Do you think you can "fall out of true love".

I'm bored and I thought this would be an interesting debate.

I hear people say "We just fell out of love" or "the feelings went away" etc. and I just don't understand how. 'Cause I'm sure the same people would claim originally that it was "true love", but I simply don't think that you can lose that feeling for someone. I personally believe that anyone who says that is either;

A) Kidding themselves and deep down still knows they have feelings but just hides it.
B) Only had feelings of passion and not "true love".
C) Or faced some kind of severe emotional damage from the person which really was enough to convert the feelings from love > hate.

I've just never understood how "true love" can end (I can't put it less soppier lmao) simply because "feelings went away".
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I dunno just thought it'd be something interesting to debate.

I don't think true love ever goes away. True believer of that! If you say you're in love and then say you're not, I don't think you were in the first place. You never, no matter what in my opinion forget, or lose love for your first or true love, you just learn to deal with the fact it's over and move on in terms of feelings, but you'll always have that little bit. I know I will with my ex!

People who haven't been in love will just say you can, but until you experience it, you won't ever know!

I don't think true love goes away, and I think people are quick to use the word love.

True love is true love. You can't just "fall out of it".

I think that people say that they've lost their feelings for a person after saying that it was true love because they misused the term. If you truely love someone, it will never fade. You truly love someone when you've seen their character and personality and what they're like on the inside, and accepted them for everything that they are. You can't take true love back. If you say that you truly love someone and your relationship doesn't work out, then you didn't actually "truly" love them.

Way too many people throw around the term "love", and even more throw around the term "true love". That's my $0.02.

Of course you can, people change constantly and it's ridiculous to think that 2 (or more) people who are in love will always remain the exact same. I'm not the same person I was last week let alone a few years ago, and to delegitimise feelings I've had in the past just because I no longer feel them seems totally ridiculous. As for people saying that the word love is thrown around too much, I'd argue the exact opposite - people are so scared of letting themselves feel that they put "love" on some pedestal well above what it ought to be; it should be something to embrace and celebrate, not hide from and ridicule people for

You learn to move on, I don't think you ever fall out of love with them, like you said, you change and just learn to live life without them for whatever reason.

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Originally Posted by FlyingJesus

Of course you can, people change constantly and it's ridiculous to think that 2 (or more) people who are in love will always remain the exact same. I'm not the same person I was last week let alone a few years ago, and to delegitimise feelings I've had in the past just because I no longer feel them seems totally ridiculous. As for people saying that the word love is thrown around too much, I'd argue the exact opposite - people are so scared of letting themselves feel that they put "love" on some pedestal well above what it ought to be; it should be something to embrace and celebrate, not hide from and ridicule people for

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There's always a place in your mind for them, sure, but that's just nostalgia for the people that you used to be. I've been in love, and I still know the girl and every now and then you get pangs for it but I know that what I'm really missing is the person I used to be's feelings for the person she used to be - if we got together again now it wouldn't work at all because we quite simply are not those people any more

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Originally Posted by e5

You learn to move on, I don't think you ever fall out of love with them, like you said, you change and just learn to live life without them for whatever reason.

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i think that's ********, you can fall OUT of love with someone but you might always LOVE them ie care about them, wish for the best etc. the same way you'd love a friend or family member.

if you look at evolutionary psychology or just the psychology of love it makes perfect sense to fall out of love. your brain/instincts etc find your perfect match, brain chemistry n all that shizzle keeps the two of you together long enough to have a baby so obviously has to be processes which keep you two together (affection, bonding, feeling like u can't be away from them blahblah). there's studies suggesting that this period ends after 18month-2 year then you simply fall out of love OR u move onto the attachment phase.

i believe this 'true love' (which u can have for anyone therefore u can fall for another person afterwards) if it does exist is more about choosing to stay with a person. for example, grandparents are together longer than recent generations because they were expected to marry and settle for life. they choose to stay together whereas now we have choice and can go from one to another.

there's biochemistry love then there's choosing to love. id say the second is 'true love'. wish i could explain my thoughts lol but check out science of love if u can and it explains how u fall in love n fall out.

I don't believe "true love" exists. I think people try to fool themselves and want their life to be like a book or a film so they tell themselves that this other person is their one "true love".

To me, this then means you can't fall out of "true love" if you've never fallen in :P

You can't fall out of true love. That's an oxymoron.

True love does not exist. Only love. Whether that love continues for all your life depends on you and your partner. If you lose your partner, there'll always be someone else even if you didn't get a chance to meet 'em.
If 'true love' did exist, it would most certainly not be your true love if you fall out of it? :P

Of course you can fall out of love... Like @FlyingJesus; said people change daily. It also depends completely on circumstances and what is going on in your lives and your partners lives, different experiences change people and sometime for the worse.

I believe that true love can both exist and that you can also fall out of love.

Picture it like this. You meet someone and it's great you go out for years and eventually get married but something changes. Maybe one of the people in the relationship does something that the other doesn't agree with, maybe something happened and they've went down a path of destruction. You could fall out with this person and hate what they have become that doesn't mean it wasn't proper love in the past.

Things can end between things other than just falling out of love. As long as the break up isn't horrifically messy then I think there's always something there but if there's something seriously wrong which ends the relationship like cheating then I think feelings can dry up - but then you'd debate whether that was true love.

Nope.

My mum and dad used to be in love, now they hate eachother. But they still carry strong feelings for eachother. Even if my dad acts like a ****.

So maybe you won't still be in true love, but you will still love eachother. If you see what I mean?

Can someone define what true love is?

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Originally Posted by Shar

Can someone define what true love is?

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I don't think it can be defined because its different for everyone

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Originally Posted by peteyt

I don't think it can be defined because its different for everyone

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That's my point though. How can someone know what "true love" really is.
I do think you can stop loving someone or stop loving them in a romantic way but still love them as a friend.

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Originally Posted by Shar

That's my point though. How can someone know what "true love" really is.
I do think you can stop loving someone or stop loving them in a romantic way but still love them as a friend.

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I think true love exists in a moment. I love my girlfriend and interestingly we dated before but didn't really know each other at the time and decided to remain friends its only know we know each other a lot we've given it another try. Obviously there was something still there when we where friends, but at the same time if she was to cheat on me, I'd probably hate her and my feelings would diminish.

Like others have said, I think it all depends on what would be classed as 'true love' really. Sometimes you may think you love someone and it may seem nothing will ever get in the way with that but you can never be 100% sure and thats just life really.

But on the other hand, I guess its possible to have true love for someone in some respects, or totally respect and cherish everything about them. I personally don't believe its possible to get rid of these kind of feelings when they get that strong no matter how hard you try and no matter what happens. They could do everything in their power to upset you, destroy you or they could break your heart, but those feelings still would never go away, purely because they've become a part of you and undoing that is extremely hard.

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Originally Posted by peteyt

I think true love exists in a moment. I love my girlfriend and interestingly we dated before but didn't really know each other at the time and decided to remain friends its only know we know each other a lot we've given it another try. Obviously there was something still there when we where friends, but at the same time if she was to cheat on me, I'd probably hate her and my feelings would diminish.

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That's an interesting idea.

I personally think even you separate from someone who you truly loved it wouldn't be easy to stop loving them completely, but the way you love them would probably change. Again that just comes back to "different kinds of love".

I don't think you can fall out of love, but I think many people are mistakingly in love to begin with when they are not.