cringe but kinda need advice

~~Immenseman~~ · 28-12-2009, 12:42 AM

unlike majority of these threads this is irl although before someone tries to make a funny comment yes we met online (no not habbo ;l) but we've met a few times now. anyways, well basically, some of you already know but yeah. i really like someone. they say they like me. been the same for about a month, we spend a bit of time together, admittedly not much because they've recently been in hospital but yeah we're always talking to one another text msn facebook or when we go out together.

they keep hinting at a relationship and this is what i want but i'm really scared to commit because i have trust problems, i don't really trust anyone and i'm scared of getting hurt. so yeah i really want to be with them and i don't want them to get fed up of me messing about but i'm also too scared to get too involved.

yeah lol didn't think i'd ever have to post on here but i want advice and i'm guessing someone has been in the same position before. i know it's a bit vague but it has to be that way

as people on here know the person irl too

+rep to good post and -rep to bad ones

Hiro · 28-12-2009, 12:48 AM

Get to know her more to develop your trust with her.
As for the other parts, I get scared to get too involved too :rolleyes: XD

~~Immenseman~~ · 28-12-2009, 12:51 AM

i know them well enough but the thing is the longer i spend trying to develop trust i feel is wasting time and don't want them to be like ;l chop chop and lose them

Hiro · 28-12-2009, 12:53 AM

I guess you could be open about it. I'm sure she'd love for you to be open about having trust issues. I mean, girls supposedly like the weaknesses of men, or something like that.

kk. · 28-12-2009, 12:55 AM

I know you've said you're scared of getting hurt, but you're youngish at the moment so what's the worst that could happen? You might end up with a broken heart per say but as I said, you're young and you'll soon get over it. I mean, since you're going uni, I presume you'd split up by then anyway?

I'd personally go for it, but make sure they know that you'll need to focus when you need to and vice versa. Good luck

**cocaine** · 28-12-2009, 12:58 AM

jake im going to be frank cause i have EXACTLY the same problems as you. girls will get bored of waiting around for you to ask them out and get the ball rolling. they'll move on and find someone else. at least thats what its been like for me, and it's happened once and ALMOST twice but i realised what was happening and made sure i got the last say

.

Sammeth. · 28-12-2009, 01:06 AM

If they can't go at your pace then obviously they don't like you enough to try and work at the relationship, and therefore you're probably better off without them. Keep it at a pace your comfortable with and if they genuinely do like and appreciate you then that'll be reflected in whether or not they want to be with you through whatever. I think everyone has trust issues and insecurities, but thats just what makes us human. She'll have the same sort of little niggles. It'll all be part of developing the relationship.