Abuse: Parents smacking children.

[Lewis]

so what you're saying here is that as long as your kid says sorry they will get it back . that doesn't teach anything. you're going to take away a toy and your kid will just say sorry and you will give it back. and your kid will keep doing the same thing over and over.
And yes i have to admit you have some very good ideas there.

No I did not. I said as long as they're giving sincere apologies ALONGSIDE a time, perhaps a week slowly building up higher the more trouble they cause.

[Phil]

so what you're saying here is that as long as your kid says sorry they will get it back . that doesn't teach anything. you're going to take away a toy and your kid will just say sorry and you will give it back. and your kid will keep doing the same thing over and over.
And yes i have to admit you have some very good ideas there.

That's why you put a time limit or a chore to it by saying "you will get this back in 3 days so long as are well behaved" or "You will get this once you've completed a chore when you are asked" or something.

[!x!dude!x!2]

I haven't time to read that right now but I will tomorrow and talk about it then but I had a quick glimpse at the comments underneath and most disagreed with the article. Who cares if it's in a childcare setting? It still works? I'm not going to use time out technique in work and go home to my kids and beat them around the place because they're mine and I can do whatever

Beating is a whole different term here now. my friend use to get the belt when he was a kid. so compare the belt to a spank . you would pick the spank. for a time out chair i don't see how it works. i use to watch a lot of nanny911 (good show) and every time they put the kid on the time out chair they kid would get up and run. i'm not going to sit there with my child for 20 min while hes on time out. every kid is different . yes the time out chair may work . but other kids will think its a joke.

[Phil]

Beating is a whole different term here now. my friend use to get the belt when he was a kid. so compare the belt to a spank . you would pick the spank. for a time out chair i don't see how it works. i use to watch a lot of nanny911 (good show) and every time they put the kid on the time out chair they kid would get up and run. i'm not going to sit there with my child for 20 min while hes on time out. every kid is different . yes the time out chair may work . but other kids will think its a joke.

Okay, for using time out, you have a chair/cool down area or whatever it may be, really doesn't matter as long as it has no toys.
If a child is misbehaving, you warn them by saying something like "If you do that/misbehave again, you will go into time out"
If they do it again, you put them there for one minute per years old. So a 6 year old child would get six minutes.

You take them over and you sit them down, explain what they have done and why it is wrong and walk away - no interaction when in the chair
If they get up before their six minutes is up, you take them back and say "You need to stay here until I tell you it is okay to join the group or I will have to bring you back" and they start the six minutes again.

You obviously have to be patient as this can literally take hours sometimes.

Eventually the child will just realise that the only way they'll be allowed back to the group is if they do the time allotted.
When they have finished, you go to them and say "You have been put in time out because you hit Johnny with a wrench and that it wrong, we can't hit people, if you're upset with someone, you tell us and we will deal with it" and ask the child to apologise to Johnny and give him a hug

[!x!dude!x!2]

Okay, for using time out, you have a chair/cool down area or whatever it may be, really doesn't matter as long as it has no toys.
If a child is misbehaving, you warn them by saying something like "If you do that/misbehave again, you will go into time out"
If they do it again, you put them there for one minute per years old. So a 6 year old child would get six minutes.

You take them over and you sit them down, explain what they have done and why it is wrong and walk away - no interaction when in the chair
If they get up before their six minutes is up, you take them back and say "You need to stay here until I tell you it is okay to join the group or I will have to bring you back" and they start the six minutes again.

You obviously have to be patient as this can literally take hours sometimes.

Eventually the child will just realise that the only way they'll be allowed back to the group is if they do the time allotted.
When they have finished, you go to them and say "You have been put in time out because you hit Johnny with a wrench and that it wrong, we can't hit people, if you're upset with someone, you tell us and we will deal with it" and ask the child to apologise to Johnny and give him a hug

if 2 kids fight why would u make them hug that's just stupid . when 2 grown up fights you see the police making them hug out their differences.
but you see parents don't have " hours " to make sure their child in going to sit in the time out chair . parents have to cook dinner clean the house make sure they have everything ready for tomorrow make sure everyone is ready for bed. yes the time out chair does work sometimes but if your kid is just going to keep moving and its going to take you " hours" then you need a different solution

[Phil]

if 2 kids fight why would u make them hug that's just stupid . when 2 grown up fights you see the police making them hug out their differences.
but you see parents don't have " hours " to make sure their child in going to sit in the time out chair . parents have to cook dinner clean the house make sure they have everything ready for tomorrow make sure everyone is ready for bed. yes the time out chair does work sometimes but if your kid is just going to keep moving and its going to take you " hours" then you need a different solution

Not sure if the bolded bit was actually serious or not?

UHMM yeah but if parents don't have hours (hours would be rare, only with extreme kids like the ones on nanny911 or w.e) that doesn't mean they should resort to hitting?

[!x!dude!x!2]

Not sure if the bolded bit was actually serious or not?

UHMM yeah but if parents don't have hours (hours would be rare, only with extreme kids like the ones on nanny911 or w.e) that doesn't mean they should resort to hitting?

spanking.. hitting and beating and spanking are 3 different things . it wouldn't hurt the child

[Phil]

spanking.. hitting and beating and spanking are 3 different things . it wouldn't hurt the child

Okay lets just assume when I say hitting I mean spanking because we don't really say spanking over here Yeah but whether you hurt the child or not, you're still teaching the child that it's okay to hit others when they have done wrong. Even if you're not hurting the child, if a child decides to copy your actions on another child, that child can be hurt. Children don't realise their own strength.

[karter]

spanking.. hitting and beating and spanking are 3 different things . it wouldn't hurt the child

But you do realise that 'just spanking' could escalate to hitting and beating and serious abuse later on?

[!x!dude!x!2]

Okay lets just assume when I say hitting I mean spanking because we don't really say spanking over here Yeah but whether you hurt the child or not, you're still teaching the child that it's okay to hit others when they have done wrong. Even if you're not hurting the child, if a child decides to copy your actions on another child, that child can be hurt. Children don't realise their own strength.

yes that's a chance that could happen . but you aren't hurting the child with a spank. ( which is less than a hit) you spank them on the bum.

But you do realise that 'just spanking' could escalate to hitting and beating and serious abuse later on?

but if your spanking your child and its turning to you beating the kid later on them you aren't a fit parent