Protective or obsessive?

[blackops121]

The beach thing is today. And I've been invited along to it too, I'm not sure whether its because she wants me there or because she wants to save the hassle of me being annoyed though.

I really don't want to seem like a bad person! I can't help it at all, I just get so scared i'll lose her, because she's very independant and doesn't like getting too close to people, and the fact she can get drunk sooo easily makes me think someone could try take advantage of that.

I'll take all this advice on board, Thankyou.

[Glen Coco]

are any of your friends going?

[Accipiter]

You's could have a week or a fortnight of a "break" where you can't talk to her etc, and it might help you trust her more too see that she is loyal when she's by herself for even longer times!

You want to hope she doesn't go on holiday, haha

[Jordy]

How ridiculous you're confronting her about going out with mates or drinking. It's totally up to her and if you carry on like that, no doubt her friends will begin to hate you and it'll all be downhill from there.

You understand the problem but you seem too obsessive to do anything about it. You've got to grow up a bit, trust her and let her do what she likes, you've no right to tell her what to do. I suspect you'll probably ignore me though and your relationship will end in a matter of days/weeks.

[blackops121]

It won't end in a matter of days/weeks. We've been together for 8 and a bit months now. We are too in love with each other for it to end just yet, But i'm wanting to be able to stop this before it gets out of hand and for her to eventually tell me its over.

[beth]

you need to let her live her life or you will lose her. i had an ex that didn't like me going out and didn't like my friends, and it really upset me because i had to be two different people at different times and in the end it willl crack the relationship and drive her away.

speak to her about it, maybe go out WITH her if you can't trust her. you'll see what she's like when she's out and you'll get reassurance. if you don't like what you see when yr out with her talk to her about it.

[Shar]

you need to let her live her life or you will lose her. i had an ex that didn't like me going out and didn't like my friends, and it really upset me because i had to be two different people at different times and in the end it willl crack the relationship and drive her away.

speak to her about it, maybe go out WITH her if you can't trust her. you'll see what she's like when she's out and you'll get reassurance. if you don't like what you see when yr out with her talk to her about it.

This is quite a good suggestion, you can go out with her and then try and slowly trust her to go out on her own.

[blackops121]

Yea, But one of the reasons I get so worried is because I've been out with her, I know what she acts like when she's drunk. When she's sober shes fine, I think I'd be able to trust her when she's sober fine, After trying for alittle while. But when shes drunk? I think it will be FAR more difficult. She can get too drunk too easily :/

[Matthew]

You say that you're very scared of losing her... Well if you carry on how you are then just that will happen. You need to let her have a life or you will lose her, simple as.

If she does things behind your back, then she obviously isn't right for you anyway.

[Zak]

I agree with Matt, if you carry on like you are you're more likely to lose her. I know it can be very hard to let her do things that make you feel uncomfortable without reacting, but really dude it's not worth it. If she likes you as much as you like her, she won't do anything.

From past experience half the time the situation(s) you're stressing about aren't as bad as you think they are. As for the drinking, if she's sensible with it there should be no problems at all & if she has a good group of friends they will look after her.

If she ever did anything, then you'd know that you two weren't meant to be I guess. You'd get over it