Social Rules

I responded to a thread about how I tend to ignore social rules/norms that I disagree with. Maybe you're the same or maybe you disagree with them but you go along with them anyway because it's easier/less weird/whatever. Either way, it made me wonder what social rules that you've come across in your life where you've thought 'hang on that makes no sense.'

I'll give a few examples that I don't agree with and I'll see if I can think of any more. Add your own and we'll see if a discussion gets going lol.

- You can't fancy that person cos I fancied him first and we're friends
Sorry girls - and it's mostly girls that have said this directly to me but I think most guys would agree - "mates before dates" being the clean version lol - but I don't think you can bagsy a person who has their own thoughts, emotions and feelings and it's not your friend's fault if they fall in love. I don't doubt for a minute that it'd suck hugely if you were the third wheel in that triangle but I don't think it'd be worth losing a friendship over.

- Keep up with the latest trends/technology
I don't have a mobile phone and I'm in a huge minority here but I think they're largely overrated and the costs outweigh the benefits. What I find even more perplexing is this need to keep up to date with the newest releases as if they are in any way better than the phone you've already got (and probably not even had for very long before the next one comes out).

Which social rules do you disagree with?

some social rules i dont agree with off the top of my head:

"don't date your mates exes" ~ ?? sorry you don't own them
"don't show that you're upset" ~ no, cry if u need to
"don't fight back" ~ nah ignoring bullies only ever made the problem worse for me, i always wish i defended myself more

i'm the same with mobile phones i cba with them. cba with technology in general if i'm honest it really doesn't impress me it's just hassle.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by buttons

"don't fight back"

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My parents always taught me the opposite but I was really shy and not a fighter.... but eventually I put that into practice and fighting back really does work.

My grandma was always obsessed with me acting "ladylike".
She used to tell me off for throwing myself down on a chair too hard because it was manly lol. She always used to tell me off for walking like a man as well.

So when this tumblr post came around it made me laugh so much:
http://41.media.tumblr.com/abb7b702c...uzko1_1280.jpg

Seriously asking here, why do you not have a mobile phone? Not talking like hundreds of pounds worth but surely a cheap one from Asda is good to have at the very least?

Either way I just do my own thing, whether that lines up with any social rules or not I haven't a clue.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by buttons

"don't date your mates exes" ~ ?? sorry you don't own them

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(Sorry i don't mean to start an argument or anything)
That rule means alot to me personally.. If i have split up with someone and i still missed them / wanted them and one of my mates dated them when they knew that.. I wouldn't class them as a mate. I would class them as two-faced and completely out of order.

If i split up with them and there was no feelings then it would be different, that would be fine.


I don't really have anything else that i feel that strongly about.

just in my opinion if i was in love with someone, they in love with me, & my friend couldn't get over them, would it be fair for them to say im a bad friend etc when they're getting in the way of my happiness? i understand that it's a social rule for a reason but i personally won't follow it if it was someone i loved, maybe if it was just someone i wanted a one night stand with then i could forget them.

- - - Updated - - -

one time this guy was trying it with my friend for ages n she kept rejecting him so i went for him n we started getting together. after that she was saying she liked him n telling ppl im a bad friend but he was never 'hers'. also ironic cause am p sure she was seeing my ex like a week after we stopped seeing each other (his name popped up on her phone) and she slept with her cousins ex when they were talking about getting back together lmao

I'm not really the most social person, so I probably couldn't even tell you half of these "social rules" things!

I agree with Mike that it's stupid with people being obsessed with the latest fashion, technology etc. I don't own a mobile phone either, nor do I keep up to date with any of the latest technology, nor do I care for any type of fashion - I just buy what I want (and what's cheapest!) because I don't really see the point in getting a bunch of expensive needless things. Some people just get these things to show off to their friends or whatever, I don't know.

Oh and yes - that whole "ignore bullies", "don't fight back" etc is nonsense. If you get the chance, and it doesn't make you sound stupid or come out too late, say something really hurtful back to a bully. If you get hit, hit them back harder - assuming you're capable.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Empired

My grandma was always obsessed with me acting "ladylike".
She used to tell me off for throwing myself down on a chair too hard because it was manly lol. She always used to tell me off for walking like a man as well.

So when this tumblr post came around it made me laugh so much:
http://41.media.tumblr.com/abb7b702c...uzko1_1280.jpg

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LMAO pretty much the story of my life, although it's more of "wear a skirt/dress", "your hair is too short", "wear heels" bla bla bla

i kinda agree with jen with the dating your friend's ex thing, you can't help who you fall for. although it depends on the circumstances i guess. my friend started dating my ex within days after we'd split after she'd convinced me to end things with him because of things that had happened and i thought that was rly uncool. however, if she hadn't tried to split us up for ages and just kinda got together with him after things ended then i wouldn't have cared, if that makes sense?

other things are

• i don't really keep up with clothing fashion and still get questioned as to why i wear my vans with dresses
• i don't wear make-up (with an exception of a night out or something, and even then it's just eyeliner) and i don't curl/straighten my hair. idk i don't understand why some people spend ages perfecting their makeup/hair only to walk down the road to the shop and stuff because by the time they've finished i'd have been and came back from the shop. plus i set my alarm 15 mins before i leave in the morning for work because it's enough time for me to shower, get dressed and leave. if i woke up 15 mins/1 hour before i left then yeah i could do all that before i left, but i'd prefer having that extra 45 mins of sleep lmao.
• i don't go out drinking (unless i'm meeting up with someone and we go out, like i do with @Martin;). i'd much rather drink in the house, order pizza and play video games.
• i don't watch films. idk they last too long and i get distracted so easily then i miss important things and don't bother going back to see what i missed. apart from spider man, i've not seen a super hero film and i've never seen a james bond film, which shocks a lot of people. i watch loads of tv shows, but if i watch a film then i'd have to be really bored and chances are i won't make it to the end before switching it over.

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Originally Posted by Inseriousity.

- Keep up with the latest trends/technology
I don't have a mobile phone and I'm in a huge minority here but I think they're largely overrated and the costs outweigh the benefits. What I find even more perplexing is this need to keep up to date with the newest releases as if they are in any way better than the phone you've already got (and probably not even had for very long before the next one comes out).

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Do you not find it odd/struggle not having a mobile phone? I mean it makes it easier to contact people especially if you are out of the house. And if you have a cheap £10 phone with pay as you go, the cost is minimal.

It is odd in the sense that it's not that common anymore. Even my nanas have a mobile lol. I have had a mobile phone before (a cheap pay-as-you-go one) but I rarely used it and when I lost it, it really wasn't that big of a deal to me. I first got one "in case of emergencies" but emergencies are super rare and if you were in a genuine emergency, the likelihood of being able to use your phone is nil. I hate talking on phones as I always feel deaf so that leaves texting. On a cheap phone that involves the old method of typing the number multiple times for each letter so sending a message is a slow, painful process and on the smartphones my fingers end up hitting the wrong letter so sending a message is a slow, painful process. So that leaves all the apps and internet browsing but I do that when I'm inside the house, why would I want to keep doing it outside? I might as well stay in my warm comfy house rather than trying to scan through facebook outside.

I have never found it a struggle to contact people mainly because it is entirely possible to arrange something without a phone, I don't need to be in contact with everyone 24/7, it means we have more to talk about when we actually do see each other, I am very independent and tend to get by without the need to phone so and so to come pick me up (public transport is always available) or to check in and say I'm okay (they'll know I'm okay when I see them) or tell them where I'm going (I can tell them beforehand).

Then finally you're in a group of friends and EVERY SINGLE DAMN ONE OF THEM is on their phones. Oh. my. God. You do not need to use your phone now. Every tweet, facebook update, text message, game app will still be there when you get home. When someone's got a mobile phone, there's this constant need to have to be up to date with everything. If you have a phone you probably send hundreds of texts but I bet most of them have no sense of urgency and they could all wait til you actually see them face-to-face (or go home and talk to them on the much more convenient computer/laptop lol).

That is why I don't bother with one.

i agree with dont date your friends ex's thats nasty

http://ih0.redbubble.net/image.82968...,ffffff.u2.jpg