No confidence

[JT-Fan]

Okay I have a problem, I am really not confident at all. I get embarrased to talk to new people and nervous and worried, and Im in a situation. Theres this youth club I wanna join..but everyone knows everyone there. Its for my gujrati community so everyone knows each other even more! They have like bowling,cinema nights,trips to theme parks etc with people ages like 13-25 and I REALLY wanna join. But there was this religious festival and they were all there and I couldn't speak to them..I got nervous.
I really wanna join but I get all shy and nervous..they're all in their own groups and I feel really embarrased to go and say HI IM RUPS!
How do I go up to them?
How do I talk to them?
Yeah..I really need help please

[sarey]

Hey rupsie. ;[

At first, joining a new community and being there knowing hardly anyone can be really nervewrecking, so i think at first, you should just go up to them and smile, then introduce yourself, REMEMBER TO BREATH!, and then just try to fit in, i mean, your a brilliant girl with loads of qualities who shouldnt be embarrased or nervous about meeting new people and sharing some good interests.

If that seems to much, then just hang around by them, and smile, say hi, and when you feel ready, introduce yourself, ect. ;]

Hope that helped a lil bit.

Sarah.x

[JT-Fan]

Yeah it did but I jsut dunno how..i get all hot and embrassed

[sarey]

Just think to yourself 'I can do this, theres nothing to be worried about'.

Dont be scared to introduce yourself and making friends at this community.

Sometimes, it helps to practice it in the mirror, on what your going to say, maybe you could try that? Might boost your confidence a tiny bit. ;]

[JT-Fan]

Hmm I'll try I just get RLY nervous

[sl4rt-is-banned]

bring a firend

[Seacat]

either take one of your own friends or just approach them, they probably felt the same as you when they first joined

i know it's easy when another person says it, but my opinion is theres no need to be embarrassed :P spending all your time worrying about what others might think of you is time wasted where you could be enjoying yourself :)

[the wombats]

either take one of your own friends or just approach them, they probably felt the same as you when they first joined

i know it's easy when another person says it, but my opinion is theres no need to be embarrassed :P spending all your time worrying about what others might think of you is time wasted where you could be enjoying yourself :)
We know your not shy with the stuff you tell us on MSN...

Anyway, just go upto them and talk to them, tell them your name and interests ect. Normally they'd come and talk to you though if your new..

[JT-Fan]

aww rly nice posts ppl but u see i cant bring sum1 else coz its 4 my community only..and i have no mates in my community..nun at all hence y im going to this..so i have 2 go alone!!

[entor M]

Ask one of em a question about youth club, what they do, and use that to start a conversation, then ask about joining, if there a close group already, chances are other people in that group will talk to you as part of a conversation you open with any one of em, so you could probably start to get to know em from that "/ Formal introductions always seem a bit wired to me outside formal circumstances.

[Kotu]

It's quite normal to feel nervous, shy, or intimidated when meeting new people. It's just some people are better at covering it up than others :p

I think the best thing to do is maybe take a friend with you, or speak to the Youth Clubs organisers before hand - maybe they can sort something or help you out a bit.

[foxyfox00]

Maybe try to approach someone who seems to be shy like yourself. Most likley theres someone in your postions aswell.

Also try talking to people in smaller groups, that will be less intimidating. You could ask people once you know them a bit, to hang around etc. Maybe if theres someone who you talk to offer you msn addy and get to know them better online.

Good luck

[JT-Fan]

update: theyre all going 2 the cinema on friday night..i can go along but yeah i still feel RLY shy!

[Ostinato]

Okay I have a problem, I am really not confident at all. I get embarrased to talk to new people and nervous and worried, and Im in a situation. Theres this youth club I wanna join..but everyone knows everyone there. Its for my gujrati community so everyone knows each other even more! They have like bowling,cinema nights,trips to theme parks etc with people ages like 13-25 and I REALLY wanna join. But there was this religious festival and they were all there and I couldn't speak to them..I got nervous.
I really wanna join but I get all shy and nervous..they're all in their own groups and I feel really embarrased to go and say HI IM RUPS!
How do I go up to them?
How do I talk to them?
Yeah..I really need help please

Okay... It's all just mind over matter.

Think about it, why let yourself be overcome by this silly fear and confidence problem - you can't let something like this rule you all your life and you need to take control of it whilst you still can.

Now, I'm not saying there's some magic pill that simply makes you confident all of a sudden - because their obviously isn't, but it is something you can work on and improve upon.

Now, you say your friends and people you want to get in with go to this youth club. Well why don't you go? They had to meet each other and introduce themselves and get to know each other at some point! Just go and go stand with them and say 'hey guys!' and give them a wee smile. It's not as though their all going to turn round and expect you to give some 30 minute presentation on your life, is it!

It's most likely you'll be involvedin activities and sports etc. with each other, that are designed for team building and will help you build relationships with them. You can then take it from there, and get to know them all better individually.

I say you should go to the pictures! Just try and put your 'shyness' out of your head, because the more you think about it, the worse it's obviously going to be. Just be yourself, and act the way you would around your family and people you already know - that way they'll get to see the real you.

Honestly though, you need to get over it. It's not worth losing out on friends and being left out of things for! :]

Hope I've been of some help, hehe.