Justifying Unhappiness

[Daltron]

I posted a thread a few days ago asking if people are happy with their lives: See here

And I found one comment in particular very interesting which said we should not be unhappy because people have it much worse, such as having cancer.

Do you think it's a valid argument why we should be happy and not sad, that being because other people have it much worse? I am interested in everyone's thoughts!

[dbgtz]

I'd only ever consider it valid if someone is sad about not being able to do or buy something luxurious, like all of those spoilt brats on those sweet 16 shows. Though saying that, at the end of the day it's subjective.

[MKR&*42]

I thought Stephens reply was a sarcastic one to an earlier response ? Woops if not

I've had the "you don't deserve to be unhappy because others are worse off" argument thrown at me IRL and its such a pathetic one. I can use that logic and say no-one deserves to ve happy because thete is someone happier than you!!!!


It's a Crap argument and I cannot believe some people take it seriously.

[Daltron]

I thought Stephens reply was a sarcastic one to an earlier response ? Woops if not

Oh yea, I know (well think) it was sarcastic but it still got me thinking about it lol because I am sure it's a view many people hold regardless

[MKR&*42]

Oh yea, I know (well think) it was sarcastic but it still got me thinking about it lol because I am sure it's a view many people hold regardless

Oh ok

[FlyingJesus]

It's a ridiculous view that trivialises suffering and does nothing to fix any problems whatsoever

[Empired]

I think that's utterly ridiculous. Sadness is a personal thing and you cannot compare it to other peoples' feelings. Especially as it's an emotion so nobody will experience sadness in the same way.

I mean, realising somebody else has cancer doesn't make you stop crying over a breakup with your boyfriend/girlfriend because that stranger dying of cancer is not personal to you, whereas the breakup would be.

[Inseriousity.]

Tbh that thought helps me with my problems. Sometimes problems can be magnified because you feel so alone and helpless and it's comforting to know that there are people who are going through the same thing and understand how you feel and likewise people suffering through much worse. It puts your problems in perspective and helps you work out which problems are serious and which are trivial. Despite that, how to deal with issues or problems is a personal thing and telling people that they should be happy because there's a dying kid in Africa is not going to really be much use.

[Empired]

Tbh that thought helps me with my problems. Sometimes problems can be magnified because you feel so alone and helpless and it's comforting to know that there are people who are going through the same thing and understand how you feel and likewise people suffering through much worse. It puts your problems in perspective and helps you work out which problems are serious and which are trivial. Despite that, how to deal with issues or problems is a personal thing and telling people that they should be happy because there's a dying kid in Africa is not going to really be much use.

My mum does this all the time oh my god. I'm really upset about something and she just goes "CHEER UP A CHILD DIES EVERY 5 SECONDS IN AFRICA". How is that supposed to cheer me up :S Now I'm just upset and thinking about African children dying from malnutrition??

[buttons]

i don't think anyone needs to justify their feelings or actions, simple as. if someone is happy, you don't tell them others are better off than them and so they don't deserve to be happy lol. i get really annoyed when people tell me i have a roof over my head, clean clothes and water etc, it doesn't fix any emotional abuse you can suffer despite all that. be happy, be sad, whatever, it's all part of being human and you don't need to justify that.

i don't think happiness is the 'norm' and that being unhappy means something has gone wrong with you nor do i think we should strive for happiness. we have to feel all emotions in order to be whole. everyone has something they're 'entitled' to be unhappy with, some people just deal with it better..