Male trouble sadly

[Macey]

Lately my boyfriend has been driving me round the bend so to speak!
Were both 19, full time workers whos shifts sadly mean we spend alot less time together as we used to at the start of the relationship (8months+) but lately we have become distant and everything we do irritates each other.

Hes never been the 'romantic type' (his idea of a date is COD) and hes a blunt individual (if he thinks something looks ugly on me he WILL say I look ugly in it or if hes angry he will tell me to shut my backside up)

The other day he told me that he thinks im a (alternative name for a cat) and always jokes to his mates about my looks and degrading me infront of them all the time. I rang him today after work since i really wanted to speak to him about private matters at home but all he did was call me offensive names and i could hear a group of lads laughing in the background.

I pay for meals out, I always travel to his place (baring in mind hes been to mine what 5 times in 8months) and I keep my distance when needed (girly nights out, he has his mates round)

Im just starting to feel he doesnt take me or the relationship seriously, what do you guys think?

[dirrty]

discuss how you feel with him, if he doesn't care/change then end it.

[ChickenFaces]

I'm going to be really serious here, if he doesn't care about the relationship now he most likely won't care too much later on. Tell him if he doesn't shape up he'll be short a girlfriend and he'll just have sausage fests for a long time. No girl deserves a guy like that, no matter what you deserve someone that appreciates you and loves you and wants to be around you and not his friends. And when he's with his friends he doesn't speak about you like a piece of meat. It's not right. You'll find someone so much better and when you do, you'll look back at that idiot that's still playing COD and say: Lol what a loser.

[lol]

you can do better.
you should do better.

[Neversoft]

you can do better.
you should do better.

Indeed. Sounds to me like he doesn't deserve someone like you.

[Fiendly]

discuss how you feel with him, if he doesn't care/change then end it.

Sometimes change doesn't happen so quickly.
But I do agree with you, talk to him about it.. Have a proper discussion and if he doesn't take interest and seems to keep going..

Then find someone else or 'take a break'.

[Stephen]

why ask what we think after summing up an arse__

[FlyingJesus]

we have become distant and everything we do irritates each other.

You kinda summed it up yourself, why would you stay in a situation like that?

[Samantha]

discuss how you feel with him, if he doesn't care/change then end it.

I think she tried to talk to him and he called her offensive names.

I think he's in the stage where his friends come before you. He may have grown up in a rough household and he may think it's the norm to treat people he loves like crap. However, that is not the way and as it seems you can't speak to him as he appears abusive to you then the other option is to end it. You've been together a fairly long time and now he should know everything about you, he should want to spend time with you for no particular reason, he should make the effort and if he can't do that then so be it. He will have to face the consequences. Just remember, it's not your fault because if it does end he could always try place the blame on you.
Then there is that moment after the break up where it may hit him hard. He may beg you to take him back, he may beg you that he will change, but usually that doesn't last, it may change for a couple of weeks or months then something happens what gets him back on the band wagon with his friends.
Just do what you think is right.

[Catzsy]

I am normally one to suggest discussing what you have said here with him but on this occasion I would say he is not worth it as he presently is. No-one should treat anybody like that - it's just a one way relationship. He has no respect and you most definitely deserve better. He needs dumping from a high place. Perhaps he will come to his senses then.