Kj2005
12-10-2005, 04:52 PM
Pulling Factfiles
10 Signs She Fancies You
Is a girl you know acting strange? She might have the hots for you. We've noticed the 10 top ways girls show they really care.
1) Her face is the colour of ketchup ...
...but she hasn't got a tan. She simply can't help blushing because you're in the same room. And no, it's not cos‘It’s hot in here’.
2) She's really quiet
Get her chatting by asking simple questions. If she starts talking rubbish and breathing funny, then you know you're in with a chance...
3) She ignores you in a crowd...
...but can't help sneaking a peek when she thinks you're not looking. This girl's no amateur: she’s playing it cool but she just can’t resist checking you out.
4) Is she watching your lips?If she is, it's a good sign. It means she's thinking about pressing her lips close to yours.
5) She copies your movements
If you're sitting opposite each other and you cross your arms, you might notice that she's doing it to. It's cos her body is aping your movements.
6) Her pupils get larger
It's an involuntary reaction to seeing something you like. Don't peer too intently into her face, though, or she'll think you're a mentalist ; )
7) She engages you in pointless arguments
Yep, she's trying to get you to notice her. She wants you to know she's passionate and opinionated, and she's frustrated that you're not completely under her spell.
8) She finds any excuse to brush up against you
Even the subtlest of moves can mean just as much as a note pressed into your hand at a bus stop.
9) She wears lots of slap when you’re around
It may look over the top but make a note that it's probably for your benefit.
10) You hear rumours that she likes youWho do you think started them?
Are you in Love?
You just can't stop thinking about her. When she's around you have that kind of dazed dopey grin that looks like someone's whacked you over the head with a mallet. Ah, love...
Love Checklist:
1) You told your mates you like her. They laughed at you for ages, but you just don't care - even though they take the p out of you *all the time* now.
2) You've met her parents.
3) Everything she does is cute and she's never even slightly annoying.
4) You've hung out with her mates and even tried to talk about McFly.
5) You find everything about her indescribably attractive, you feel sick when you catch her talking to some other guy, and she's the first person you think about when you get up. You had a dream you got married.
Love and Lust
Love and lust are totally different, but it's easy to confuse them. So how do you tell?
•Lust: if all you want to do is grab her and snog until dark, skipping all the chitchat and stuff about her day, it's probably lust.
•Love: when you're in love you still wanna snog her like there's no tomorrow, but it's the stuff she says that's really burning up your pants.
Sunny Delight
Being in love with someone when it's not returned is miserable, but knowing that someone loves you back is a holiday in Ibiza with an unlimited budget. Mystical figures say that you fall in love three times in your life. You may be due your first one very soon...
Chatting Up Girls
Remember that every girl likes to be chatted up. If you follow these rules soon you’ll be pressing palms with the girl of your choice.
Catch her eye
Then look away, pretend you’re not interested. She’ll probably giggle, tell a couple of her friends, and they’ll turn round and tell her all the gossip they’ve ever heard about you. Hopefully it won’t be *all* bad. Don’t look at her again - just be cool and mysterious. She’ll get all confused and then start thinking about you loads...
Compliment her on a Girlie Thing
Great belt. Fine shoes! Girls spend much of their life buying stuff like this. You don’t need to have a clue about these things, but she’ll love the fact that you’re noticing what she’s wearing.
Lend an Ear
'...the vicar said not on Thursday and then my mother called me in for tea.' So her stories aren’t that fascinating, but you should listen to them anyway. Ask questions. The more you know about her the more you can ask her about stuff she likes. She will also like talking, so just let her.
Envy on the Side
Chat to other girls in front of her. Even better, chat to one of her friends in front of her. Why?
1) You'll find out what she’s hot for.
2) Her friend will pass on every word (think up some subtle compliments).
3) She'll be mad with jealousy - she thought you liked her.
And don't worry - most girls don't want boys to be 'one of the girls' and spend all day window-shopping and swooning over Ashton Kutcher. Follow the tips and within two weeks - well, let's just say girls’ll probably be queueing up to chat you up.
Saying ‘I Love You’
Think long and hard before you say these three words. You can melt a girl’s heart, but only if you really mean it.
When to say it
These words need respect, so try not to do it over a sandwich at break. The more effort you make before you say it, the more likely she's going to believe it completely.
Location, location
Take her to her fave eaterie when it's not too busy and make sure there’s no one listening in. Say it right at the end of your meal/coffee when she might be thinking of other things. Surprise is your secret weapon.
Make ‘em the last wordsWhisper it in her ear just before you shoot off with your mates. If those are the last words she hears then she'll do nothing but tell her long-suffering friends just how wonderful you are and they’ll be forced to agree.
She loves me
You want to tell her but you're worried that she's just gonna laugh in your face. Avoid this potential trauma by only saying it when you're pretty sure she almost feels the same.
She loves me not
If there's a silence and no declaration of love back, then don't run out of the café/restaurant screaming like a madman. Girls are sensitive creatures and she might think you want to get her into bed or that you want to get really serious (not what she wants right now). Reassure her it's not true, even if you were sort of thinking along those lines, you love sick fool!
Avoid the awkward moment
You're worried but you still really want to let her know. Start with: ‘Look, I don't mean to get heavy/serious/intense’ or act a little confused like ‘I think I'm love with you’ Even though you’re holding back on a full declaration, it’s enough. You're not asking her to say it back to you, and the heats off.
Older Girls
Experienced, confident, mature and sophisticated. Older women have these attributes in spades, so if you're lusting after some 20-something lady be aware that they're gonna possess this and a whole lot more. Sounds enticing?
Who's 50 Cent?
Girls of a certain age won't necessarily know what's chart hot and what's driving rock, so don't be surprised if there are conversations that neither of you really understand. If she mentions her favourite band’s REM then just nod and smile and hope that she doesn't like Elton John as well.
Friends Like These
Her friends could be bankers or lawyers who enjoy barbecues at the weekend and sensible discussions. Dull behaviour, but if you're going to be with an older women then you're gonna have to go out with her friends. And she's gonna have to go out with yours. Could be a problem...
Been around the World
Older girls have more experience (in almost everything), which is great, but she might want you to do stuff that you’ve only read about in magazines. Don’t rush it. If she doesn’t care about taking it at your pace then don’t feel bad about losing her.
What's the Deal?
Why’s this stunning older girl going for my scrawny butt? Good question. She might want to control you (you're young and easily manipulated), dazzle you with her experience (causing a bit of worship on your part), or just have someone naïve and full of energy. Remember puppet relationships are strictly for the pantomime season, so don’t let her walk all over you.
Younger Girls
You've heard that girls mature quicker than boys (maaany times), and yep there's truth in the rumour, but don't let it fool you into thinking that the girl a couple of years below you is going to be your picture-perfect arm candy.
How old are you really?
Girls have this weird ability to make themselves look older than they are, but if you know her school year then you're gonna know the birthday digits. And so are your mates. Going out with a much younger girl doesn't have the kahunas that going out with an older one has - a fact that your mates will remind you of again and again.
Awe-some
She'll probably look up to you like a father figure, but is that really what you want in a girl? Her friends will be worried about you leading her astray and it's best if we don't even mention what her family would think if they found out the apple of their eye was cavorting with ‘someone older’.
Young at Heart
She's going to be mixing with her own age and chatting about stuff you can't even remember girls riffing about it was so long ago. She could well be hooked up on some howling boy band as well, and not equipped to talk about stuff you want a girlfriend to.
Physical Education
Girls might mature at different speeds (yawn, yawn) to boys but that doesn't necessarily mean that she's going to be ready to get physical with your new horny self. It could be frustrating, but you can't rush her.
Jealousy
Jealousy’s an evil beast and needs to be chained up and thrown in a prison cell. If you're suffering, here's what to do...
Grit your teeth
Sometimes you just can't help but get jealous when your woman flutters her eyelids at the ugly guy in the paper shop. You'll feel ill, your stomach will churn, you'll feel helpless and frustrated but there'll be nothing that you can do about it. But it just proves that you've got feelings for the girl and that's a good thing.
She's yours
Just take it as flattery if she has a circle of bad playground comedians trying to impress her and make her laugh. Don't go steaming in and tossing out the jesters and clutching her like an over-protective guardian. Very uncool. She won’t like your protective streak (they were only talking to her after all) and your relationship will end very soon.
Jealousy Reunited
We all want what other people have, so if Fabio has a hoard of panting girlies around him while still managing to score all the goals at football, then it's gonna make us envious. But then we've always got something that they haven't, even if it's not immediately obvious. He may cry himself to sleep at night, and we wouldn't want that to happen to us would we? There are people jealous of you - you just don’t know it yet.
How to Chuck Her
Bored/fancy someone else/rather spend time with your mates/it's the Chinese New Year - whatever the reasons, most girls, if they sat down and wrote it down, would prefer it if you told them the truth. However, being dumped can be a painful business.
Not in front of her mates
Pick somewhere you're both familiar with (café, park) so she doesn't get wind of your plans. And be natural, you know, like you’re not about to dump her. Don't do it in a crowded public place either, cos she may not want to be surrounded by screaming kids when you tell her.
‘Why’ is always the trickiest word
Be honest, if you can, maybe softening the blow a little by phrasing it like, ‘I don't think we're getting on so well’, rather than the more simple, ‘You're dumped’. Remember it all goes back to her friends, so be as much of a man as you can. You may get shouted down, but at least in the long term her friends may be merciful.
OK it's done. Now what?
Dumping someone is not going to increase your popularity, apart from with your mates, but they're hardly new girlf. material. You may have to lay low for a while, especially if it didn't go as planned.
Post chucking
Give it a month and don't try it on with any of her friends, don't gloat about it in the company of other girls and avoid her brother if she's got one.
Get Over Your Ex
Your ex is getting it on with some guy right in front of you, rubbing your single status in all her joy and happiness. Time to get over her in many, many, ways...
Another girl
Often called ‘on the rebound’ and the best way to get over an ex. Try not to pick anyone who looks too much like her (you can do without the flashbacks), someone you don’t even like (don’t torture yourself) or someone who knows too much about your history. Girls sniff out those on the rebound like tracker dogs at customs. Even just a quick snog with someone will help you start forgetting her.
Queen of Tarts
How she picked her nose when she was thinking hard, her obsession with hot pants, and the way her face drooped when she got sad. Those things really annoyed the hell out of you. If it makes you feel better, get rid of her letters, throw her friendship ring down a deep well and chuck out the teddy.
Rediscover your mates
Friends might have given you a little grace when you started seeing her, with your soppy grin and your burning red phone, but they wouldn’t have liked losing you to a girl. With her out of your life get back in with your tribe and enjoy sessions of dissing girls and lusting after new ones.
Always say Never Again
Just chalk it up as part of life's learning curve and be grateful that it happened to you early on in your love arc. You’ll wonder where it all went wrong and make a mental note not to go out with some screeching girlie like that again. Within six months you’ll be friends again and she’ll be wondering what she gave up. Tooo late. Never go back and always look forward.
More coming soon
10 Signs She Fancies You
Is a girl you know acting strange? She might have the hots for you. We've noticed the 10 top ways girls show they really care.
1) Her face is the colour of ketchup ...
...but she hasn't got a tan. She simply can't help blushing because you're in the same room. And no, it's not cos‘It’s hot in here’.
2) She's really quiet
Get her chatting by asking simple questions. If she starts talking rubbish and breathing funny, then you know you're in with a chance...
3) She ignores you in a crowd...
...but can't help sneaking a peek when she thinks you're not looking. This girl's no amateur: she’s playing it cool but she just can’t resist checking you out.
4) Is she watching your lips?If she is, it's a good sign. It means she's thinking about pressing her lips close to yours.
5) She copies your movements
If you're sitting opposite each other and you cross your arms, you might notice that she's doing it to. It's cos her body is aping your movements.
6) Her pupils get larger
It's an involuntary reaction to seeing something you like. Don't peer too intently into her face, though, or she'll think you're a mentalist ; )
7) She engages you in pointless arguments
Yep, she's trying to get you to notice her. She wants you to know she's passionate and opinionated, and she's frustrated that you're not completely under her spell.
8) She finds any excuse to brush up against you
Even the subtlest of moves can mean just as much as a note pressed into your hand at a bus stop.
9) She wears lots of slap when you’re around
It may look over the top but make a note that it's probably for your benefit.
10) You hear rumours that she likes youWho do you think started them?
Are you in Love?
You just can't stop thinking about her. When she's around you have that kind of dazed dopey grin that looks like someone's whacked you over the head with a mallet. Ah, love...
Love Checklist:
1) You told your mates you like her. They laughed at you for ages, but you just don't care - even though they take the p out of you *all the time* now.
2) You've met her parents.
3) Everything she does is cute and she's never even slightly annoying.
4) You've hung out with her mates and even tried to talk about McFly.
5) You find everything about her indescribably attractive, you feel sick when you catch her talking to some other guy, and she's the first person you think about when you get up. You had a dream you got married.
Love and Lust
Love and lust are totally different, but it's easy to confuse them. So how do you tell?
•Lust: if all you want to do is grab her and snog until dark, skipping all the chitchat and stuff about her day, it's probably lust.
•Love: when you're in love you still wanna snog her like there's no tomorrow, but it's the stuff she says that's really burning up your pants.
Sunny Delight
Being in love with someone when it's not returned is miserable, but knowing that someone loves you back is a holiday in Ibiza with an unlimited budget. Mystical figures say that you fall in love three times in your life. You may be due your first one very soon...
Chatting Up Girls
Remember that every girl likes to be chatted up. If you follow these rules soon you’ll be pressing palms with the girl of your choice.
Catch her eye
Then look away, pretend you’re not interested. She’ll probably giggle, tell a couple of her friends, and they’ll turn round and tell her all the gossip they’ve ever heard about you. Hopefully it won’t be *all* bad. Don’t look at her again - just be cool and mysterious. She’ll get all confused and then start thinking about you loads...
Compliment her on a Girlie Thing
Great belt. Fine shoes! Girls spend much of their life buying stuff like this. You don’t need to have a clue about these things, but she’ll love the fact that you’re noticing what she’s wearing.
Lend an Ear
'...the vicar said not on Thursday and then my mother called me in for tea.' So her stories aren’t that fascinating, but you should listen to them anyway. Ask questions. The more you know about her the more you can ask her about stuff she likes. She will also like talking, so just let her.
Envy on the Side
Chat to other girls in front of her. Even better, chat to one of her friends in front of her. Why?
1) You'll find out what she’s hot for.
2) Her friend will pass on every word (think up some subtle compliments).
3) She'll be mad with jealousy - she thought you liked her.
And don't worry - most girls don't want boys to be 'one of the girls' and spend all day window-shopping and swooning over Ashton Kutcher. Follow the tips and within two weeks - well, let's just say girls’ll probably be queueing up to chat you up.
Saying ‘I Love You’
Think long and hard before you say these three words. You can melt a girl’s heart, but only if you really mean it.
When to say it
These words need respect, so try not to do it over a sandwich at break. The more effort you make before you say it, the more likely she's going to believe it completely.
Location, location
Take her to her fave eaterie when it's not too busy and make sure there’s no one listening in. Say it right at the end of your meal/coffee when she might be thinking of other things. Surprise is your secret weapon.
Make ‘em the last wordsWhisper it in her ear just before you shoot off with your mates. If those are the last words she hears then she'll do nothing but tell her long-suffering friends just how wonderful you are and they’ll be forced to agree.
She loves me
You want to tell her but you're worried that she's just gonna laugh in your face. Avoid this potential trauma by only saying it when you're pretty sure she almost feels the same.
She loves me not
If there's a silence and no declaration of love back, then don't run out of the café/restaurant screaming like a madman. Girls are sensitive creatures and she might think you want to get her into bed or that you want to get really serious (not what she wants right now). Reassure her it's not true, even if you were sort of thinking along those lines, you love sick fool!
Avoid the awkward moment
You're worried but you still really want to let her know. Start with: ‘Look, I don't mean to get heavy/serious/intense’ or act a little confused like ‘I think I'm love with you’ Even though you’re holding back on a full declaration, it’s enough. You're not asking her to say it back to you, and the heats off.
Older Girls
Experienced, confident, mature and sophisticated. Older women have these attributes in spades, so if you're lusting after some 20-something lady be aware that they're gonna possess this and a whole lot more. Sounds enticing?
Who's 50 Cent?
Girls of a certain age won't necessarily know what's chart hot and what's driving rock, so don't be surprised if there are conversations that neither of you really understand. If she mentions her favourite band’s REM then just nod and smile and hope that she doesn't like Elton John as well.
Friends Like These
Her friends could be bankers or lawyers who enjoy barbecues at the weekend and sensible discussions. Dull behaviour, but if you're going to be with an older women then you're gonna have to go out with her friends. And she's gonna have to go out with yours. Could be a problem...
Been around the World
Older girls have more experience (in almost everything), which is great, but she might want you to do stuff that you’ve only read about in magazines. Don’t rush it. If she doesn’t care about taking it at your pace then don’t feel bad about losing her.
What's the Deal?
Why’s this stunning older girl going for my scrawny butt? Good question. She might want to control you (you're young and easily manipulated), dazzle you with her experience (causing a bit of worship on your part), or just have someone naïve and full of energy. Remember puppet relationships are strictly for the pantomime season, so don’t let her walk all over you.
Younger Girls
You've heard that girls mature quicker than boys (maaany times), and yep there's truth in the rumour, but don't let it fool you into thinking that the girl a couple of years below you is going to be your picture-perfect arm candy.
How old are you really?
Girls have this weird ability to make themselves look older than they are, but if you know her school year then you're gonna know the birthday digits. And so are your mates. Going out with a much younger girl doesn't have the kahunas that going out with an older one has - a fact that your mates will remind you of again and again.
Awe-some
She'll probably look up to you like a father figure, but is that really what you want in a girl? Her friends will be worried about you leading her astray and it's best if we don't even mention what her family would think if they found out the apple of their eye was cavorting with ‘someone older’.
Young at Heart
She's going to be mixing with her own age and chatting about stuff you can't even remember girls riffing about it was so long ago. She could well be hooked up on some howling boy band as well, and not equipped to talk about stuff you want a girlfriend to.
Physical Education
Girls might mature at different speeds (yawn, yawn) to boys but that doesn't necessarily mean that she's going to be ready to get physical with your new horny self. It could be frustrating, but you can't rush her.
Jealousy
Jealousy’s an evil beast and needs to be chained up and thrown in a prison cell. If you're suffering, here's what to do...
Grit your teeth
Sometimes you just can't help but get jealous when your woman flutters her eyelids at the ugly guy in the paper shop. You'll feel ill, your stomach will churn, you'll feel helpless and frustrated but there'll be nothing that you can do about it. But it just proves that you've got feelings for the girl and that's a good thing.
She's yours
Just take it as flattery if she has a circle of bad playground comedians trying to impress her and make her laugh. Don't go steaming in and tossing out the jesters and clutching her like an over-protective guardian. Very uncool. She won’t like your protective streak (they were only talking to her after all) and your relationship will end very soon.
Jealousy Reunited
We all want what other people have, so if Fabio has a hoard of panting girlies around him while still managing to score all the goals at football, then it's gonna make us envious. But then we've always got something that they haven't, even if it's not immediately obvious. He may cry himself to sleep at night, and we wouldn't want that to happen to us would we? There are people jealous of you - you just don’t know it yet.
How to Chuck Her
Bored/fancy someone else/rather spend time with your mates/it's the Chinese New Year - whatever the reasons, most girls, if they sat down and wrote it down, would prefer it if you told them the truth. However, being dumped can be a painful business.
Not in front of her mates
Pick somewhere you're both familiar with (café, park) so she doesn't get wind of your plans. And be natural, you know, like you’re not about to dump her. Don't do it in a crowded public place either, cos she may not want to be surrounded by screaming kids when you tell her.
‘Why’ is always the trickiest word
Be honest, if you can, maybe softening the blow a little by phrasing it like, ‘I don't think we're getting on so well’, rather than the more simple, ‘You're dumped’. Remember it all goes back to her friends, so be as much of a man as you can. You may get shouted down, but at least in the long term her friends may be merciful.
OK it's done. Now what?
Dumping someone is not going to increase your popularity, apart from with your mates, but they're hardly new girlf. material. You may have to lay low for a while, especially if it didn't go as planned.
Post chucking
Give it a month and don't try it on with any of her friends, don't gloat about it in the company of other girls and avoid her brother if she's got one.
Get Over Your Ex
Your ex is getting it on with some guy right in front of you, rubbing your single status in all her joy and happiness. Time to get over her in many, many, ways...
Another girl
Often called ‘on the rebound’ and the best way to get over an ex. Try not to pick anyone who looks too much like her (you can do without the flashbacks), someone you don’t even like (don’t torture yourself) or someone who knows too much about your history. Girls sniff out those on the rebound like tracker dogs at customs. Even just a quick snog with someone will help you start forgetting her.
Queen of Tarts
How she picked her nose when she was thinking hard, her obsession with hot pants, and the way her face drooped when she got sad. Those things really annoyed the hell out of you. If it makes you feel better, get rid of her letters, throw her friendship ring down a deep well and chuck out the teddy.
Rediscover your mates
Friends might have given you a little grace when you started seeing her, with your soppy grin and your burning red phone, but they wouldn’t have liked losing you to a girl. With her out of your life get back in with your tribe and enjoy sessions of dissing girls and lusting after new ones.
Always say Never Again
Just chalk it up as part of life's learning curve and be grateful that it happened to you early on in your love arc. You’ll wonder where it all went wrong and make a mental note not to go out with some screeching girlie like that again. Within six months you’ll be friends again and she’ll be wondering what she gave up. Tooo late. Never go back and always look forward.
More coming soon