Sexuality and causes?

[Shar]

I agree, you can't be born gay :S who you are develops with your everyday life.

[RandomManJay]

Its common for family members and those close to you to find and make up reasons to explain your sexuality, as in a way, although they may accept it, they may feel responsible in some way so they do it to try and eliviate that sense of responsibility and guilt. I think its known as "deflection" but I'm not sure.

Its sounds more or less like she's still coming to terms with it. If you really didn't like what she said, you can talk to her about it.

As for personal experiences. My parents don't know I'm bi, simply because the issue never comes up. They don't really care what I am as long as I'm happy, and comfortably independent. My friends know, but they really don't care either, the issue genuinely never comes up. One of my best friends is gay and he hasn't had a problem with it either, although before he came out, he would often get really embarrased and close himself off from the universe over the random, non-genuine homophobia me and my friend would hearl at each other (its a random insult game we made up, where we use insults which aren't considered acceptable in mainstream western society. Quite a boffin style game, but meh, we're geeks).

I've found that although sexuality is sort of a taboo thing in my hometown, when people are open about it, there really isn't a problem. But I have known people who have been treated horribly for being gay (for example: a friend of mine in america commited suicide after his sister told him he was a disgrace and an insult to her being gay. She pretty much pretended to accept him and be his lynchpin for 5-6years then doubled back and destroyed his entire view of the world (she's a complete religious nutter btw)).

The best thing to do is just wait for them to become comfortable with your sexuality, and tell them if you dislike or are uncomfortable with anything they do or say to you on the subject. Just because they haven't come to terms with it, doesn't mean it gives them the right to treat you negatively for it. They can't control what you are, just like you can't control how they feel about it.