Poetry

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Originally Posted by Wootzeh

doesnt make sense sorry how do you send words as empty calories?

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When does poetry ever make sense at first glance?[:
'tis a nice poem, keep it up

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Originally Posted by Daphne,

When does poetry ever make sense at first glance?[:
'tis a nice poem, keep it up

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If that was true then Wilde and the boys would never have sold any of their literature.

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Originally Posted by FlyingJesus

It's so looooonelyyyyyyy round the fieeeeelds of Athenryyyyyyy

I tried not to like it but couldn't do so as a poet lol, only problem I have is the repetition of "and" at the start of almost a quarter of the lines. I don't know if that was intended in
And malnourished bodies pack coffin ships
And stumble across the step
And end up in flat green fields
For continuity or flow, which is a nice idea, but when used with "and" it does seem a little childish (refer to how a child talks of a day's events). Other than that, and even in spite of that, a good read.

ps: Australia is rubbish

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The use of 'And' is deliberate to convey the repetitious trudgery of the issues raised in the poem.