I can't get over my ex-girlfriend

[Lanyon]

It's been 3-4 months since my girlfriend dumped me. We had a two-year on-and-off relationship, we dated 5 times. I now currently have minimal communication with her being blocked on just about everything to the point where the only available way of communicating is through emails, which has happened but does not reply or alternatively I could bump into her in real life by accident, which hasn't happened yet, would be quite awkward anyway and is just unlikely!

So, I've done a lot of things, remove things out of my room that remind me of her, remove photos, I've tried hooking up with other girls, I've tried to focus on my hobbies more and hang out with my friends more often. I just cannot seem to find the distractions to get over my ex-girlfriend. I have even tried hypnosis!

I want either option to happen:

• To be with her again
• To get over her and move on

To be able to be with her again would mean having to fix a lot of things, obviously after having 5 relationships would mean that we had a lot of problems, to be honest it may seem to you that we just shouldn't be together but I always hope and think that if we could make sure of a few things, learn from mistakes, we would pull through to last forever, we work well together actually for the most of it!

To get over her and move on would also be amazing but just seems impossible for me! I can't do it. I don't know how. I can't work out if it's supposed to be something automatic or something I have to do, I don't get it!?

I would love to be able to get over her and be able to look after myself, find a new girlfriend when I'm ready and find that me my new girlfriend work even better together to the point where I really don't mind what I had with my ex-girlfriend. That just sounds like an unrealistic dream to me.

To be honest, the odds of me getting back with my girlfriend are like 1 in 100000, it just ain't going to happen!

What do I do?
​How do I get over her?

[Kardan]

Just carry on with life and it will happen. You really should have no communication with her, because having 'minimal' communication won't do anything to help.

[Lanyon]

Just carry on with life and it will happen. You really should have no communication with her, because having 'minimal' communication won't do anything to help.

I'm down to the point where I can only email her. Facebook, texting, calling are all blocked on main and back-up accounts.
Even if I do manage to end communication all together, how do I deal with the fact that I am still constantly reminded of her by friends, how she works across the street from me, how I deliver pizzas for my job which involves sometimes driving nearby or on her street, how do I deal with it all? Will it all end when I move out of my parent's place to another city? I would love to be able to just get over her by tomorrow or be back with her again. I'm a total wreck! sorry

[-Moniquee.]

I reckon it is better to have minimal communication than to have heaps of communication and not have any chance of getting back together. Just try and move on . It will take time but in the end it will be worth it Phil-dawg

[Kardan]

I would say you shouldn't email her either, but that will only happen if she changes her email address (maybe she already has?) - I don't know if you can set up some sort of blacklist for sending emails, probably not.

There's no point in forcing your feelings to do anything, if you get over her, you do. If you can't, then that's telling you something, that you're not ready to let go. The thing is, it takes two to tango, and if she's not interested then you not being ready to let go doesn't mean much.

There's not much you can do, you are always going to remember that she exists, you just need to be less pessimistic about life I guess. Your life is controlled by you, and not by her. Why should you feel bad if you are on the same street as she works?

I'm not very good at this, I'm sure buttons or someone will come and help

[Lanyon]

I reckon it is better to have minimal communication than to have heaps of communication and not have any chance of getting back together. Just try and move on . It will take time but in the end it will be worth it Phil-dawg

Thanks, time sucks lol. My mum reckons 6 months, would you agree with her?

- - - Updated - - -

Why should you feel bad if you are on the same street as she works?

I'm not very good at this, I'm sure buttons or someone will come and help

It means I know when to look when she has a break or leaves work. It means that I'm constantly reminded of her. I just feel like I need to get away. I tell myself every-time I feel like I might see her leaving work on day while I'm across the street working where I work thinking "Alright Phil, if you see, her be strong about it". It's hard not to look out for her but that might just come with missing her so much. Sometimes I do manage to see her out the window of my work and then I end up being in a mad mood for the next 3-4 hours because of it, every-time! I just need to get away or get over her. I wish there was an easier way. If I can't get away, how do I challenge it and face it?

[-Moniquee.]

Thanks, time sucks lol. My mum reckons 6 months, would you agree with her?

I can't tell you that, it is different for everyone.

[Lanyon]

I can't tell you that, it is different for everyone.

Erghh yeah okay, I should have seen that coming.

[Yawn]

i think u need to chill out

[Lanyon]

i think u need to chill out

How do I do that?