Child birth without an income?

This is one of those situations where unexpected circumstances can make things much more difficult. I was not planned; My mother was 17, and my dad was 16 when i was conceived. They had the support of both sets of my grandparents, and had a plan set up (My mother was starting college, while my father was going to work with his dad in his construction business until she finished). Unfortunately, my father died in an accident three months before I was born.

Because of this, my mother had a very difficult time supporting me while going to school. Through all of this, she still managed to finish her degree and go on to make a lot of herself. It took a lot of dedication, and I have a lot of respect for her because of the struggles she has had to deal with. Of course, we did not have everything we always wanted back then, but we got by.

There is a big difference between people who live their entire lives on welfare and those who use it as a temporary means to help while they are trying to improve their lives.

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Originally Posted by JoeyK.

There is a big difference between people who live their entire lives on welfare and those who use it as a temporary means to help while they are trying to improve their lives.

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Hit the nail on the head

As long as a person is able to/planning to financially and socially support the child then I think age is, at least partially, irrelevant.

It is the competence and morals of the mother/father that is the issue. I totally agree with the original post, a friend of a friend of mine now has two children, she is 19 and has never had a job. She lives entirely on benefits and has been provided with a council house to live in.

Whereas I, and most of the country have to work damn hard to save for a deposit and work hard for a LONG time to get a house. Really gets me angry :@

Dude WTF do you personally know this woman and man, do you know there intentions?

Maybe they don't plan on keeping it, maybe they'll give it for adoption maybe they have a source of income.
Most likely your posting something the you don't know anything about. You don't know if they have money saved up if the family has money and such.
Maybe they didn't even plan on having a baby, even birth control and a condom can't stop pregnancy.
And just cause they get pregnant by mistake don't mean they can't have it, sounds like your pro for abortion
*REMOVED* anyone pro for abortion is latterly :)($&: in the head.

I'm done but I could go on and on-__-

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---------- Post added 27-10-2011 at 04:31 AM ----------

Btw I was given a life of poverty and I turned out great16 years old legally living on my own supporting myself -actually living with my girlfriend but legally an adult to the "system"
Growing up poor turned me into a man at 16. I'm living the real life 10 times Better than I was growing up

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---------- Post added 27-10-2011 at 04:35 AM ----------

Your expressing all your opinions, most of which is blabbering and you don't know anything on the subject,
*REMOVED*,
Seems fair you don't wanna bring a baby into the world with parents with no income..
*REMOVED*

Threads like this should be removed immediately because of people like me.

I'm quite offended from this kid -.-

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Edited by Infectious (Forum Moderator): Please do not make rude remarks aimed at other members!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Vinnie:Safety

Dude WTF do you personally know this woman and man, do you know there intentions?

Maybe they don't plan on keeping it, maybe they'll give it for adoption maybe they have a source of income.
Most likely your posting something the you don't know anything about. You don't know if they have money saved up if the family has money and such.
Maybe they didn't even plan on having a baby, even birth control and a condom can't stop pregnancy.
And just cause they get pregnant by mistake don't mean they can't have it, sounds like your pro for abortion
*REMOVED* anyone pro for abortion is latterly :)($&: in the head.

I'm done but I could go on and on-__-

Sent from my iPod touch using Forum Runner

---------- Post added 27-10-2011 at 04:31 AM ----------

Btw I was given a life of poverty and I turned out great16 years old legally living on my own supporting myself -actually living with my girlfriend but legally an adult to the "system"
Growing up poor turned me into a man at 16. I'm living the real life 10 times Better than I was growing up

Sent from my iPod touch using Forum Runner

---------- Post added 27-10-2011 at 04:35 AM ----------

Your expressing all your opinions, most of which is blabbering and you don't know anything on the subject,
*REMOVED*,
Seems fair you don't wanna bring a baby into the world with parents with no income..
*REMOVED*

Threads like this should be removed immediately because of people like me.

I'm quite offended from this kid -.-

Sent from my iPod touch using Forum Runner

Edited by Infectious (Forum Moderator): Please do not make rude remarks aimed at other members!

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I think you best stop making judgemental responses and threats, you state you turned out ok yet you also state "I want to murder you for that" ok...

I know the girl, I knew her through school, I knew her through college, and I know her now. I know their relationship circumstances, I know my town. So please do not judge me as someone who makes irrational threads.

Nor am I pro abortion, not once did I say the child should be aborted, I said the child shouldn't be brought into the world, aka, shouldn't be conceived in the first place until the family have situations to bring it up in.

As with all circumstances, nothing is 100%, yes children can grow up in poverty and turn out great, but its what influences our countries poverty at the moment where families are bringing children up when the parents can't even control themselves.

Also I know the birth was intentional, as it was posted on Facebook that she wanted one, and she seemed pretty darn happy about it. I hardly doubt a mother of 18 would be cheering the birth of an accidental child, as it's pretty much a large flaw in your life at such a young age.

So please refrain from being rude and jumping at me with irrational comments, because if you read my post and yours, there is hardly any correlation to what you're going crazy at me for.

Also you probably want to hold your tongue if you say you want to murder someone then say you turned out fine, because quite frankly your murder comment was hypocritical to the statement you thought I made, which I never. As abortion is frowned upon less than murder, although yes, still bad in most cases, excluding rape of course.

Also, you say i'm expressing my opinions, you do realise it is the debate thread in which it is open for debate, aka, i'm open to changing my mind if a reasonable statement came along proving positive thoughts of intentional birth into poor backgrounds at young ages. So yes, i'm expressing my opinions, but they're open to change.

I'll take your sig into mind, but that pretty much sounded like a bad attitude to me.

Personally, I don't think people should have kids if they cannot actually financially afford to have them. It is just stupid and ignorant. Why should others have to pay tax for your to get benefits because you can't afford to look after the kids you optionally chose to have?

I have been quite fortunate (or unfortunate I guess) for my parents to not have wanted kids until they could easily cope with the financial side of things. I firmly believe my quality of life has been far better than it could have been because of this, as it has meant I have grown up in a financially secure background. On the other hand, my parents are not as young as most parents (although having said that I have a friend whose dad is 74/75 now and she is 16. But they are multi-millionaires..)

Now, don't get me wrong, of course there are situations which no one could have foreseen. Loss of jobs, death etc. But in reality a vast amount of people who are not financially able to cope with the children they chose to have are not in that position due unforeseen circumstances. Another point I will make, I would be totally against any idea of only have kids when you have x amount in the bank, but to me it is just common sense.

You would rent a house you could only afford to live in for a month due to the £15,000 a month rent, so why the bloody hell have children?

@ Marketing - Life is funny sometimes. Even people who think they have a high paying stable job may find themselves out of work a month later, especially in today's economy.

This is an interesting debate, because most of the responses have been from people who have never been put into a position to raise children. A lot of the time, you do not decide when you have kids. Birth control is 99% effective - each time you use it. I know plenty of people who took precautions and still ended up being parents, and most of them are damn good ones.

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Originally Posted by JoeyK.

@ Marketing - Life is funny sometimes. Even people who think they have a high paying stable job may find themselves out of work a month later, especially in today's economy.

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Think you missed part of my post :)

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Now, don't get me wrong, of course there are situations which no one could have foreseen. Loss of jobs, death etc

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Originally Posted by Accipiter

I think you best stop making judgemental responses and threats, you state you turned out ok yet you also state "I want to murder you for that" ok...

I know the girl, I knew her through school, I knew her through college, and I know her now. I know their relationship circumstances, I know my town. So please do not judge me as someone who makes irrational threads.

Nor am I pro abortion, not once did I say the child should be aborted, I said the child shouldn't be brought into the world, aka, shouldn't be conceived in the first place until the family have situations to bring it up in.

As with all circumstances, nothing is 100%, yes children can grow up in poverty and turn out great, but its what influences our countries poverty at the moment where families are bringing children up when the parents can't even control themselves.

Also I know the birth was intentional, as it was posted on Facebook that she wanted one, and she seemed pretty darn happy about it. I hardly doubt a mother of 18 would be cheering the birth of an accidental child, as it's pretty much a large flaw in your life at such a young age.

So please refrain from being rude and jumping at me with irrational comments, because if you read my post and yours, there is hardly any correlation to what you're going crazy at me for.

Also you probably want to hold your tongue if you say you want to murder someone then say you turned out fine, because quite frankly your murder comment was hypocritical to the statement you thought I made, which I never. As abortion is frowned upon less than murder, although yes, still bad in most cases, excluding rape of course.

Also, you say i'm expressing my opinions, you do realise it is the debate thread in which it is open for debate, aka, i'm open to changing my mind if a reasonable statement came along proving positive thoughts of intentional birth into poor backgrounds at young ages. So yes, i'm expressing my opinions, but they're open to change.

I'll take your sig into mind, but that pretty much sounded like a bad attitude to me.

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Youre talking bad about a woman who went to college. She obviously has an education then, so she obviously can get a great job to support her family.

Sounds like youre making all this up for some debate, shes 18 and having a baby, what are you lieing about her age? the whole story? or going to college?

And yes this is one of them times, when it sounds like a bad attitude and it really is.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Vinnie:Safety

Youre talking bad about a woman who went to college. She obviously has an education then, so she obviously can get a great job to support her family.

Sounds like youre making all this up for some debate, shes 18 and having a baby, what are you lieing about her age? the whole story? or going to college?

And yes this is one of them times, when it sounds like a bad attitude and it really is.

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I don't make debates, and if you look at the first post you'd see it was moved to this section.

1) College in the UK, is not what College is to america, it is basically your final years of high school but with only 1 specialist subject, aka we'd get a BTEC or A Levels that would then up us onto University

American schooling system is

Juniors?>Seniors?>Highschool?>College? I believe

The uk's is:

Primary(Juniors)>Secondary(Seniors)>College(High school)>University(Your equivalent to college)

Obviously we've misunderstood each other due to the differences in our different education systems.

My friend got pregnant at 15.. She had no job and no house. However i believe that the child has had THE best upbringing i have ever seen. The nicest 6 year old ive ever seen in my life, she is so sweet and innocent, so polite and she doesnt kick up a fuss about anything. Now that kid was brought up on hardly any income and now her mum has her own house, a brilliant job and still spends time with the kid. Shes 21 and she had her mum and her friends around her to support her. We all thought that she was going to be on benefits but she prooved everyone wrong. Just because of one *hate to use this word to describe someone* mistake when they do not have anything, doesn't mean they will have nothing in the future..