One thing that I can never fathom out?

[Accipiter]

I didn't make it out to be wide spread?! I even said i'm not even sure if it's a big thing or just something in my area.

If girls believe nice guys to be boring then thats just mental, there's plenty of nice guys out there that treat their girls to unpredictable things! All you need to do is be a dreamer, not a ***** really.

A female opinion on why they fall for it was what I mainly looked out for, because I already understood them wanting to change their boyfriends.

And if thats the case why are all females trying to create a perfect boy instead of finding one, in my eyes no one should change for anything.

"Seize a chance, follow a dream. Be yourself, don't plan and scheme."

[buttons]

there's a saying "nice guys finish last" which is definitely true - but mostly for teenagers. the tough, bad boys are only good for a temporary relationship and security or a one night stand. i can relate to wanting to tame the bad boy, i think many girls want to feel as though they're special enough to be able do that but as you get older you care less. also you'll see some girls go for the bad guys because they have no self-esteem and think they aren't good enough for anyone else (guilty) - & again sometimes having a jealous/possessive boyfriend makes you feel you're worth something. in the long term, you'll want a nice boyfriend (not too nice!) but short term or when you're younger, if you're nice you'll only get walked all over. i'm not gonna lie, i go for older guys because most my age are just out for sex but in the end it'll be the nice guy that has the decent relationship.

when a guy is too nice to me i'll totally walk all over them, flirt with other guys etc. i think it's the same with the bad guys and the vulnerable girls. the bad guy knows the vulnerable girl will always come back so he can do whatever he wants and will always have someone there when he needs them. i have more respect for myself now so i'll never go for a guy that treats me bad but i have before. guys can be respectful without telling girl's they're beauiful and sucking up to them, i really don't like that. ah well you can never win!

[Accipiter]

I understand that completely

I was quite surprised on another forum when a thread asked how much older / younger would you go for in a relationship

And I was surprised when girls of 16/17 said 19/20+, a lot seem to like a stable man, a one who can support them and has sorted out life, has cash behind them / prospects of a sped up life, someone to drive them around, a house of their own quicker etc!

I hate it when girls have low self-esteem, especially when beauty products and what not flash all this fake **** in front of them "be beautiful" when really its encouraging them to hide their natural beauty. Especially when it starts to limit the girls to their possibilities because they're more caring about looks than other prospects!

It's such a shame to see it happen, but like someone said earlier, I guess it's nature!

[Ardemax]

Tbh most the girls i treat crap, just come back for me, me and one girl have been on and off for so long now, even tho we just do stuff... winks and then i stop talking to her, she keeps coming back. i dont even have to make the first move.

Aren't you just an ideal gentlemen.

Regarding this thread, nice and smart guys are boring and not interesting, whilst jerks who are incapable of keeping to just one girlfriend at a time have the girls drooling on them.

That's life.

[Accipiter]

Personally I believe a guy can be nice while still being interesting, which is why I think a lot of girls go for band boys, because they are interesting and still come across nice (depending on which band you look at).

Being interesting or boring does not rely on yin yang in my eyes! Personally I wouldn't change myself to be a ***** to engage in short term relationships that potentially mentally scar your partner that you leave behind. Like i've always said I'd do, I waited until someone accepted me for who I am, rather than for someone they could make me into haha.

It's a pretty big downer on society when things like this happen, seeing a genuine girl being hurt & scarred by a down right "Bad Boy".

[buttons]

I understand that completely

I was quite surprised on another forum when a thread asked how much older / younger would you go for in a relationship

And I was surprised when girls of 16/17 said 19/20+, a lot seem to like a stable man, a one who can support them and has sorted out life, has cash behind them / prospects of a sped up life, someone to drive them around, a house of their own quicker etc!

I hate it when girls have low self-esteem, especially when beauty products and what not flash all this fake **** in front of them "be beautiful" when really its encouraging them to hide their natural beauty. Especially when it starts to limit the girls to their possibilities because they're more caring about looks than other prospects!

It's such a shame to see it happen, but like someone said earlier, I guess it's nature!

why are you surprised? if we're talking long term then men want a pretty, healthy, fertile woman to carry on their legacy so to speak whereas men tend to want financial security & a comfortable life for them and their children. woman are prettier, healthier and more fertile the younger they are (obviously after puberty) whereas men are more financially secure & experienced as they get older. not so sure about short term but it does seem like the bad guys going nowhere in life are usually only a temporary thing.

i totally agree with the whole fake business, my friend's dress provocatively with hooker heels and ***** eyelashes yet want guys to like them more than an easy lay?! i feel more sorry for the guys who think they've pulled a model but wake up with a monster. don't even get me started on girls who calls others ugly when they're the ones hiding their faces or when they say they don't care what guys think of them yet try to impress them through their looks. uch getting off topic but i feel fairly strongly about it

i also believe nice guys can be interesting but when you're wining & dining me, treating me like a queen and using all your cash on me then that's all i care about (errr.. the money i mean)>.

[Accipiter]

I tend to always find when you see a 16 year old (or similar) in a relationship with a 20+ year old it always seems weak and that the male doesn't really sound that stable. This is probably considering the area i'm from where the mass don't tend to find success due to poor education in the area (Ofsted had to recently straighten out the local school due to the appalling results etc)

I'm not shocked you feel strongly about such a thing, it must hurt to see female friends side tracked by this ideological beauty. I feel that girls who verbally abuse other girls on looks tend to have insecurities about themselves, they may to do it to ease their minds about their own insecurities etc, i'm not saying it's right, it's just what society has made them!

That kind of nice guy is easy to find, or atleast they're the ones you tend to see movies making a mockery of in date situations etc. But would you not be interested in a nice guy that is adventurous, who would rather take you around the world to see the beauty of the world.

There's a quote I found somewhere (I'm dangerous for quotes but I do love reading them):

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not."

It can probably be read in many different ways, but I find it says you must travel the world with the person you hold truly to ever find beauty in anything else. Because I find falling in love makes unexpected things become weirdly beautiful, probably very cheesy of me to say and soppy, but I find it to be true in myself!

[Wig44.]

Nice guys let girls walk all over them and get hung up over one girl. Jerks don't. It's simple really, don't let girls walk all over you and have more options. If you could be somewhere else with another girl they'll know and they'll want you more than if you had no other hope of a relationship besides her, bought her gifts and let her walk all over you.

[beth]

well this thread is very generalized. i'm not gonna stick around with someone who treats me like ****, because other people will treat me better ha.
this whole nicest guy thing is a myth, people don't mean "nice guys are boring" they mean "boring guys are boring". the nicest guy in the world could have a sense of humour and interests and he wouldn't seem all nice and boring.

but on the other hand, some girls just don't have a sense of humour. i don't get on well with females anyway, but, i find a lot of women are insecure.

[Accipiter]

well this thread is very generalized. i'm not gonna stick around with someone who treats me like ****, because other people will treat me better ha.
this whole nicest guy thing is a myth, people don't mean "nice guys are boring" they mean "boring guys are boring". the nicest guy in the world could have a sense of humour and interests and he wouldn't seem all nice and boring.

but on the other hand, some girls just don't have a sense of humour. i don't get on well with females anyway, but, i find a lot of women are insecure.

Glad all hope in the world isn't lost then LMAO

I find is disgraceful how the media creates insecurities in women, adverts like that should have been banned before smoking adverts where, it's a horrible thing to create in a mind.