Overbearing/ridiculous parents

[Empired]

The only way I can think of that would change the way your mother sees things is if she read this thread.

This is a good idea! I hadn't thought of this before. I guess it could possibly turn round and she could start yelling at you about how you embarrassed her in front of a load of other people, but at the same time, she is still your mother and under there she does still love you. If you can get her to see the truth (either through this thread or otherwise), maybe she'll understand?

[MissAlice]

You yourself admit to being moody and it seems your mother is too. This is the area you need to work on.

You have two parents who do provide for you, who also give you a roof over your head as well as supporting you through University. So as much as it’s difficult at home right now, you need to accept their rules, it’s their home and not a hotel. You are very fortunate

To be treated like an adult you need to behave like one, and please don’t take this the wrong way, as I’m not attacking you, but you need to step up and show your parents that you are a responsible adult. You are capable of making your own lunch, and pitching in with things around the house without having to be asked to do so. You manage when you are away from home right?

I don’t know if it’s possible, or what your mothers’ interests are, but it might be good for you to have an outing out, just the two of you. Not clothes shopping, or food. Does she like plants? An outing to a garden centre or something similar. This could be the first of many opportunities to become friends and not just mother and daughter.

[Rozi]

It sounds like you're stuck in a very tough situation and it might just be a case of waiting it out. Very importantly you've had proper conversations about it and expressed your feelings. That's a very hard step to get over, but unfortunately it sounds as if your parents just wont accept your point of view. Maybe it's time to do a re-evaluation of the inequalities between you and your sister, and what it actually comes down to. Does your sister behave differently around the house to you? You say she has a much better relationship with your mum than you do, so maybe you should suggest to your mum that you and her have a one-on-one day to build your relationship? Maybe offer to take her for dinner or something, to show you are capable of being responsible and caring for her too.

Also maybe it's worth having a chat with your sister, seeing what she thinks as in the end of the day she knows the situation far better than any of us.

[Neversoft]

Firstly, you're the eldest and the youngest is always seen as the "baby"/"little angel who can do no wrong" even if they're the devil's child so I think you're just going to have to accept that no matter what she'll always be treated better.

That isn't true. I'm the eldest and get treated as the most responsible and innocent by my mum, and although my younger brother has a job and I don't, while my dad will occasionally tell me to pull my finger out, he doesn't treat us differently even though he quite blatantly gets on a lot a lot better with my brother. It's all subjective, it's just a myth that the youngest is always treated as a 'little angel'.

As for the thread, it seems to me the only way to gain the independence you want from your parents is just to leave. But seeing as that isn't an option, I'm afraid you'll have to put up with it for that little while longer. Teenagers are the most misunderstood people in the world; expected to act like adults, but treated like children.

[Inseriousity.]

I wouldn't say that it's a myth just because you had a different experience. Perhaps you're just the exception to the general rule. In my own family my sister is the youngest and gets away with murder sometimes! It seems to be a similar case here so that's why I said that.

[lawrawrrr]

Thanks to everyone who's replied recently. I'm going to have to just deal with it for a bit tbh. Trying to do everything she asks me to (and more) so she has no accusations. I'm trying to keep my business to myself now, not telling them things that's going on (after last night where they told me I was obsessed with other people's lives and basically a useless nobody) and staying out of their way, thank god.

Going to try and get a job next year so I don't have to spend as much time at home. The charity shop I work on and off in now only gives me 1 shift a week and they're not very nice to me there either, I have the worst luck

[Empired]

Thanks to everyone who's replied recently. I'm going to have to just deal with it for a bit tbh. Trying to do everything she asks me to (and more) so she has no accusations. I'm trying to keep my business to myself now, not telling them things that's going on (after last night where they told me I was obsessed with other people's lives and basically a useless nobody) and staying out of their way, thank god.

Going to try and get a job next year so I don't have to spend as much time at home. The charity shop I work on and off in now only gives me 1 shift a week and they're not very nice to me there either, I have the worst luck

Listen to music that you like when you're doing jobs around the house. Whenever I have to do chores it puts me in a really bad mood but listening to music always helps me to forget. Actually you should probably listen with headphones, or you mother could go mad at you even if you have it at 1% or whatever.

And yes, I totally agree with you. You're just going to have to be the adult in this situation for a bit

[lawrawrrr]

Listen to music that you like when you're doing jobs around the house. Whenever I have to do chores it puts me in a really bad mood but listening to music always helps me to forget. Actually you should probably listen with headphones, or you mother could go mad at you even if you have it at 1% or whatever.

And yes, I totally agree with you. You're just going to have to be the adult in this situation for a bit

Usually have habbox live on cos i'm so cool Always have earphones in as I get shouted at if I play music (or even talk on skype tbh) for making too much noise (while my sister plays really loud music 24/7). Doesn't really bother me as I prefer blocking the world out with earphones anyway ahahah

[BOOMitsGINA]

Usually have habbox live on cos i'm so cool Always have earphones in as I get shouted at if I play music (or even talk on skype tbh) for making too much noise (while my sister plays really loud music 24/7). Doesn't really bother me as I prefer blocking the world out with earphones anyway ahahah

Habbox is the bomb. Js.
I know a few of my friends are in this situation. I've never personally been in a situation like this but must be hard. I've read this whole thread (was actually really interesting haha) best thing to do is just get on with your life. Besides it's only for 3 weeks which isn't that long come to think of it. So jsut enjoy getting to see your family. In a way I would just do everything your parents say because if you do that they will msot likely be like 'O.o what?' It might be a trust issue, due to you being older they think you might turn into that 'typical young adult' so just make sure you do everything your parents say and they might change their minds. I know must be hard with your sister and everything getting everything but she could egt into the same situation like you when she gets to your age. Think of it that way Not saying anything against you or anything
Never been in this situation like I said so I dont know if this will be much help or anything x

[Mikey]

I don't live with the situation your in at the moment but I do know some people that have parents like that. Also you say your sister is the angel child, how old is your sister? If she's a 'child' then she won't be as hard on her, your the adult and you need to be independent and do things for yourself. When I start college after summer I will have to pay for everything with the money I get from my student loan and if I get a job by then, I'll use that. This includes bus fares, contact lenses, mobile phone contract, lunch for college, books, stationery, clothes and socialising with friends. I will also give my mum £50 a month to help her out and she will provide me with meals and stuff. This is the exact same with my brother aswell.