Gender change as a child

[Richie]

Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt support 7year old Shiloh's desire to be called "John".

http://www.wthr.com/story/27704067/angelina-jolie-brad-pitt-support-shilohs-desire-to-be-called-john


I am having a debate with Red; about this topic, I said if I had a daughter of that age and she said she wanted to cutt her hair off and dress in boys clothes that I wouldn't allow it.

I know a lot of you obviously agree with the child's decission but for me, that child can make massive decissions that will affect their life when they're older, I am fine with that but I'm not allowing an infant to make massive decissions like that.

If my daughter still has these thoughts as a teenager id be accepting and would support them but as an infant I think those decissions are something they shouldn't be allowed make themselves.


Am I just ignorant or do I have a valid point?

If your daughter came to you at the age of 7 and said she wants to be the opposite gender would you accept that and go out and boy clothes / other boy like features to support them?



iPhone

[Lewis]

I agree, wait until they're a bit older into their late teens. If they still think that way, then that's there choice and I wouldn't stop them. But a seven year old can't make a choice like that, especially imagining all the bullying she'd probably get in school...

I see nothing wrong with gender change as long as you're not making the decision at the age of seven :P

[Kyle]

better to allow it and moderate the behaviour so that it doesn't get to a point where it's going to be problematic than to outright refuse to cater to what the child wants. certainly too young to request any sort of actual gender realignment but to want to dress up in a different way and be called by a different name is perfectly acceptable imo. probably just doing it to get rid of the name shiloh tbh.

[Jurv]

bullying shouldnt even come into consideration lewis, she's not doing anything wrong

i completely agree with it as long as there's no immediate surgery, she looks cute as hell in a suit anyway

[MKR&*42]

The child should be allowed (to an extent) to act as much of a boy as they desire. Obviously don't consider sex reassignment surgery for them at all, but as long as the child is comfortable dressing up and acting like a boy etc. i can't see why a parent shouldn't allow it.

[Empired]

bullying shouldnt even come into consideration lewis, she's not doing anything wrong

i completely agree with it as long as there's no immediate surgery, she looks cute as hell in a suit anyway
We know that bullying shouldn't come into this jurv, but bullies are pretty much always ignorant little ***** who are afraid of change or anything they don't understand. Therefore if a girl suddenly turns up to their school in boy's clothes and has changed her name to John, she will be bullied. I know it shouldn't happen, but it does.


The child should be allowed (to an extent) to act as much of a boy as they desire. Obviously don't consider sex reassignment surgery for them at all, but as long as the child is comfortable dressing up and acting like a boy etc. i can't see why a parent shouldn't allow it.
this

If my daughter decided she thought she was actually a boy, I would support that. She can wear boys' clothes and call herself John but I will not let her make any permanent decisions until she's (for argument's sake I'm going to keep calling the child a she) older. So I will not let her legally change her name until she's old enough to do it herself (16 I think?), no surgery obv. All the changes she wants to make must be reversible in case she changes her mind.

[buttons]

Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt support 7year old Shiloh's desire to be called "John".

http://www.wthr.com/story/27704067/angelina-jolie-brad-pitt-support-shilohs-desire-to-be-called-john


I am having a debate with @Red (http://www.habboxforum.com/member.php?u=81989); about this topic, I said if I had a daughter of that age and she said she wanted to cutt her hair off and dress in boys clothes that I wouldn't allow it.

I know a lot of you obviously agree with the child's decission but for me, that child can make massive decissions that will affect their life when they're older, I am fine with that but I'm not allowing an infant to make massive decissions like that.

If my daughter still has these thoughts as a teenager id be accepting and would support them but as an infant I think those decissions are something they shouldn't be allowed make themselves.


Am I just ignorant or do I have a valid point?

If your daughter came to you at the age of 7 and said she wants to be the opposite gender would you accept that and go out and boy clothes / other boy like features to support them?



iPhone


I agree, wait until they're a bit older into their late teens. If they still think that way, then that's there choice and I wouldn't stop them. But a seven year old can't make a choice like that, especially imagining all the bullying she'd probably get in school...

I see nothing wrong with gender change as long as you're not making the decision at the age of seven :P
she's only cutting her hair and changing her clothes so i don't see the problem? i would agree with waiting for surgery but someone said it best, when a woman said "they can't make decision at that age", another woman replied "but they make the decision to kill themselves" which is spot on. which would you rather have?
if my child wanted to wear 'opposite sex clothes' and play with 'opposite sex' toys, i would not see the problem at all. children do often say they want to be a boy/girl or an airplane or something then change when they're old so i would agree with waiting until they're about 12 and see how they feel then but wearing different gendered clothings or toys is the least u can do for them

[mrwoooooooo]

That's what happens when you name your child Shiloh :rolleyes:


Edited by mdport. (Forum Moderator): Please don't post pointlessly!

[Kimmy]

But then she'll be stuck in her mid-teens trying to figure out who she really is and going through massive change, when it could be well established when she's the younger age with the aid of her parents; of which most teens these days lack.

[Lewis]

she's only cutting her hair and changing her clothes so i don't see the problem? i would agree with waiting for surgery but someone said it best, when a woman said "they can't make decision at that age", another woman replied "but they make the decision to kill themselves" which is spot on. which would you rather have?
if my child wanted to wear 'opposite sex clothes' and play with 'opposite sex' toys, i would not see the problem at all. children do often say they want to be a boy/girl or an airplane or something then change when they're old so i would agree with waiting until they're about 12 and see how they feel then but wearing different gendered clothings or toys is the least u can do for them

I wouldn't mind them having the opposite sex toys. Nor would I mind opposite sex clothes, as long as it wasn't noticeable to other people for the own child's sake. They can do whatever they want when they're an adult and I wouldn't mind, it's there choice, but there certainly should be limits to avoid going through torment and bullying at a young age at school or wherever else. No one should really know about it during such a young age especially.

That's what I basically meant. If today's world was a bit more accepting, which it should be, then in my opinion I wouldn't really mind although any big decisions still should be made as an adult.

[buttons]

I wouldn't mind the opposite sex toys. Nor would I mind opposite sex clothes, as long as it wasn't noticeable to other people for the own child's sake, I also wouldn't mind that. They can do whatever they want when they're an adult and I wouldn't mind, it's there choice, but there certainly should be limits to avoid going through torment and bullying at a young age at school or wherever else.
young kids actually aren't that prejudiced. it's teens and adults who are.

[Lewis]

young kids actually aren't that prejudiced. it's teens and adults who are.

Seems rather equal between all age groups around my area.

[Kyle]

I wouldn't mind them having the opposite sex toys.
if shes too young to change gender shes too young to be using sex toys m8

[Lewis]

if shes too young to change gender shes too young to be using sex toys m8

god damn my placement of words

[Futz]

I dont agree with people calling her a boy

I think it's fine if a girl wants to dress in a stereotypical boyish fashion, short hair and boyish clothing

but I dont think you should tell your kid that she is a boy when her gender is female

I wouldn't call her John either, I'd call her her name and if she wants to change it when she's older she can

It could be a phase and getting used to calling her a different name or telling people she's a boy could influence the kid to have to keep the act up

[OldLoveSong]

I was a tomboy when i was younger nd always wanted to wear boys clothing. Most likely cuz i was grown up around mainly men nd wanted to be one, had all male cousins n boy friends. Grew out if it eventually

[Neversoft]

Let her do what she wants; gender difference is a social construct. If she feels more comfortable identifying as a boy, then that's fine.

[FlyingJesus]

omf a female with short hair and trousers what is the world coming to???!!?

It's doing no harm and the bullying argument is crap; the only thing kids might do is if they've been brought up by people like Richie they'd ask if she's a boy, and since the kid seems to identify as one they'd say yes and that's the conversation over. What if you had a kid who was massively into Digimon or something equally rubbish, would you force them to abandon that? Because those sorts of things are targets for bullies too. If someone wants to bully someone else they will find a reason even if there isn't a real one, you can't save your kid by taking away their freedom of expression.

[Jssy]

I wouldn't allow gender assignment at that age but if my child decided they weren't the gender they were born I would support them and allow them to be the person they want to be. Throughout growing up I dressed as a tom boy and most of the time I prefferred track suit bottoms and boys jumpers, I had my hair cut short and it didn't do me any harm, I still have short hair right now and wear mens clothes more than womens clothes but I am really feminine. Some children might grow out of it, some might not but I would support my child all the way, it doesn't change their value as a person. Then if when they're older they wanted gender reassignment I would support that too :)

[Jurv]

We know that bullying shouldn't come into this jurv, but bullies are pretty much always ignorant little ***** who are afraid of change or anything they don't understand. Therefore if a girl suddenly turns up to their school in boy's clothes and has changed her name to John, she will be bullied. I know it shouldn't happen, but it does.

therefore parents or whoever else should teach bullies not to be ignorant instead of trying to change the mindset of a young boy/girl who hasn't done anything wrong

[Empired]

therefore parents or whoever else should teach bullies not to be ignorant instead of trying to change the mindset of a young boy/girl who hasn't done anything wrong
I know that and you know that, but most parents of bullies don't. I understand your frustrations jurvy but expecting bullying to be eradicated "because it should be" is an impossible expectation. Instead we should be teaching our children to be accepting of others and resilient to unavoidable bullying.

[FlyingJesus]

You've lit just said "we can't stop people from being ignorant so we should try to stop them from being ignorant"

[Empired]

You've lit just said "we can't stop people from being ignorant so we should try to stop them from being ignorant"
what no
I thought i was saying you can't make other kids stop being ignorant but you can influence your own children. you can't stop other peoples' kids being bullies but you can stop your own

??????????

[mrwoooooooo]

That's what happens when you name your child Shiloh :rolleyes:


Edited by mdport. (Forum Moderator): Please don't post pointlessly!


wasn't a pointless post. thanks

Edited by Calum0812 (Forum Super Moderator): Please don't post pointlessly, thanks!

[-:Undertaker:-]

I wouldn't allow it, no - and hopefully it would just be a phase.

Well done also to those in this thread who have argued, despite running the risk on this forum (which doesn't reflect the general population at all) of being called every name under the sun. The fact is that a little girl, unless a tomboy, should be encouraged and should want to dress and play as a little girl and vice versa for a little boy. Every parent wants their children to be normal, and hopefully guide them towards that... if in the longer run it doesn't work then that is sad and that's another topic, but at younger ages it is up to the parent how the child dresses and not the child. Boys and girls are different.

Little Johnny shouldn't be wearing his sisters knickers or skirt.

[FlyingJesus]

The fact is that a little girl, unless a tomboy, should be encouraged and should want to dress and play as a little girl and vice versa for a little boy.

Why is this? I know you think that anything other than lumberjack boys and housewife girls is some abomination and we should all worship the Victorian factory life but you never come up with anything other than "because it/they/we should". Then again you also state that every parent wants their child to be normal as opposed to happy, so I guess we shouldn't take your thoughts on parenting too seriously

[-:Undertaker:-]

Why is this? I know you think that anything other than lumberjack boys and housewife girls is some abomination and we should all worship the Victorian factory life but you never come up with anything other than "because it/they/we should". Then again you also state that every parent wants their child to be normal as opposed to happy, so I guess we shouldn't take your thoughts on parenting too seriously

Well exactly, because it undermines a society blending boys and girls so that men act like complete wimps. Virtually all successful civilisations need the alpha male to provide and defend for them just as it is our basic human instinct that goes right back to when the males protected the small tribal group, it has been that way throughout history: dressing little Johnny up in a dress doesn't make you progressive, clever or compassionate. Infact, it is very strange and only confuses the poor children, as well as undermines his confidence in himself as a man.

Boys need role models to aspire too (Nelson, footballers, Churchill, masculine superheroes) & girls the same. Boys & girls are different, I won't pretend otherwise.

[FlyingJesus]

So you think girls are wimps, and that there's somehow still a need in metropolitan society for hunter-gatherer warlike type males en masse...

And no, what undermines ones confidence "as a man" is being told that the things you love somehow make you less of one. Furthermore dresses have only been seen as unmanly for the past like 200 years so either you want to stick with ancient tradition and animal instinct or you want modern enforcements, pick one.

[-:Undertaker:-]

So you think girls are wimps, and that there's somehow still a need in metropolitan society for hunter-gatherer warlike type males en masse...

Females aren't as masculine naturally and thus for example don't inspire leadership or strength in the way a man does. The modern feminists can deny it all they want, but even the most successful women in leadership have adopted masculine traits in order to be able to compete on the level of men: I mention Elizabeth I below but could just as easily mention Margaret Thatcher who shaped her public image very much as a man. Why? Because masculinity by nature provides for good leadership and that is just the natural order.

It's interesting that the degenerate side of this debate wants to have all the little boys dress as their sisters and vice versa, and basically bring up a generation of losers - which is just what happened in education where by social scientists said not to push children into a certain field because they should do whatever makes them feel good: so you have a load of losers prancing about on stage feeling good about themselves meanwhile the kids in China and the far-east are learning how to add up and spell. Which civilisation is going to come out on top? And it's the same with this, will a civilisation that tells its children (especially the men) to dress up like girls and act like girls if it makes them feel good survive or will a civilisation that teaches its men to build character and act like men survive? It's a no-brainer.


And no, what undermines ones confidence "as a man" is being told that the things you love somehow make you less of one. Furthermore dresses have only been seen as unmanly for the past like 200 years so either you want to stick with ancient tradition and animal instinct or you want modern enforcements, pick one.

Don't give me this revisionist rubbish that boys have only been seen as masculine in the last 200 years since the Victorian or Regency era, complete rubbish. Even Elizabeth I as a female monarch made huge efforts to be seen as a masculine monarch which you can see in her portraits and so on. The truth is, masculinity comes naturally more to boys (with some exceptions) and the more feminine side to women: anybody who has a standard family (aka two parents together the HORROR!) knows this, they know that a mother and father are both different but important in different ways.

So I won't be dressing my little lad up in a dress, no.

[FlyingJesus]

masculinity by nature provides for good leadership and that is just the natural order.

Partial truth. This combined with your use of the term "alpha male" shows that you don't really know what you're talking about past a few buzzwords, as otherwise you'd be aware that an alpha is a singular leader of an entire group - you cannot have a whole society of alphas, and therefore your ideal of forcing everyone to be the same cookie-cutter macho man falls flat


It's interesting that the degenerate side of this debate wants to have all the little boys dress as their sisters and vice versa

[citation needed]
I know lying about what your opponents have said is your main form of debate, but seriously no-one has said anything like what you're suggesting is being said


Don't give me this revisionist rubbish that boys have only been seen as masculine in the last 200 years since the Victorian or Regency era, complete rubbish.

Again not what I said, you are really quite useless in debates. What I said is that men have only been taught not to wear dresses in the west in the past couple of centuries, which absolutely is correct as any dress historian can tell you. You leaping to the assumption that I then meant that masculinity hasn't existed before then shows exceptionally poor reading and comprehension on your part


masculinity comes naturally more to boys (with some exceptions) and the more feminine side to women: anybody who has a standard family (aka two parents together the HORROR!) knows this, they know that a mother and father are both different but important in different ways.

So I won't be dressing my little lad up in a dress, no.

So again you're back to "that's just the way it is!" and "this is what we all HAVE to do" without giving a real reason. Warrior/defender males and housewife/babymaker females are not roles that are necessary to stick with in modern society (something you claim to be a supporter of) as we do not face natural threats the way humans used to, and going by your own biological determinist theory all of the things that you think of as masculine or feminine are going to be inherent in the child anyway, so their fashion decisions won't affect them anyway

[Neversoft]

Well exactly, because it undermines a society blending boys and girls so that men act like complete wimps. Virtually all successful civilisations need the alpha male to provide and defend for them just as it is our basic human instinct that goes right back to when the males protected the small tribal group, it has been that way throughout history: dressing little Johnny up in a dress doesn't make you progressive, clever or compassionate. Infact, it is very strange and only confuses the poor children, as well as undermines his confidence in himself as a man.

Boys need role models to aspire too (Nelson, footballers, Churchill, masculine superheroes) & girls the same. Boys & girls are different, I won't pretend otherwise.

You are completely out of touch with the modern world. I don't look up to manly politicians, footballers and masculine superheroes, but will readily admire feminine icons, who I find as inspiring as any man; am I not 'normal' (you should use ordinary in the future)? Why am I defined - in your view - by my gender? That is regressive. I didn't ask to be born male and would expect to be treated, like everybody else, as an individual. If Johnny wants to wear a dress then he should be allowed to and feel comfortable doing so. Are you aware it was men who first wore tights and high heels? Is a ballet dancer a failure as a man? What bull****.


Females aren't as masculine naturally and thus for example don't inspire leadership or strength in the way a man does.

Wow.


It's interesting that the degenerate side of this debate wants to have all the little boys dress as their sisters and vice versa, and basically bring up a generation of losers - which is just what happened in education where by social scientists said not to push children into a certain field because they should do whatever makes them feel good: so you have a load of losers prancing about on stage feeling good

Just stop.

[Sian]

Considering normality is a social construct we can very easily change with proper understanding and compassion, then no matter your age we should encourage anyone, kids included, to do what makes them feel comfortable.

It certainly doesn't mean operations etc, but I do believe kids know if they dont feel right in there own bodies, dont force a child stereotype onto them, explore how they feel, understand them.

[Metric1]

I wanted to be a doctor and an astronaut when I was 7. I'm cringe at the sight of blood and I'm terrified of heights and flying. Who's to say "John" who's terrified of her vagina now isn't going to be terrified of her "penis" later.

[karter]

Gender change is reversible though (?) unless you're having reconstructive surgery and I think they don't do it on children (?). So if it turns out to be a "phase" then no harm I believe?

OT: I'd support my child if they decide that they're of the opposite gender but I can understand that parents may have objections regarding a child's safety if they opt for that.

[Empired]

I wanted to be a doctor and an astronaut when I was 7. I'm cringe at the sight of blood and I'm terrified of heights and flying. Who's to say "John" who's terrified of her vagina now isn't going to be terrified of her "penis" later.
I don't think John is terrified of her genitals :P I'm not entirely sure a fear of blood and heights is a good comparison to gender identity either :L And it's not like she's going to have an irreversible sex change in the next few months, she just wishes to identify as male now. She may wish to identify as female (or one of those other ones I don't know much about) in the future and she'd be completely free to do that.

[e5]

I agree that a 7 year old shouldn't be able to make those decisions to have a sex change, as they're probably too young to comprehend what it actually is, although if you think about it and they got it done whilst so young that they would probably not get bullied by peers when in high school (as people do get bullied for it) if they decided to do it as a teenager. It would also give them more time to get over it if people were judgemental. Personally, I wouldn't allow it at that age though.

[FlyingJesus]

Changing the way you dress isn't a sex change :P

[velvet]

i love coming back to habbox to read the drivel that undertaker spews... i swear in 5 or so years his views and opinions haven't matured and broadened.
what about, for example, egyptian men? they wear dresses, kiss each other and hold hands down the street. certain things that are considered effeminate in the western world really aren't elsewhere.

defining people by their gender is regressive and oppressive.

ETA: when i was a kid i slicked my hair back, didn't wear makeup, wore boys school uniform and boys clothes in general - didn't get bullied at all at that stage in my life. if my kid wanted to do the same i'd be cool with it.

[Metric1]

I don't think John is terrified of her genitals :P I'm not entirely sure a fear of blood and heights is a good comparison to gender identity either :L And it's not like she's going to have an irreversible sex change in the next few months, she just wishes to identify as male now. She may wish to identify as female (or one of those other ones I don't know much about) in the future and she'd be completely free to do that.

It was more of a perspective, but I understand where you're coming from as well. We all want what we can't have. I'm one of the gifted people who has somewhat of what others want BUT that being said there are things that are out of my reach that I simply cannot have right now. I can tell you right now a vagina is not one of them. I feel that at age 18 when you are a legal adult you should be able to make your own decisions, until then you should suck it up. I mean if I was 7, or 17 and I wanted my penis chopped off I would be mortified right now. I'm a firm believer in "what god made us" - if god chose to give you a penis and you wanted a vagina - tough titty, it's one of those things that you can't change.

[jke]

Boys need role models to aspire too (Nelson, footballers, Churchill, masculine superheroes) & girls the same. Boys & girls are different, I won't pretend otherwise.


which is just what happened in education where by social scientists said not to push children into a certain field because they should do whatever makes them feel good: so you have a load of losers prancing about on stage feeling good about themselves meanwhile the kids in China and the far-east are learning how to add up and spell.

What's the difference between 'prancing about on a stage' and 'prancing around on a football field' that makes a footballer a more suitable role model? What does a footballer bring to society that someone who works on a stage doesn't? Surely that is the social scientists would describe as one that makes you feel good

It's been highlighted several times throughout the thread, most children go through phases and while I'm not saying that this is simply a phase that she will grow out of, seven years old is very young for someone to be 100% certain. The body/mind can and does change a lot through puberty and if after she still feels she was born into the wrong body then she should start considering permanent changes.

Simply dressing up in clothing designed for boys and calling herself John is harmless. I think if her parent's are supporting of it, It's fantastic and will build a better relationship between them because of the support and trust.

[FlyingJesus]

Well you can

[Lewis]

i love coming back to habbox to read the drivel that undertaker spews... i swear in 5 or so years his views and opinions haven't matured and broadened.
what about, for example, egyptian men? they wear dresses, kiss each other and hold hands down the street. certain things that are considered effeminate in the western world really aren't elsewhere.

defining people by their gender is regressive and oppressive.

ETA: when i was a kid i slicked my hair back, didn't wear makeup, wore boys school uniform and boys clothes in general - didn't get bullied at all at that stage in my life. if my kid wanted to do the same i'd be cool with it.

To your first comment, that's a completely different culture though--just like men wearing kilts in Scotland as one example. Also to be fair I think in this day you're more likely to be bullied if you're a male going to school in a dress, makeup, or whatever else that's feminine than a female going to school with boy-like clothes and no makeup... Or maybe that's just my area.

Just by judging around about where I live, it is a very prejudice place. It is probably unlikely that a girl dressing up as a boy would get really teased or bullied at all, but a boy in girl's clothes... that would be a completely different story.

If my child (I don't want a child anyway) wanted to do things of the opposite gender, sure. But in no way would I let, for example, my son go out wearing anything extremely feminine. They'd get non-stop bullying. Although when it comes to a girl, that just doesn't seem to happen as much but there would still be limits.

I have nothing against gender change at all though, and if they wanted to go through with it at an older and maturer age, they can feel free knowing that I'm with them all the way.

[MKR&*42]

What I find most amusing about this thread is that a lot of you would say 'no I wouldn't let my child act/dress up as the opposite sex cause they'd get bullied' yet I guarantee you if I asked you "does that mean you wouldn't ever let your ... let's say 14 year old child ... come out as gay to his friends (if he asked you about it) because he'd get bullied" then your response would be different.

Just because someone might get bullied it doesn't mean you have the right to do even more damaging emotional effects by denying them the right to be as gender "mixed" as they desire. Bullying sucks but there are always people in the world who will try and bring you down. By denying your child freedom of expression you are just as bad, if not worse.

[karter]

^^ I think she meant that all societies and cultures don't have a rigid definition of male and female gender norms. There's also presence of more than two genders in a lot of cultures (e.g: South Indian sects of Hinduism). Femininity and masculinity are aspects of one's personality. Rest of the correlation of strength and leadership and aggressiveness to males and sensitivity to females are gender stereotypes and nothing else.


I agree that a 7 year old shouldn't be able to make those decisions to have a sex change, as they're probably too young to comprehend what it actually is, although if you think about it and they got it done whilst so young that they would probably not get bullied by peers when in high school (as people do get bullied for it) if they decided to do it as a teenager. It would also give them more time to get over it if people were judgemental. Personally, I wouldn't allow it at that age though.

What do you think is the appropriate age then? (Keep in mind that the gender change we're talking about here is merely related to appearance and change of name)

[e5]

^^ I think she meant that all societies and cultures don't have a rigid definition of male and female gender norms. There's also presence of more than two genders in a lot of cultures (e.g: South Indian sects of Hinduism). Femininity and masculinity are aspects of one's personality. Rest of the correlation of strength and leadership and aggressiveness to males and sensitivity to females are gender stereotypes and nothing else.



What do you think is the appropriate age then? (Keep in mind that the gender change we're talking about here is merely related to appearance and change of name)


For some reason I automatically assumed it would be a full transformation, or atleast drugs to make it so they grew body hair and took male hormone drugs or whatever.

if it's as simple as change of clothes and name then it's not so bad

[Empired]

What I find most amusing about this thread is that a lot of you would say 'no I wouldn't let my child act/dress up as the opposite sex cause they'd get bullied' yet I guarantee you if I asked you "does that mean you wouldn't ever let your ... let's say 14 year old child ... come out as gay to his friends (if he asked you about it) because he'd get bullied" then your response would be different.
What I find funniest is people saying "I wouldn't let my child...". How exactly do you plan to stop your child from dressing up as the opposite gender, asking their friends to call them by another name? Sure, you probably can whilst they're young but the second they hit 12 or 13 they will do whatever the hell they like and short of locking them up in a Tangled-style tower, there's nothing you can do as a parent :P