Open Relationships

[MKR&*42]

I don't particularly care if other people in the world do it, but it's not something I'd personally pursue.

[Empired]

Actually just out of interest what does everyone consider polyamorous relationships to actually be?

Everyone saying "no I couldn't possibly share the one I love" or "if you want to be with more than one person then it's not really love is it" isn't really how I see it at all (from my very limited knowledge of the subject, I should point out. I'm no expert and have no experience in the area at all, it's just something I thought was interesting). But you all seem to be saying it's like everyone has a finite amount of love they possess and that people can max out on love or something?
As far as I see it the more people you love the more love you have. And I don't just mean romantic relationships but familial, friendships, anything like that.

edit: ok great now I sound like a hippie and am embarrassing myself but I just idk
I guess it's just stuff that I've thought about - it may well be that I thought I'd be up for it but if the situation ever arose (highly unlikely lol) I'd actually be really uncomfortable in an open relationship. Who knows~

[dbgtz]

But that would just open up a huge debate about nature over nurture? For fear of sounding too much like a tumblr SJW I'll just say I don't think it's realistic in 2016 to generalise all women as maternal and therefore that they want to stick to one sexual/romantic partner.

It is probably, yes. I doubt there's ever been a poll regarding women being maternal, and a brief look turned nothing up, so who knows in that regard.
Perhaps looking at divorce rates and who "initiated" them would perhaps be the best way to show who's less tolerant of their other half when it comes to male/female marriage, but I can't imagine such statistics exist. Even if they did, there's so many more reasons people split beyond sex.

Ultimately, if there's no proof at all, then I don't believe it.

[-:Undertaker:-]

To be fair to Undertaker, he's not saying it's acceptable for men. He just thinks, in his eyes, women have more "sense" which means they wouldn't want it.

exactly.

I didn't think he was saying the first bit at all, I'm just interested why he's particularly shocked that like, me and Alicia are OK with it!

men usually think down there and women up there.

I won't put word in his mouth too much longer as I obviously don't actually know, but I assume it's down to biological stereotypes i.e. men want to spread genes (and also has a lot of testosterone which does have scientific links to aggressive behaviour I believe) and women wants to raise the child because maternal feeling.

I just want to be clear I don't personally care what consenting adults do in their own time.

exactly right again.

it's like in the animal kingdom too a lot of males compete for women and idea is to spread genes far and wide. survival instinct in the sex drive.

[lawrawrrr]

exactly.



men usually think down there and women up there.



exactly right again.

it's like in the animal kingdom too a lot of males compete for women and idea is to spread genes far and wide. survival instinct in the sex drive.

i think i understand the idea of what you're saying but i've never felt an urge to "spread my genes" and I don't even have a high sex drive so it's not that part of an open relationship i'd look for! I wouldn't say I get BORED of relationships or people but I do sometimes need a break and I do miss the excitement of a new thing developing so that's where my main definition of an open relationship is. But I do feel the need to say that I wouldn't consider it without consent of course, otherwise it is cheating (which is a whole other topic)

Although I'd be open to a triad relationship too, it just seems more relaxed, you can get away when you want but still have people to look after your significant other(s). I believe I could care deeply about two people in the same way so I'm open to it?

[RyRy]

I couldn't do it, I'm a pretty protective person over whoever I love so the idea that they were buggering with somebody else just makes me sick to the core.

I can see why others may do it, I mean essentially it's what people do already except what you're doing is putting a label on it of "open relationships" where others may just see it as hooking up from time to time and appreciating each others company... playing the field, so to say. (keep in mind i'm refering to single people who play the field loll)

I don't think there's many people who'd disagree you should put all your eggs in one basket in that respect, its just when you take it to the level of boyfriend and girlfriend and also saying you can have multiple bfs and gfs, thats just a wee bit weird.

[OldLoveSong]

i believe a relationship is between two people and thats that, nothin else to it