I Feel Sooo Bad

This was taken from Olleh's thread.

Okay, so me and my dad are not that close. He isn't home a lot and we don't talk much. I live with both parents though. Me and my mom are VERY close.

I don't really love my dad. It's kinda like I don't know him. He's kinda like a man who lives with me. That's it. I feel bad cause when I say I love you, I know I'm lying and I hate being around him. I do things just to start arguments with him. I don't know why I feel this way. I hate it. I feel sooo bad. :( I don't know what to do.

Anyone feel this way?

im the complete opposite,

why dont you just try to bond with him.

spend some father daughter time with him.

yea

i struggle to even be nice to my dad
but hes not nice to me, so yeah.

I'm like that sometimes, it's like I'm either shuting myself away and don't speak to him or he does the same so he's at work and then he's shutting himself away so I never speak to him. But, then other times I do and we go out places and stuff.

You just need to bond with him, spend sometime with him, find something you both like and go out and do it.

But it just feels sooo weird around him. I get shy and don't know what to do. It's like I have this strong hate towards him. It feels like it's too late for us to get close. I'm 13 but like, I don't know. I really want to be close with my dad but the littlest things he does bothers me. I try to stop but I really can't.

Try telling your dad how you feel.

I'm like this with my mum. Maybe you should go somewhere with him, for lunch or out shopping, watch his programmes with him etc, just try to get to know him and try to be his friend.

This could be expected from of his lack of appearance in your life and the natural connection you would have with your mother enforced by this and also because of the gender connection. The connection can be improved by spending more time with him and such, but without actually knowing you, I wouldn't like to make assumptions.

I'm like this with my Dad, but I'm leaving in September for Uni and our relationship is just improving, so my relationship will probably be the same for the rest of our lives, maybe a bit better with maturity later in life.

I feel like this about my dad, I know I don't need him for anything.. he's just this person who lived with me when I was younger..

Dads can be amazing, dads can be complete and utter twits.

They're like marmite, I reckon;
Love them or hate them.

With my Dad, he has only been around in my life since the past few years of my life, and I like having him around. Although, I know what he's done to my mum, and it just always lingers in the back of my mind when I talk to him.

But I know, at the end of the day, he's my dad and i'll only get one chance to make it work.

You could try talking to him, if you think you can do it. Or just suggest that you do something together. Although you may not think you'll enjoy it, you'll be surprised.

You'll only really be able to fix this completely if he knows how you're feeling. If he doesn't know it's broken, how can he fix it?

But it works both ways. See how he feels. See what he suggests you should do.

It's up to you what you do next,
It's yours and your dad's relationship.

;].
Jay x

I know what my dad did to my mom too. In the back of my mind I know I don't need him for anything...

I hear what you guys are saying, like I know what I'm doing is wrong but it's like I can't bring myself to do it. It's like when you're paralyzed and you want to walk but you just can't. I don't have the best relationship with him as I said and I just can't talk to him and tell him that. It's hard for me. :( And I feel absolutely horrible. I don't want it to be like this and when I grow up, we end up not being close.