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I think there's been a thread similar to this in the past but I couldn't find it and I wasn't sure so I thought I'd post it anyway!
I know many people get jealous in relationships - it's definitely a problem for me although I am improving a lot!
I was wondering how people on here who share this problem deal with it because I honestly don't know what the right thing to do is when I get it! Is there a right way to deal with it?
I don't think there's a proper way to deal with it...It's natural to be jealous, you can't stop it but if your boyfriend says he loves you and shows no feelings for anyone but you you've just got to trust him :)
I've had a really jealous girlfriend in the past, like beyond sane-jealous. She was a nutter.
it's just natural to be jealous and speculate. i'm sometimes really bad at this lol and i think it effects the relationship!!!
Dude that's not advice ;llQuote:
Originally Posted by Oli
OH WELL SORRY MISS MOD.Quote:
Originally Posted by RNB.Queen
I will expandddd. It's gotta be hard being jealous all the time, what you need to do is look at it rationally - I mean 'cause most jealous thoughts are irrational lets face it. Look at it rationally, call yourself stupid for thinking such things and it should start going away.
o dear lord didn't realise she was asking for advice LOL :|
urm i don't know, don't think there's much you can do, maybe try talking about it?
YOU BETTER BE -.-Quote:
Originally Posted by Oli
Joke Oli xoxo
Edited by Garion (Assistant General Manager): Please do not post off-topic.
Ah well biggest problem. Think about it this way, he must adore you, if he's going out wit u!
ur lovely - if he can't see dat I'll come smash his face braaaaaaaap
not necessarily, trust me i'd know;)Quote:
Originally Posted by ItsSharon
if you let jealousy and paranoia get in the way you'll only push them away, if you've got no trust you shouldn't have a relationship.
i don't get really get jealous, if someone tries to make me they can forget about it. i actually get emotionally attached easy but normally when we're not together
I used to get jealous of other girls being around my ex, it's a natural thing to do (to a certain extent) but is also such an awful feeling.
I read somewhere about how to help try and control it, and I just tried to find it for you as it was really useful and helped to explain why you did it rather than how to curb it, but I cant find it anywhere :(
Basically it was just saying how this jealousy is often built from a low self esteem. If you don't feel confident within yourself (ie having thoughts such as "Why is he with me? there's so many other pretty girls") then your own self doubt will be reflected onto your boyfriend making you feel like there's chance you could lose him.
I did this all the time, my ex knew quite a few girls and a certain few had no shame in openly flirting with him especially in front of me, as though to try and get a reaction (why do girls feel the need to do this? it's so low) Im not exactly the most confident person, and it started to make me resentful. But the thing is you've got to try and get into you head that if these girls were that special, then surely he would of picked them?
I know thats easier said than done as jealously is such a strong feeling, but it's needs to be controlled or it can start to cause resentment.
Even if I'm not in a relationship with them, but have feelings for that person I get jealous. Haha, pathetic but I just do!
My girlfriend the now can get insanely jealous because I have so many female friends. What she needs to realise is that she doesn't have to be jealous, she's my girlfriend, not any of the other ones.
Sometimes they (usually the female) has a right to get jealous, because a lot of the times the guy's trying to bite off more than he can chew!
Definitely not true lol only 2 of my gfs I really wanted to be with.Quote:
Originally Posted by ItsSharon
Ohhhh what as if girls aren't just as bad? Such stereotypes simply aren't true these days.Quote:
Originally Posted by HotelUser
tbh I don't so much get jealous as just bemused like why would they wanna be with someone else when there's me around :S genuine thought pattern there loving it loving me etc
Lmao same ;p it's natural so you can't help it?Quote:
Originally Posted by Froobet
u nd nicki broke up? i j o k eQuote:
Originally Posted by Oli
ermm u cant deal with it nd id say its alri to be a little jealous it just proves u love / like the person nd dnt wana lose them
yeah but if it's like psycho like jealous then that's beyond toleration me thinksQuote:
Originally Posted by Richie
I know right! Annoys me a lot to be honest.Quote:
Originally Posted by RNB.Queen
I always get jealous :rolleyes:
I don't mean to and I hate how I do but like I'm usually always scared that I'm going to lose that person to someone else and because they mean alot to me, I don't want that to ever happen.
Awww thanks Shazzy :DQuote:
Originally Posted by ItsSharon
That makes total sense, you're right, if I can't trust someone I shouldn't have a relationship. I usually trust, I think I just have irrational moments sometimes. I'm controlling it better now! :DQuote:
Originally Posted by buttons
Quote:
Originally Posted by Richie
I'm too good to lose a person to someone else (H)Quote:
Originally Posted by Keri?!
lol jk... but my fear of losing them probably does explain my occasional irrational moments!
Thanks for all the replies so far :D I'll +rep who I can!
Jealousy stems from having no trust in the person you love, if you have this issue you dump them.
im a pretty untrusting person nowadays (my 3 ex's made me that way) so i kinda dont trust any girl these days - therefore i cant get jealous anymore
Bit of jealousy is fun, but I think its important to trust someone.
It is natural to be jelous tbh, i used to get it when i first started going out with my boyfriend cause hes in a class full of girls so hes with them all the time and them dancing around him and flinging themselves all over him but i soon got over it tbh. Just think, if a guy is talking to another girl it doesnt matter, cause he picked you not her, thats what i kept on telling myself :)