Things to make you go hhmmm

[FlyingJesus]

1) Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

You don't grow hamburgers in fields in America.

2) The Scarecrow got a brain, Tin Man got a heart, Lion got courage, Dorothy got home, what did Toto get?

**** all, the wizard hates that stupid dog for pulling the curtain open.

3) Since there is a speed of light and a speed of sound, is there a speed of smell?

Yes, it's carried on the wind.

4) What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?

Sheep can't count they're too stupid.

5) Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

Yes but they shouldn't.

6) Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime? << funi question

o lol!

7) Do fish get thirsty?

If they do they die.

8) When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?

Turns into dust, erasers pull up a section of the page init.

9) How come wrong numbers are never busy?

Because it's only the people who you reckon are you friends that don't want to talk to you.

10) Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?

In the pictures.

11) How do they get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass?

With a really long hammer.

12) Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

To make money.

13) Why are violets blue and not violet?

The dye you get from crushing them is violet.

[Swastika]

1. If a store is open 24/7 why are their locks on the doors?
Holidays and stuff

2. If a psychic can predict your future why do they ask you for your name?
So they know who you are ;] They could be thinking of the wrong person!
3. Before they invented drawing boards where did they go back to?
iunno
4. Why is it that a doctors work is called a practice?
It always has been, sounds more pro dont you think?
5. If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?
Because 100 degrees is boiling point wich would kill us with 3rd degree burns, obviously 98 degrees will also do this.
6. Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?
"Quick, run, the alarm is going on!" ;/
7. Why is the 0 on a phone after 1 and not before 1?
So its easier to press and to remember.
8. Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?
If you were called Charles, would you rather be called Charles or Charlie?
9. Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Not all sandwich meat is round, you can square smoked ham, kfnx.
10. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.
Proove it pls
11. Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.
Who cares?
12. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
Lovely
13. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
Proove it
14. 364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged Why is that ?
Because, its tradition to take candy and sweets on halloween, its like saying "dont take presents at christmas", its tradition.
15. Why is it that someone says head up when they mean for you to duck?
To see where the ball or whatever is? You dont just duck, it could just hit you on the back rofl, people look for it, then move.