Anger Problems

[Delimed]

Yeah, Basically over the last couple of weeks I have had trouble with my anger, not being able to control it, for example the other week this person was being mean to me in P.E (which is a awkward subject for me because of my disability) and I would usually just take this on the chin but this time that didnt happen, I let my anger take over me and I punched him and his tooth came out.

And for some people that don't know I have got dyspraxia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Developmental_dyspraxia) which makes me physically clumbsy and offbalanced, and people in school take the piss out of me for it by calling me '*******' and '******'

I'm not usually like this, I usually can control my anger, but now I can't for some reason.

Help would be appreciated

Ben

[DPS]

I'm going to be serious with you Ben, coming from someone whos been there, and done that.
When i was around 14 untill i was around 18 i had massive anger issues, and would actully go outside and pick fights, didnt care if i ended up being beaten up, getting a beating was a thrill back then.

I learned to focus my anger, so i baught a punchbag, i think you should do the same, let the anger build up, all day, get home from school, and just slowly let it release into the punchbag.

But congrats for punching the *** kid, next time knock him out. :)

[Delimed]

I'm going to be serious with you Ben, coming from someone whos been there, and done that.
When i was around 14 untill i was around 18 i had massive anger issues, and would actully go outside and pick fights, didnt care if i ended up being beaten up, getting a beating was a thrill back then.

I learned to focus my anger, so i baught a punchbag, i think you should do the same, let the anger build up, all day, get home from school, and just slowly let it release into the punchbag.


But congrats for punching the *** kid, next time knock him out. :)

Thanks Jord, I'm not aloud a punchbag though haha my mum says 'Violence is wrong and you should not resort to using your fists in any way' but yeah if I done that to him in one punch, Think what I could of done if I kept on hitting him :O Anyway thanks mate, It's appreciated.

Ben

[DPS]

Thanks Jord, I'm not aloud a punchbag though haha my mum says 'Violence is wrong and you should not resort to using your fists in any way' but yeah if I done that to him in one punch, Think what I could of done if I kept on hitting him :O Anyway thanks mate, It's appreciated.

Ben

Your mum needs to get outside and take a look around, lol clearly Violence is needed now days for somethings. and a punchbag just helps remove anger, or find a wall to hit, i used to do that before i got one. its perfect for getting your knuckles soft.

[Delimed]

Find a wall to hit LOL I want to control my anger, not break my hand

[DPS]

Find a wall to hit LOL I want to control my anger, not break my hand

It helps, think of the pain in the hand, will make you not wanna hit things.

[Mark]

Tbh Ben, I wouldn't call that anger problems. I'd call it sticking up for yourself!

[T@R]

a punch bag would definitely help, and it would be supressing your violence and aggression so i'm not sure what your mum is saying by not letting you have one...
i'm not sure how old you are either, but as a teenager you're bound to go through moodswings (i don't mean that in like a patronising way 'cos i still do at 18) so you should just try and keep to yourself if you're feeling particularly angry and avoid people you don't like

[Stephen]

It helps, think of the pain in the hand, will make you not wanna hit things.

So your advice to him is when he's angry he should self harm :|

[Narnat,]

If you aren't allowed a punch bag use a pillow or something soft that you can take your anger out on that wont get broken and wont injure you! I totally understand how you feel, my mate has dyspraxia and I saw how he got treated! If it's a continuing problem I would maybe go for some Anger Management they should help you with more ideas on how to let of steam! Good luck.

[Delimed]

Thanks Nar!

[GirlNextDoor15]

Well, I don't pick up fights like DPS said. But, I do get angry if the some people did something quite rude or annoying to me. I would actually scold them WITH reasons. I wouldn't say it's a big problem, Ben. Maybe you should consider going to an anger management group. :)

[Jazz]

From experience I would say to help control your anger think about the worst thing which could come from the situation, when I personally did that it scared me out of doing it. Also I would say that you could maybe talk to your school? Most schools have a system of helping kids with either like anger management issues or just need a bit of support :) Going to the school was the best thing I ever did, they gave me sessions of speech therapy (a bit like counselling, but less intense.. more friendly) and they issued me with a 'cool down card' (ment I could leave lessons without permission if I was angry). As mentioned by others, a punchbag is a great way of releaving stress (I used a pillow before I got one js :p)

Hope this kinda helped :P

[Oleh]

Or just buy a punch bag, you can beat your punchbag up as much as you want and it won't fight back or get hurt. Nothing bad will ever come from punching foam.

[Slowpoke]

Cannot actually believe that some of you are telling him that violence is the answer to some things. Nowadays, violence isn't just punch-ups. 50 years ago the majority of fight would involve punching and that'd be it. Nowadays, fights between teenagers (and adults for that matter) often escalate for no reason and knives get involved. I am aware you're only young (13 or 14) but you'd be surprised to see that even that age range, getting feuds with the wrong sort of people is a bad idea. And no, I'm not sprouting crap, I'm speaking from personal experience. I suggest you refrain from any violence my friend, and seek some anger management councilling. It doesn't make you a dafty, I myself used to have serious anger problems and I've done some awful things but I went to anger management councilling and they do have some tried and tested methods to help you control it (and I'm not talking about counting to 10 and breathing deeply).

[Jordan:A]

You could try writing in anger, just write about how much of a **** they are and maybe some names to call them?

[Tom]

The worst thing you can do is bottle up how you're feeling. What you need to do is speak to someone, a friend, a teacher, a school pastoral worker. You'll find you can get things of your chest without the means of violence. Speaking about things such as people calling you for your disability to people you are close to helps to clear your mind, continue with life etc. Obviously they will continue, but the more you speak about it, the more stronger mentally you will become, up until you actually don't need to speak to someone anymore and you just ignore them and don't take anything to heart. Obviously, through your teenage years you'll have major mood swings and depressive times but that's just life, you can't do anything really.

So to summarise, just speak to people close to you about it really - get it off your chest. Don't result to violence and you should be okay.

(If anything doesn't make sense or I've repeated anything in the above sorry, I was watching TV at the same time so I wasn't concentrating and not even looked over it :P)

[Delimed]

Ok, i'm starting to get sick of this, the other day got called a little name, kicked a football at a car and nearly caused a crash.

[DPS]

Ok, i'm starting to get sick of this, the other day got called a little name, kicked a football at a car and nearly caused a crash.

That aint your problem :P

[beth]

Ok, i'm starting to get sick of this, the other day got called a little name, kicked a football at a car and nearly caused a crash.

well that's a stupid thing to do ;l what is kicking a football at a car gonna do except potentially maim others? take a deep breath and walk away. what's a name? a name is nothing. is a name gonna kill you? no. you just need to take a mature attitude and get over the names and walk away. the bullies will probably respect you more for not rising to it. they're only looking for a reaction and time and time again yr giving them one.

[Sharon]

Ben, like Bethie said they are playing with you so you react and the best thing to do is just not to. If they see you go sick they will get a kick out of it and carry on. Next time just walk away and let all your anger out in a different way. I'd also report it to someone at school.