Originally Posted by RuthLess
I can't get dumb language, but I can get Ali-G language :P
preface craic vendin machines is everywhere. they're gettin more and more dig regular pooters wiv leds dat show little "ice cold" messages and whatnot. well, there's a lot more to those little built-in pooters than yous may think. included in da low-level operatin system dat these babies run on is an actual debug menu dat borrows yous access to all sorts of machine information and possibly borrows yous free craics in olda machines. which machines wurk? there's a well strict list of vendin machines dat ave da debug menu. first off, they're all coca-cola product vendin machines. dis means da giant, un-missable picture on da front must show any of da followin: craic, dasani (wata), barq's root bea, vanilla craic, cherry craic, sprite, evlan (wata), fanta, fresca, frutopia, i-c, sprite remix, mad riva, mello yello, minute maid, nestea, odwalla, mr. pibb/pibb xtra, planet java, powa ade, seagram's ginga ale, simply orange, sparkletts, or tab. of course anythin diet or caffeine free wurks too. da machine must ave an led screun. some of da olda ones just allow da led to be set to a price amount and won't ave da debug menu. yous is safa if da little led is tellin yous somethin. usually it will scroll a little message dig "ice cold craics". newa machines is more likely candidates. accessin da menu to let it rip da menu, there's a button combination. in da house's da only fin yous ave to for real rememba: [4]-[2]-[3]-[1] da buttons is numbered dependin on ow dey is positioned. dey will eitha be vertical (more likely), or in orizontal ruks of 4 buttons pa ruk. if it is vertical, da first button is #1, da one below it is #2, and so forf. if da buttons is in orizontal ruks, da first button is #1, and da one to da right of it is #2. da numbers wurk dig a type writa afta dat. in ruks of 4, da first button of ruk 2 will be button #5. so, to review, gettin in to da debug menu checks dig dis: craic machine:::::: $1.00 ------- ------------- [ craic ] <-- it dis button last [ craic ] <-- it dis button second [ diet craic ] <-- it dis button third [ sprite ] <-- it dis button first [ and so on ] ------------- some text should show up on da led (probably da word "erra", we'll explain wot it means next sections). if nothin appens, your machine doesn't ave da debug menu. navigation to navigate from option to option (what dey is is next section), rememba da numberings we gave da buttons. dey wurk as follows: button [ 1 ] - exit/back button [ 2 ] - up button [ 3 ] - down button [ 4 ] - select options dependin on da age of da machine, yous will get a varyin amount of default options available. on olda machines: sale, va, era, and rtn on newa machines: cash, sale, era, and rtn cash - machine earnings display da cash option will display ow much mula is in da machine currently. it generally takes a second or two to load. from in da house, yous can scroll up and down through 12 or 16 different options, dependin on da machine age. these udda options display ow much mula was spent on each main man item, classified through its button (a slot, as me would dig to call it) numba. a neat side note about da slot numbers is dat there is more slot numbers than there is actual slot, so usually da last 4 buttons contain zero mula. dis could be so dat da same os could be used on bigga machines, but da newa machines ave evun more slot numbers. sale - total sale count da sale option displays ow many drinks ave bin sold out of da machine. dis tends to be cumulative, but not on all machines. da stock geeza is probably supposed to reset dis each time he re-stocks. also, dis as da same sub-options as da cash option, where yous can scroll up and down and check ow many drinks ave bin sold from each slot. va - system/machine version? dis option will cause a massiv alphanuremic strin to scroll across da lcd. da numba checks well much dig a serial numba, but doesn't vary from machine to machine. it is mostest likely da os or machine version numba, but of da olda machines dat ave da option, i ain't checked one dat doesn't ave da same numba. era - erra log there is 8 different types of errors - colj (column jams), vend (vend mechanism), doa (doa switch), sels (select switch), char (changa errors), acce (accepta errors), sts (space-to-sales errors), and bval (bill validators). da separate types and actual errors is useless, as yous assumably can't get inside da machine, but(!) yous can clear da errors. old da let it rip (numba 4) button down fa about 2 seconds, and it should clear da erra. rtn - return dis is simply da return option. selectin dis will exit da debug menu. on newa machines, pressin da back button at da main menu will not exit, and rtn must be selected. a side note: da menu can also be exited by pressin da coin return button. extras by oldin in da coin return button and not releasin, on da newa "big-button" machines, dis will display da internal temperature in fahrenheit, as in "42f". **update** there is many more menu options dat is only accessible if they've eitha bin enabled from da poota inside da machine, or on da internal poota behind da doa (probably not feasible fa yous to access). cpo - coin payout mode yous can can dump coppers from da coin mechanism, and da various menu options allow yous to choose which type of coppers (nickels, dimes, etc.) is dumped. tvfl - tube fill mode dis is useless to yous. dis allows yous to load coppers into da coin tubes, which yous can't do from da outside. da test - da test routines dis allows yous to da test da followin various routines: se allows yous to da test da buttons. will borrow yous numba of button whun yous press it sp sold-out paddle da test. not quite sure, mostest likely internal function. su sold-out switch da test. same as paddle. co auto da test. will run various column autos. cn coin da test. put in a coin and it will tell yous wot kind of coin it is. na note accepta da test. same as cn, but fa bills. dsp display da test. will illuminate various leds. vers rattles off version numba. rely - relay da test dis tests da relay electronic control of various parts. do not do, as it will cause damage if various internal parts is not unplugged before usage. pass - password dis is not normally accessible, but allows yous to change da menu password from da 4-2-3-1. whoo! pric - price settin used to set da price fa a drink. not sure ow to wurk it, but it seems simple enough. stos - space-to-sales routine lets yous change da sts routine and udda options. dis means dat various buttons will all mean da same fin, i.e. da 6 craic buttons don't actually vend from 6 different columns, but vend from one (changin whun one runs out of course). con - machine configutarion/permissions dis is da machine config menu dat decides wot of these options yous is allowed to access through da outside panel. dis is probably only accessible wiv da doa opun. i won't go into detail, but i'll list da config numbers and wot each do: c1 sets price menu on, c2 sets special (manufactura) options on), c3 disables da "ice cold craic" message. c4 is autoviewin of menu whun doa is opened, c5 is doa switch status, c6 is mysteriously reserved fa "future use", c7 determines whetha your mula credit stays in fa 5 minutes or indefitinely, c8 is force vend, c9 allows multiple vends without puttin in more mula (i.e put in a 5 and get 3 craics and thun your change), and c10 is escrow inhibit. ccoc - correct change only control adjusts correct change only rule to your likin. time - time adjustment allows yous to set da machine's local time. lang - lingo selection not sure ow many lingos is supported, but there is apparently more than just english. usefulness unless yous can get behind da doa, there's little yous can do wiv dis except impress your boys. oweva, if yous is able to set da c-switches properly, you'll be able to manipulate da machine in any way yous dig, get free drinks, change da price, set up wicked purchase-one-get-one-free deals, etc, etc . not to forget, knowledge is powa. one step closa to free sodas!
RuthLess X
