Physical Relationships

Does physical activity within a relationship ruin it altogether?

I have been with two girls in the last 6 months, it started to get physical in both relationships after around 2-3 weeks and then every time I went out, all I ever did was want more and more physical activity. I would count the night wasted if I hadn't got something off the girl.

Now, with a different girl who I've been trying to get with, I count every minute as heaven that I am with her. I am scared to try and touch her and even a kiss gets me excited.

Does this feeling depend on the girl you are going out with? And does physical activity become addictive and ruin a relationship? Anybody else had the same experience?

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Originally Posted by Adzeh

Does physical activity within a relationship ruin it altogether?

I have been with two girls in the last 6 months, it started to get physical in both relationships after around 2-3 weeks and then every time I went out, all I ever did was want more and more physical activity. I would count the night wasted if I hadn't got something off the girl.

Now, with a different girl who I've been trying to get with, I count every minute as heaven that I am with her. I am scared to try and touch her and even a kiss gets me excited.

Does this feeling depend on the girl you are going out with? And does physical activity become addictive and ruin a relationship? Anybody else had the same experience?

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When you say you get 'ecited' every time you kiss her, do you mean physically or mentally? ;] - Cause that's a whole different kettle of fish!

Anyway, in some instances I'd say that yes, in some relationships I've been in that have became physical just simply ended in tears. Sometimes it just ends up that, that's the only reason you want to be with that person, and you forget the whole reason what the relationship is about, love.

I say, if your worried about ruining the relationship, you need to hold off for a bit. Speak to this girl and explain to her how you really like her and feel you're ready to do things (if you are), and if she feels the same then go for it. But don't just do it for the hell of it, if you don't really have strong feelings for her - otherwise it'll all end it tears!

Let me know how it goes mate! ;] :]

It does depend on the girl, because obviously you won't feel exactly the same about each girl, and sometimes you may find yourself being with someone simply for the physical side of the relationship. However, all is not lost. In my experience relationships do go through a stage where just about the only thing that happens is humpin' and bumpin', and after a while you might think to yourself that it's going nowhere, but you just have to ride it out (or if you prefer, let the girl ride it out :D) and it will slow down after a while.

With this new girl of yours, don't be worried about the kisses exciting you, it's a good thing. If even small things like that get you going, then if you do decide to take things further you'll enjoy it all the more for savouring each moment. Physical activity doesn't ruin a relationship, and for long-term relationships it's essential, just try not to be too greedy with it ^_^

I think getting physical helps a relationship. It brings you much closer to each other.

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Originally Posted by Scotland

I think getting physical helps a relationship. It brings you much closer to each other.

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As long as both parties feel they are ready to and realise the consequences.

Nobody answered on eof the questions.

Is it just m or do alot of people just go out and 'do things' for the sake of it?

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Originally Posted by Adzeh

Nobody answered on eof the questions.

Is it just m or do alot of people just go out and 'do things' for the sake of it?

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Some people might but it is not like that in most cases :)

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Originally Posted by Adzeh

Nobody answered on eof the questions.

Is it just m or do alot of people just go out and 'do things' for the sake of it?

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Well, I'm sure you've heard of one night stands. Trust me, a hell of a lot of people do, do it! They go out purposely looking to find one person to have a physical relationship for that one night only, and in fact it's actually a huge problem in this country as it leads to alot of sexually transmitted deseases etc.

I'd say it's more common in 18+ year olds, who go out clubbing and meet folk. But I know a lot of people around 14 - 16 who do the same sort of thing, so yeh I'd say it was common - but remember that doesn't make it alright or a good thing to do! ;]

Physical activity can spoil or help depending on how far you are in the relationship. Try 6 months of doing nothing lol.

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Originally Posted by Gemma

Physical activity can spoil or help depending on how far you are in the relationship. Try 6 months of doing nothing lol.

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I can sympathise with that -_-' Edit: The subheading under your name is well good haha.

I read through the "successful marriage" counselling book that my mum got before getting married last summer, and part of it does mention the physical side, saying (and I quote ^_^):

"Sex is not just the icing on the cake, it's a vital ingredient"

Check that, what a fantastic analogy.

Well I've been with my current girlfriend for over 7 months and no physical part to the relationship. This might be due to it being long distance but tbh I'm not that bothered and haven't felt the need to go 'physical' with anyone else either because it doesn't appeal to me without meaning to the relationship. Yeah I do intend on getting physical in the future with my partner but if you think about it the longer you wait the more you look forward to it? Otherwise you can spoil the physical part of the relationship by having it too soon. Plus if you wait longer you get more of a 'tingle' when you are going to do it because you've been waiting so long for it. Well I haven't had much physical action in life, just a few former relationships with girls that as you can see didn't last. I prefer to less-physical side to the relationship, apart from hugging,kissing and holding hands. I'd rather sit and talk with a girl and have fun than constantly be thinking about and wanting sex with her as it would just spoil and ruin it. Sounds to me like you might be obsessive with physical side, either that or I'm just different to most guys.

okay well, physical relationships.. are what makes it a girl and boyfriend relationship the sexual atraction.

so its okay. but when it goes down the road that you are huffy because "you aint getting any" its wrong.. you need to like the person before the phsyical stuff

thats a good relationship.

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Originally Posted by FlyingJesus

I can sympathise with that -_-' Edit: The subheading under your name is well good haha.

I read through the "successful marriage" counselling book that my mum got before getting married last summer, and part of it does mention the physical side, saying (and I quote ^_^):

"Sex is not just the icing on the cake, it's a vital ingredient"

Check that, what a fantastic analogy.

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I wouldn't say sex is a vital ingredient. Sure it's great but it isn't the most important part of a relationship. Being together, loving eachother is the main thing of it.

I think it meant vital in the way that long-term relationships don't work well without it in modern relationships.

I've been with my girl for 4 weeks exactly to the date. Since May 15th, and it was only last week we started doing 'stuff'. By stuff I will explain it how you most probably know it. 'Snogging (or for some of you, getting or or tonguing)', 'feeling the areas' etc.. It hasn't ruined my relationship whatsoever and still, ever moment I spend with her I feel as if we're in heaven.

It only shows you love her. Just don't go to far and check with her that everything you do to her or with her is comfortable with her.

Works with me.

If its you thats making the first move towards the physical side of a relationship, make sure tis not really early on and you know her well. You dont want her feeling as though she is being used.

But if its a mutual decision then its fine :)

- Tank

P.S Keep it wrapped;)