It's just war

[Darren]

Hey,

Give me feedback on it, I may post more if you guys like. Positive and negitive comments are welcome aslong as they do not break rules.

How many I post is not a Spam creation, just a better way to add them!

It's just war


In the movement of day,
the start of the night.
I can hear the cries,
through the darkness and light.
It’s just war.

A man, a woman,
daughter or a son.
Millions or soldiers,
praying “thy will be done”.
It’s just war.

A shot, a shell,
another man down.
Screaming in the streets,
bodies around.
It’s just war.

A man too young,
grew up too fast.
Now he’s alone,
causing a blast.
It’s just war.

Another casualty,
nothing more, nothing less.
Fine before hand,
soon laid to rest.
It’s just war.

The sights and scenes,
nothing but gore.
Another victim killed,
and that’s just one more.
It’s just war.

Thanks,

-Darren

[kooldude23]

Last two stanza's are the best, it has a sense of sorrow to it, almost cathartic.

One thing i personally dont like is how on the last line of each stanza you say 'It's just war'. The repitition is good to begin with but it seems to drag on and you lose it's effect completly.