Some people are just that bad.

[Firehorse]

ok. theres a lot here to explain which i'm probably going to find it hard to do so i'm going to try and list it instead.

You hang around with them and get to know them as friends, and not just 'mates' but actual friends.

All along you try and just be normal and try to figure out if ever you are annoying them and constantly improve yourself.

Then at the time when it would hurt the most, they start saying how annoying you were all along and this just pissed me right off and ofcourse very annoyed that they didn't kindly say anything at an earlier point in time. Whats worse is that for the past while they'd been saying things behind my back and to other people they definately had no right to interfere with.

So I thought; this was just a point in my life where i'd learn who my real friends were and who were just there and became a point in my life i'd move on from.

I did have a couple of real friends in the bunch who I could talk to.
There was one who I did think I could talk to and they'd care since in the past they'd shared a lot of their private things with me and even asked me for my advice on a couple of things, what hurt here is when I turned to talk to them about my stuff which was no where near as much in any terms as theirs and then firstly received no replys and then whilst at another friends house the friend got a message from them saying how I was depressed and that they didn't give a ****.

Just so you guys know i've used 'they' instead of 'he' or 'she' purposefully.

What do you guys think I should do? I know the typical answers will be walk away and that they have no longer got significance in my life, but I still have friends within the group. Also being near them would make me feel quite paranoid.

I often dislike asking for advice on these topics but the truth is I am depressed about it and typing it up does make me feel a bit better.

[dbgtz]

Just avoid talking to them or change group, its what I done during similar experiences.

I had one like the first one and I kinda had one like the second but I'm still wondering if they care or not.

[Black_Apalachi]

Basically, it sounds like you're having to adjust yourself to fit in with them. This alone tells me they aren't your real friends. I dunno how old you are but if you're about mid-way through secondary school it shouldn't be too hard to try and diversify - mix with different groups. In my own experience my friends today are pretty much the same ones I had way back in year 7 - even one or two I've had since primary school so I guess I'm sort of lucky that it just happened that way but I was still pretty friendly with various other groups and the randomers in between. By the time I got to sixth-form, the biggest divide was probably two main groups which you would probably call 'chavs' and 'non-chavs' and you could actually see the divide because the common-room was sort of in two clear parts. However the 'chav' side had the table tennis so I was over there all the time playing with them a lot and that even allowed me to make friends with the year below (once I was in the second year of sixth-form).

The best advice to find out who your real friends are is to just be yourself and if they like that person then there you go.

[Jordy]

I think you're kidding yourself that they're friends to be honest, you don't sound all that much like you fit in with them. You can't test people to see whether they're genuine friends, the way to notice is they're the people who invite you out and come over to talk to you.

Be yourself but find out how you're irritating them and work on that. Bottom line is though they're probably not the best group of friends and it might be wise to be on the look out for more. As for ******** and backstabbing, everyone does it you just got to accept it, I honestly don't know one person who doesn't do it, quite a feminine thing but all guys do it.

But yeah I find typing things out on a forum or to a person sometimes helps me think straighter, that might of helped you in it's self.