother or sisters.

would you want him involved in your life?

I wouldn't expect anything from them but if they wanted to be friends, it's just another connection in your life I guess so that'd be cool


I think my answers would be the same to all scenarios, be cool to meet my biological father but I would in no way expect anything from them and if they didn't want to find out they had children I wouldn't push for it

that's all touched on in the show, there is a website where you enter your donors id number and you can see if you have half siblings. even though he's an anonymous donor the person requesting the sperm gets this big file on him and his life, just without the name or photo obviously. the records are always kept at the banks and you can go in and request to send a letter to the donor and it will be forwarded on but the donors are not obliged to reply.

in the show there are 16 of them i think, which is really rare apparently but does happen sometimes. they send him letters and he never replies, some of them wanna meet him and the others want nothing to do with it, but one even calls him 'dad'

[Kardan]

that's all touched on in the show, there is a website where you enter your donors id number and you can see if you have half siblings. even though he's an anonymous donor the person requesting the sperm gets this big file on him and his life, just without the name or photo obviously. the records are always kept at the banks and you can go in and request to send a letter to the donor and it will be forwarded on but the donors are not obliged to reply.

in the show there are 16 of them i think, which is really rare apparently but does happen sometimes. they send him letters and he never replies, some of them wanna meet him and the others want nothing to do with it, but one even calls him 'dad'

Imagine if you did that and got:

"Results returned: 46"

I mean, meh. It's almost meaningless.

[Futz]

Imagine if you did that and got:

"Results returned: 46"

I mean, meh. It's almost meaningless.

you'd have to start asking girls you meet if they're donor babies

[wixard]

Imagine if you did that and got:

"Results returned: 46"

I mean, meh. It's almost meaningless.

in the show they're all friends and seem to really enjoy that biological connection, the ones that seem to be involved with each other the most are the ones that want nothing to do with the donor

[Absently]

I would say no to them all. In scenario one I already have my mother and my father there's no need for another person in my life. The whole two mothers I'd say no because I personally don't believe you need a father figure in your life, same with scenario 3. I never grew up with a permanent father figure in my life and I honestly have never felt left out or if I missed out on anything. I would also believe a lot of the males that donate sperm are doing it for the money instead of thinking about the out come (obviously not all)

[Kardan]

in the show they're all friends and seem to really enjoy that biological connection, the ones that seem to be involved with each other the most are the ones that want nothing to do with the donor

I'd find it strange meeting the half siblings let alone hanging out let alone being friends.

- - - Updated - - -


instead of thinking about the out come

nice pun

[scottish]

would you like to know the identity/see a photo of the donor? No
would you like to meet the donor? No
would you want him involved in your life? No

[Futz]

i've never understood why people answer these threads with a reply as **** as the one above

like fair enough if you don't wanna give your reasoning but like you don't have to reply

[scottish]

because that's what the questions asked, nowhere did it say explain your reasoning for each one, so she got the response with the template she provided

If anyone wants to know then I'm sure they have the ability to post a reply asking why, but in majority of cases no-one will give a **** so why bother?

Maybe people want to reply and not give their reasoning because it's personal or something?

idk I don't give my reason because I doubt anyone gives a **** and if they do they can feel free to reply.

[buttons]

lmao reece, he's just not a deep person!

[LiquidLuck.]

Scenario 1: I'd hope my parents would never tell me that my dad was not my father.

Scenario 2: I would probably start to ask questions and want to see a picture, wouldn't mind meeting him to ask questions. About having him involved in my life it would depend: did he donate his sperm only for money? If so, was it for a good cause? Does he know if I have half siblings? Has he met any and was he interested in being a part of their lives? Most important, is he interested in being a part of MY life?

Scenario 3: Same as the second one but would probably want him to be a part of my life more due to now having two people loving me unconditionally unlike most people do.

[Kyle]

because that's what the questions asked, nowhere did it say explain your reasoning for each one, so she got the response with the template she provided

If anyone wants to know then I'm sure they have the ability to post a reply asking why, but in majority of cases no-one will give a **** so why bother?

Maybe people want to reply and not give their reasoning because it's personal or something?

idk I don't give my reason because I doubt anyone gives a **** and if they do they can feel free to reply.
I would like to know your reasoning and I do care about everybody's posts

I would meet them if they wanted to meet me but it's a sperm donation, they could have hundreds of kids and not care about any of them. 1 of my friends was looking for ways to make money and decided to do sperm donation and they said he was a perfect sample so in 16 yrs or so I can see him being approached :O.

I would like to meet siblings cos at least I would be able to form a bond with those, well, moreso than with a bloke who beat 1 off into a cup years ago and probably has no desire to meet me. If you already have parents then you can't really replace them even if they aren't biological, I would feel like I was betraying my dad if I went off and did dad things with my real dad.

[Sian]

i think i would like to know, i'd very much think i'd be curious to see what my biological father was like and also learn of any illnesses, conditions in his family so I knew for the future.

[Brad]

I'd say up to the photo to all three scenarios only for the fact that I wouldn't want my "father", aka the sperm donor to be some drug addict trying to get drug money or some low life. Haha. So, the photo would suffice my wondering who they are. I rather them be mysterious, than knowing what they are.

[FlyingJesus]

I'd want to know what they looked like so I'd know if I was likely to turn out fit, and knowing their medical history obv quite useful but not convinced that I'd want them "involved" since obv they wouldn't have had an actual role in my life and weren't exactly planning on being a father to me anyway so what would be the point and why would they want to either

[Jurv]

i literally know nothing about sperm donors so don't judge my answers

scenario 1: you grew up with both a mum and a dad, your dad was infertile and that's why you were conceived with donor sperm.

unless they were a family friend and my mum/dad still spoke to them then sure i'd meet them. but if they were just a random person or someone my family wasn't in contact with anymore i wouldn't see the point. i'd have both a mum and dad already so idk how this person would fit in

scenario 2: you grew up with two mums, and never had a father figure.

i think it'd be the exact same as the first, wouldn't really bother unless they were a family friend or w/e

scenario 3: your mum wanted a child but didn't have a bf/husband, and decided to raise you alone. you never had a father figure in your life.

hm this one made me think more, i think it'd be similar to the first two scenarios but i'd be more inclined to see a photograph and maybe meet him considering there hasn't been that 'other' parent in my life. i don't think i'd consider him my father though but idk depends what was going through his mind during the time

[Yawn]

a bloke who beat 1 off into a cup years ago

lol

-

anyway hmm maybe it would be nice to meet them but its kinda weird and if u have a gd thing with ur existing parents maybe its best not to throw a 3rd parent into the mix and shake it up too much

[Empired]

No. I wouldn't want anything to do with them- why would I?

Any idiot can have a baby (mostly), but a parent is the person who does things like kiss your knee when you fall over and scrape it, drive over to school to drop off your lunch when you forget it, etc. Just because you share the same genes doesn't make them anything special to you IMO.

[dbgtz]

No, I wouldn't care at all about them.

At most, I would be curious as to where they live so I don't accidentally try it on with someone who turn's out to be my half sister. Then again, if they're a donor anyone could be related lol.

[LiquidLuck.]

No, I wouldn't care at all about them.

At most, I would be curious as to where they live so I don't accidentally try it on with someone who turn's out to be my half sister. Then again, if they're a donor anyone could be related lol.

You wouldn't have a chance with her anyway x

OT: I'd just want to know the reason they decided to donate sperm.