Should I try and make it work, or just walk away?

[-Adam]

Well, its a pretty long story, so yeah :/.

Went out with this girl 6 months ago, she finished me and we decided to just become friends after that. We argued pretty much everyday over small petty things, such as her ignoring me, me having a go for it, then turning out she fell asleep or somet pathetic, so yeah mostly the problems I had with her. (and if your wondering, yes, i do still like her more than a friend :/)

Gradually, we managed to slow down the arguments to maybe once-twice a week, until about a month ago. She went away for a week, so we were just texting eachther everyday constantly, normally 60-120 txts a day. On the last day, I said to her 'can you promise me something?' and she said 'what?', to which I replied 'when you come back, everything can say how it is now, textin eachother etc' and she put 'yes, i promise it can and it will '. When she got back, it changed. She stopped textin me as much, we didnt talk as much etc etc. Anyway, me being me, that led to a bustup, bigger than we had before :/.

She said she wanted me out of her life, called me a paranoid **** etc etc... but when we were not arguing we got on really well. Because we did get on well, I didnt just walk away like that, I kept apologising and asking to sort stuff out, and in the end she ended up telling me about her family problems, I gave her advice etc and it ended up us sorting stuff out etc.

Couple of weeks later, It happened again. I told her to go die(please, please dont judge me on what I said to her, I said some harsh things of which I regret deeply), called her a ****, ****, stuff like that, she replied by saying she wants to go die, she hates me, called me a **** etc, and it went on over facebook. Anyway, at school the next day, I found out she had told one of her mates everything that I said, which I didnt like because I was a harsh idiot towards her. Anyway, I messaged her saying a sarcastic thanks, and once again, we started to get along, and we agreed we should try once more at the most. This was 2 weeks ago. Since then, we have spoken most days and got along fine. She has started the conversations quite a bit. When we fell out a month ago, I deleted her number from my phone, but she text me yesterday, as she didnt delete my number.

I have really bad paranoia (this will come in later). Anyway, last night I was meant to go out with her and some mates, but I decided not to because I wouldnt have stayed out long and wouldnt be worth making a trip to meet them. Anyway, I was textin her a bit through the night, and about 10/11 i sent the last text saying, 'anyway, text me tomorrow if you want to talk ' and she put 'okay, i will, speak tomorrow xx'

Come today, I was waiting for a text, but didnt happen. About half an hour ago, I text her saying 'take it you didnt wanna speak then', which she replied 'sorry, i was busy this morning and i have had family problems all day, i will speak to you later'. I sent a text back sayin 'thats the thing though, you dont speak to me unless i start talking first, it makes me thing you dont wanna speak to me and dont wanna be friends' and she put 'i havnt spoken to anybody all day, if your gonna be like this dont ****** speak to me. i dont wanna argue, i wont text back again, im sorting stuff out' and i put 'gonna be like what?! :|. and i dont wanna argue either . and fine, if you dont want me to speak to you, I wont' and she didnt reply.

I know it sounds sad, but it kind hurts when she doesnt text me if she says she is, it annoys me :/. When we werent speaking, it hurt alot, but I started to get over it until we made up last time. Should I just walk away from all of this, or should I try and make it work? Which would be easier and worth it? also, how can I apologise and mean it for all the stuff I said?

[Nemo]

Woah man, quit the neediness. Shes probably feeling that way and getting angry at you because you're being so needy. Just lay off her lol. If she doesnt text you, then okay whatever continue with your life and day and just shrug it off. Who cares if this one girl out of billions doesnt text you back? If you get in so many fights with her, you either make a decision. Continue on how you are and keep fighting and try and work through it. Or just realise you're young and theres a LOT of girls and when you're this young theres loads of time to find someone to settle down with.

What im saying is i wouldnt bother.

[FlyingJesus]

You have a LOT of threads in this section about very similar situations so either they're the same girl and you haven't moved on since 2008 or there's a bunch of girls you've been like this with. If the first then you really need to let it go and accept that people change over time and you don't own them, because frankly the poor girl's probably terrified of you and your stalking - you're acting this way entirely for yourself because you're needy, it's not because you love her it's because you want to feel wanted. If it's the 2nd and there's been a few girls that you've got like this over then obviously you don't actually care about any of them and again it's all about you needing to feel like you have someone to yourself with them not wanting to talk to or see anyone but you. Either way it's not healthy and you need to snap out of it before you end up really hurting someone.

People are allowed lives that don't involve you

[@K]

Take one hundred steps back, I know if a girl says 'I'll text you in the morning' or something and don't then it gets annoying, just text through calmly saying 'morning ', no more, no less.

[-Adam]

@FlyingJesus - So your saying if you dont love the same girl for 4 years you dont love her at all? Yeah cause that works :|. + I dont want her to just talk and see me, I dont give a **** who she talks to, I just want her to talk to me every so often.

@ @K Yeah, but as said, I get paranoid really easily, if she doesnt text me I think she doesnt want to talk to me so I wont text her.

[Nemo]

@FlyingJesus - So your saying if you dont love the same girl for 4 years you dont love her at all? Yeah cause that works :|. + I dont want her to just talk and see me, I dont give a **** who she talks to, I just want her to talk to me every so often.

@ @K Yeah, but as said, I get paranoid really easily, if she doesnt text me I think she doesnt want to talk to me so I wont text her.

Your problem is that you know what your issue is, but you're not stopping it. You're just accepting it and continuing on with it. Would probably be best to sort that out now.

[Jessicrawrr]

I know a guy like you.
back off seriously dude, if she wants to text you she'll text you, if she doesn't get over it and move on.

[Janet Snakehole]

Your problem is that you know what your issue is, but you're not stopping it. You're just accepting it and continuing on with it. Would probably be best to sort that out now.

^ this, definitely. At least you can admit that it's your own fault though.

[-Adam]

There was a time a few weeks ago, probably a 3-4 week period, where my paranoia towards her just completely stopped, I started trusting her etc etc, but then she told me a tiny lie and it all came back :/

[@K]

Listen, I get paranoid easy also. It's a mixture of different things that have caused mine, which leads to me having problems trusting people. Just take a deep breath and think about what you say/text/type whatever before you do. Don't just go blurting your mouth off because your paranoia is kicking in or your getting pissed off, wait a second and think about what to say to her.