I Hate The Sound Of My Own Voice

[jorsian]

Recently I tried recording my voice out of curiosity and the results really struck a chord with me. I noticed that the recorded version of my voice (what everyone hears and knows my voice to sound like) is much higher than the interior sound of my voice, which I've known myself to sound for my entire life. Not only this, but my voice isn't very clear either. My thoughts are clear and I know what I want to say, but I can't seem to pronounce words with as much clarity as I see other people are able to do.

I always noticed this about myself earlier in life and attributed it to young age, but now that I'm 20 I feel like I'm stuck with this voice for the rest of my life. To make matters worse, no matter how hard I try I can't seem to speak as clearly or deeply as other men my age. I noticed that I have an especially hard time pronouncing words like "change" and "she", and I often stutter when trying to pronounce these words. I practice speaking to myself daily, repeating problem words over and over again, but to no avail.

It's really done a number on my self-confidence, and I think it's one of the reasons I can't seem to make friends or find a job easily. I really hate the fact that it's affecting me in all areas of the real world and I want it to change, but I don't know if it will.

Should I accept myself for who I am or seek professional help?

[Kyle]

If it is having effect in other areas as you say then speech therapy could be one avenue for you to go down. I don't think you're alone in not recognising or particularly liking your own voice though, anybody that has heard a recording of themselves will tell you the exact same thing. The more you speak and hear yourself the more used to your voice you will get so the best way to tackle this problem is to talk a lot to real people rather than to yourself be it via skype or djing on habbox or with actual people in real life. Start with parents and close friends and build from there.

I got told by like 2 people once that I sounded kinda gay and it bothered me a bit because I'm not a fan of being given labels by those that don't know me, especially when it might jeopardise my chances with girls who might encounter me in future and think I'm gay! but changing your voice isn't difficult and if you want to speak deeper or clearer then all you gotta do is start off slow and work from there. After spending a long time talking casually to people online and listening back to recordings I have managed to perfect my voice and am now the proud owner of the most sexy macho manly voice at habbox. basically, talk more and listen less, unless it's to your own voice, then listen more and tweak as needed.

[buttons]

Recently I tried recording my voice out of curiosity and the results really struck a chord with me. I noticed that the recorded version of my voice (what everyone hears and knows my voice to sound like) is much higher than the interior sound of my voice, which I've known myself to sound for my entire life. Not only this, but my voice isn't very clear either. My thoughts are clear and I know what I want to say, but I can't seem to pronounce words with as much clarity as I see other people are able to do.

I always noticed this about myself earlier in life and attributed it to young age, but now that I'm 20 I feel like I'm stuck with this voice for the rest of my life. To make matters worse, no matter how hard I try I can't seem to speak as clearly or deeply as other men my age. I noticed that I have an especially hard time pronouncing words like "change" and "she", and I often stutter when trying to pronounce these words. I practice speaking to myself daily, repeating problem words over and over again, but to no avail.

It's really done a number on my self-confidence, and I think it's one of the reasons I can't seem to make friends or find a job easily. I really hate the fact that it's affecting me in all areas of the real world and I want it to change, but I don't know if it will.

Should I accept myself for who I am or seek professional help?

this is a common reaction
the voice we hear is not what other people hear, the recording is: "When you speak, vibrations from your vocal cords resonate in your throat and mouth, and some get transmitted and conducted by the bones in your neck and head. The inner ear responds to these just like any other vibrations, turning them into electrical signals and sending them to the brain. Whenever you speak, your inner ear is stimulated both by internal vibrations in your bones and by the sound coming out of your mouth and traveling through the air and into the ears.

This combination of vibrations coming to the inner ear by two different paths gives your voice (as you normally hear it) a unique character that other, “air only” sounds don’t have. In particular, your bones enhance deeper, lower-frequency vibrations and give your voice a fuller, bassier quality that’s lacking when you hear it on a recording."

the reason you dislike it is because you're used to hearing your voice through your ears and not someone else's so you don't recognize it. it is the same with seeing yourself, the person you see in the mirror is not the same as pictures because in the mirror your face is flipped, what you see as the left side of your face is actually the right. there's a study showing we prefer images of us flipped like wed seen in a mirror (do u ever take pics of yourself and flip the image or use cameras that are flipped? the camera at the front of smart phones are flipped) yet people who know us prefer the unedited real image. it is probably the same with your voice. people will prefer your real voice and you will prefer what you've heard your whole life.

i agree with kyle, one way you can overcome this is to listen to it and get used to it. you'll probably cringe the first few times but afterwards you'll recognize it. i recorded myself a few times for presentations etc and by getting used to my voice, i started to like it and it made me feel better when talking for some reason? You might find you're stuttering or unable to pronounce clearly because you're worried people are hearing your voice and mocking it? maybe slow down when you're trying to pronounce? but tbh it's not a big deal, ive noticed people don't pronounce fully and no-one notices, you just carry on and even though they haven't pronounced it properly, you can still understand what they're saying. I know people who stutter also but by becoming preoccupied with it you will become more aware of it and stutter more

you can do both! you can accept that's your voice, that you can't pronounce some words fully but therapy can help you change your perspective on your voice and life in general. CBT is very good for that. i think it would be more effective than speech therapy because there's a possibility you get speech therapy and still don't like yourself and consequently yourself. I don't think there's a need to change yourself but if you think it will help then there's no harm trying to but do u really want to have to actively change your voice every conversation u have? better to change your perspective imo.

[KingEvan]

At least your not Andy Milonakis. He is 38 but he has a disease where he looks and sounds like a adolescence child.