Girl/Friend troubles... [long post]

[Isaac]

Alright, so there's this girl I've known since elementary school. We were never GREAT friends, but I went to a few of her birthday parties and what not, and apparently at some point in middle school she liked me, although I never payed much attention to that cause I wasn't interested in girls at that time. (I was like, in 4th grade.)

Well fast forward to now, us both being sophomores in High School. We still talk and I see her every now and then, but here is the thing: I've kind of started to form a crush on her. Actually, I've had something of a crush on her for about a year and a half, but I've never acted on it (for several reasons.)

Here is where my problems begin. Of course, I've told all of my friends about me liking this girl. They all known and have known for quite some time. And while this may sound selfish, I kind of expected them to leave her to me (metaphorically, you know what I mean.) And for the most part they have, as far as I know (or knew), none of them had any interest in her.

Now it's the end of the year, and I find out one of my BEST friends (we'll call him Joe) Joe is planning to ask her out. Now, me and Joe are good friends, but Joe pretty much only cares about himself. It hurts me to say that, but its true. And I'm not just saying that because of the current scenario (although this has contributed to it, which I'll explain) but because he has done many other things which led me to believe this is true.

He just told me, like I wouldnt care. And I mean, I don't want to overreact, but I am pretty pissed off about this. It's not entirely the fact that hes asking out a girl I've liked for quite a while, but that he would do something like that when he knows how I react to this kind of stuff. I don't really ever often go after girls and when I do it's only if I really like them, and he knows that as well.

Now shes told me she doesn't like him. Apparently this has come up in the past between them. But the one thing that really gets me is that I feel like she is just telling me she doesn't like him to not hurt my feelings (she knows I sort of like her) and that if he does ask her out, theres a small possibility she would say yes.

Now every part of me wants me to be happy for them, they're both people I care about, but I just can't help but feel upset about it. Am I being too childish about this? Theres a lot of conflicting feelings between me, I really don't know how to react now. And in advance, I'd just like to say I know I'm a mess and this post is probably hard to read, but I'm just... bleh right now. Sorry.

[Mentor]

You could always just ask her out first? if she says no, then you probs didnt have a shot to begin with so haven't really lost anything anyway. If thats the case you can just move on and stop worrying about friend x whos also gonna ask her out?

Flip side is, if you dont ask and she does say yes to your friend, you'll be stuck not knowing if you would have had a shot to begin with, but equally depending on the dynamic between you and the girl it may have impacts on your friendship with em, equally asking after your other friend stated he was gonna ask her out may seem a bit off to him too "/

Dont really know situation enough the judge the variables so aboves best i can surmise. Decision on what to do is ultimate yours though.

[Lindsey]

Just try to ask her out, 1st. if she says no. you will feel better tbh., because then your know shes not intersted, tbh it will help to know how she feels about you... ;] but you know... up to you, i would just ask her out before 'joe' does. before its to late..

Take a risk, life is all about taking risks.

[iAdam]

Ask her out.

but it sounds like your in the friends zone, Oh so easy to get into but oh so hard to get out of. Like a pool of custard.

[Bun]

as others have said ask her first. if she says no then you feel better because you'll know you never had a chance, and can let your friend try. if she says yes, then you're in. win win.