My Teenage Daughter Is A Nightmare!!

[Addie]

Chapter Two-

Robyn made Sarah trip up and drop her dinner. So Sarah stood up with the plate and threw it at Robyn. Their mum came in and shouted ''SARAH! ROOM! NOW!'' Sarah kicked Robyn and said ''IT WAS HER FIRST'' ''SARAH!'' Her mum shouted. Sarah ran into her room. ''Right, 4pm. Ill get ready''She said to herself. She put her make-up on, done her hair and got dressed. Her mum came in and said ''SARAH. NO GOING OUT TONIGHT!'' Then left. About an hour later Sarah climbed out her window. Her mum went into her room. ''ROBYN!'' She yelled. Robyn came through and said ''Well, I hate her but we should look for her!'' So Robyn and their mum went out looking for Sarah. Meanwhile. Sarah and her friends were at Club Ice drinking. At about five am Sarah sneaked into her window and went to sleep. This went on for months until her mum saw an ad on tv saying ''IS YOUR TEEN A NIGHTMARE? Call this number'' Here mum phoned it. About a week later a woman phoned Kim [Their mum] and told her about it. Then Kim packed and went to a hotel. That day the woman on the phone [Jo] Knocked on the door.....

Chapter three is in 3 days.

[SHEEPY]

Erm.. ....

[beth]

I don't like it ;D

Okaii -edit- That was a little harsh, I'll explain why ;

1. Your sentences are too short for my liking.
2. I cannot work out what narrative you're using.
3. I cannot work out which tense you're using.

[Adam$]

Erm.. ....

yes, and the point in that post was..?

[mynameishelen!]

I don't like it ;D

Okaii -edit- That was a little harsh, I'll explain why ;

1. Your sentences are too short for my liking.
2. I cannot work out what narrative you're using.
3. I cannot work out which tense you're using.

Same. And go on a new line when people are talking! I'm easily confused

[Addie]

Same. And go on a new line when people are talking! I'm easily confused

Okk. Sorry. Ill do that on Chapter 3.

[YellowParasol]

Erm.. ....

Spamming to get your Post Count up i see...

[Addie]

Ive started a Santa story so Ill continue this one after Christmas